Duck, duck…

Sorry I didn't write yesterday; it was a run-aroundy kind of a day. My stepsister and her spouse are coming this weekend, which is going to be fun for them since this house contains one chair, no table, one bed and 400,009 boxes.

At any rate, I was preparing for their visit and all of a sudden it was 10. Which is when I go to bed. I am very persnickety about getting enough sleep. There is a woman I work with who has a 14-month-old and twin six-year-olds. Humans. She gets around four hours of sleep a night. I would kill myself daily.

Did I mention her husband works third shift? Have I mentioned I would kill myself daily?

Even though I just met her, I am forever trying to think of a way to solve her life difficulties. As though she hasn't explored every avenue in her own head.

Oh, and speaking of life difficulties, I know I mentioned there are new baby geese who flew into work. Onto the "campus." Whatever. Anyway, there are three adult geeses and three babies. Do you like me for saying "geeses"?

I have become obsessed with why there are three adults. Are these well-to-do geese and the third adult is the nanny? Is the male a polygamist? Or are they three adult women geese who are being single moms together? Maybe they all got the runaround from the same player male goose.

Alternatively, perhaps one of the adult geese is really a teen, who was a baby last year, who is somehow slacking and refusing to leave home.

I really need more to do at work.

Anyway, yesterday at lunch I was reading a book — because what's better after a morning of proofreading than a lunchtime of reading? — and the geese honked so much it got my attention.

There were the three adults…and just two babies. Oh, you don't know. You don't know how sad I got. I walked all around the "campus" (sigh) and I saw all the other, older goose families, and all their kids were in tact. I looked behind bamboo, in doorways, I looked everywhere for that baby. I do not know what I would have done had I found it. Picked it up and delivered it to a giant, hissing, pecky goose? Probably.

When I took my 3 o'clock break, the goose was still honking, like every 10 seconds. It was awful.

But I am happy to tell you that at the end of the day, as I walked to my car, I saw the family in the distance, and I actually dropped everything and ran over there to make sure I saw it right. The third baby was back. I'm sure no coworkers thought I was nuts, dancing around and screaming "YES!" over by the geese.

Oh, I was so worried a hawk had swooped down and gotten his downy little self. Maybe someone at work went out and bought a new baby goose so I'd shut up.

Also, I keep forgetting to tell you that The Nester and her sister came to see me this past weekend! Nester's sister and I have emailed because she is familiar with Greensboro, and she was basically my off-the-record real estate agent. So, they knew where I lived, generally, and when they drove past, Marvin and I were unloading the car from our daily $5,000 expenditure at Target.

It was so exciting! And I know Nester already mentioned it in her blog, because one day earlier this week I had 9 million visitors before noon, and when that happens it always means Nester mentioned me in her blog. If I am getting her sloppy seconds, I cannot imagine how many readers she must get.

Also too, Nester's mom was in the car, absolutely appalled that her daughters were dropping in on someone they really only knew cyberly. I told Nester that my mother is always appalled that I tie my bra on my head at wedding receptions, when everyone knows it's totally acceptable these days. Moms are so picky.

I had better actually shower, as although it is casual Friday, I do not think the pink pajamas and blue robe are what they had in mind. Maybe I'll wear my "I'm Obsessed With Geeses" tshirt.

15 thoughts on “Duck, duck…

  1. hi there,
    we miss you in LA! I’ve only recently been informed of your “new” blog. so funny. but did you forget about the gays of the world? maybe that group of geese were lesbians in an open relationship. spread the love and open-mindyness for all bonds. esp out in kansas or wherever you are. try to resist copyediting my typing.
    email me or else!


  2. Thanks for saying that we popped in on you instead of that we were stalking you. Because it totally didn’t feel like stalking…but I guess it kind of could be considered that. I’m so glad to have finally met you in real life. The Nester told me how very cute you are and now I know for my very own self 🙂


  3. You are too cute to be worried about the goslings…
    Here’s an update on May and June, our babies…
    They grew up, got kicked out of the nest, and are now living on there own.
    Man! They grow up so fast!


  4. Hello June,
    We had a nest of Robins in a shrub next to the front door. There were three babies. We could sit and watch out the window as Mama Robin and Papa Robin brought them food. The other day Emma and I left for school in the morning and peaked in at our little friends. When we got home from school that day, I noticed a PILE OF FEATHERS on the sidewalk…. we walked a little more… MORE FEATHERS…. and then… A THIRD PILE OF FEATHERS!!!!! Oh Emma and I were sooooo sad. Something ATE THE BABIES!!!!!!! And then…. that night when I took Buster out for a pee….. A BIGGUS FATTUS CATTUS was under my car probably picking his teeth with baby Robin feathers.


  5. What’s with Amanda, June? If you feel the need for a kid just wait another 15 years and have a grandkid.(You’re creative – you can figure out a way) They’re much more rewarding than kids!


  6. I’m so glad the baby found it’s way back to Mom. That’s probably why she was honking so and that baby said, “I think I hear my Mama calling me.”
    If you wore the pink pj’s and robe to work that would totally solitify the lady’s belief that you are strange. LOL!!!!!


  7. Have you thought maybe you need a baby? Just thinking out loud of course.
    It WILL crimp your sleeping for the first 25 years of its life but you’ll soon forget what sleep felt like so that won’t be a problem after its second day of life.


  8. Maybe the geese are from that ranch in Texas,and they flew to Greensbro to escape Child Proction. Why do you tie your bra around your head at weddings? Is it a good luck ritual?


  9. If memory serves me right (which is unlikely) I think geese mate for life, so my guess is that your ‘one of them is a teenager from last year’s babies’ theory is the right one. Or maybe there are two girls and one guy, but the two girls are sisters and one of their husbands died in the war. OK that’s depressing.
    LOL, yes you totally need a I heart geese shirt (or maybe I heart goslings).
    Today is not casual Friday for me but I am oh so casual anyway. That’s what my boss gets for taking off the Friday before Memorial day. Ha ha! I will show him with all my casualness!
    Again, infintely jealous that you got to see the Nester (and that she got to see you!)


  10. Love your theories on why there are three adult geese!!! You are so funny….keep writing….your blog brightens my day!!!


  11. I’m so glad the little goose found it’s mommy. I would have worried about it all day, too.
    I have met people that I only knew cyberly. I was chairing a quilt show (did you ever think in the entire world that you would get a quilter that needs to lose some weight visiting your blog?) and this lady that I met from a quilting yahoo group drove all the way from southern Tennessee to meet me.
    My oldest daughter was with me. She called me a dork right in front of the lady.
    My kids are like the Nester’s mom. They will just have to tolerate me. 🙂


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