One way to be sure to eat well is to have out-of-town guests come in. Yeesch.
My stepsister and her husband came to visit us. Normally they live in LA. We took them to IHOP, cause we're classy. We took them to a minor league baseball game, because they have a black Lab who brings the balls out with her teefs. We took them to a fancy dinner tonight. Actually, we split the check. So "we took them" is an exaggeration.
At any rate, you can imagine the fine food we consumed.
Are blackened green tomatoes bad for you? Cause I had that tonight as an appetizer and man, it was good.
I do not need to ask you if smores are bad. We had those too, in our back yard.
And by the way. Do you remember how my insane dog walker stole the neighbor cat because she convinced herself it was a stray? And then I made her give it back because it BELONGS to someone and she is a NUTBAR who makes animal lovers look like zealots?
Well, that cat is outside ALL THE TIME, and so her is stripey orange sister. And I am forever petting them and giving them food and water. Now, I know the woman next door loves her cats, I really do. But now whenever I open my door, they come inside and sit with me in my house like it's normal. They are just little, like maybe six months.
Do not let me steal these cats. Please stop me.
Have I mentioned how pretty they are?
Oh. And another thing. I have taken back up with the running, and it was all going well until the other day when my KNEE started feeling like it was full of molten lava. It's very unsettling.
Why do people always describe lava as "molten"? Is that an actual scientific term, or does it just mean really hot and people always say it like they say voracious reader and not, you know, greedy reader?
So, has anyone experienced the molten knee before? The voracious knee? What does it mean? Am I dying? Should I not run 7.5 miles tomorrow? Sleeping Beauty, my half-marathon partner, said I should ice it and not run. Is she full of crap? Am I full of Lava Soap or actual lava? Can I make a lava lamp out of whatever is in there?
Do you wish I'd stop now?