Prod June

Ruby

It's nearly impossible to take a good picture of Ruby, because she is all black. And it's a shame, because she's so pretty. At least here you can see her lovely profile. And she's not actually peeing on anything at the moment.

The Ask June questions have trickled in, and one was in the wrong place, much like Ruby's deposits. I should not REWARD such behavior (I won't be IGNORED, Dan) but I decided to answer it now, otherwise I will never remember that it exists. For the record, Ask June here.

Linda in CO asks, "When you proofread about something like electrowhateveritwas, do you get and retain any knowledge about your subjects, or is it kind of in one eye and out the other as you pay attention to the proofreading stuff and not the subject?
Will you eventually end up like Rosie in White Men Can't Jump, a f*ing font of useless knowledge?
"

Oh, and by the way? I am finding out that when I respond to you guys? And occasionally I do, when you leave a comment, my pithy responses are going in your spam. So check for "byebyepieblog" in your spam. There could be a pithy, pithy gem in there. Apparently "pithy" is a big word for me today.

To answer your question, Linda in CO–and by "CO" I assume you are in Colorado and not some company somewhere or hopelessly codependent–usually not. When I first started I thought oh, aren't I going to get smart, learning about statistics and math and the law and such. Yeah, no. The only thing I ever retained was the time I proofed the sex book. Did you know there is a group somewhere that bites each other's eyebrows off as a form of foreplay? Now, how could you cheat? You'd come home looking like that Pink Floyd guy when he goes crazy at the end of the movie and your spouse would be, "Where've YOU been?"

Topa

Have I mentioned lately how much I heart my Topamax? Everyone needs to fake migraines and rush to their doctor NOW.

Frankie, who can't relax, asks, "Am I allowed to be annoyed by grammatical mistakes if they're in another language?"

Frankie asked this question because everybody goes around saying "panini" wrong. I didn't know this, but once she pointed it out to me, I was perfectly willing to be snobby about it. "Panini" is Italian for sandwiches. So saying, "I'd like a panini" is wrong, as you are saying "I'd like a sandwiches." I used to lose my mind when people said "The La Brea Tar Pits," as what people were saying was "The the tar pits tar pits."

Also too? In college? My best friend majored in French, and at the cafeteria they were serving french dip au jus, and the person serving it kept asking each person in line, "Would you like that with au jus?" which is saying "with with juice" and I thought my best friend was going to stroke out.

So yes. I say you absolutely can be annoyed in every language.

I must go be annoyed in English now, as it is my job to do just that. All y'all have a fine day!

26 thoughts on “Prod June

  1. Thank you Llyn.
    Now on to burning question #2…
    Now I really need to know what the singular form of “panini” is? “Panin”? “Panine”? Oh, C’mon!

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  2. ‘Cause nothing says loving like a big ole mouthful of hair used for facial expression.
    If biting off eyebrows is just the foreplay, I think I’d pass on the rest of the mating ritual.

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  3. I think when the plural ends in -i in Italian, the singular ends in -o. So it’d be a panino? Anybody care to confirm?
    Also, does Topamax have any BAD side effects? I was all for faking ADD to get on Adderall but then somebody told me it frequently causes psychosis…so I’m still a chubster.

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  4. Myriad of…..there are myriad problems, not a myriad of problems. Myriad is a pretty literary number, like score but more than score, and less than infinity. It bugs me.

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  5. I am learning so much from this blog. I am horrible at grammer. I also? Too? wonder if English have it right when they say “I’m off to Hospital.” or “I went to grocery.” Leaving the “the” totally out. Just think how much time and energy we could save by leaving out all those extra “withs” and “thes”.
    Now about Topomax. I have migraines but have never been perscribed anything other than Kahuna telling me I just need to fart. That is Kahuna’s cure for everything. Have cancer, you just need to fart. You have run your hand through a table saw, you just need to fart. So what ARE the side effects beside getting skinny?

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  6. Those balls on the wall, I have seen those somewhere before…Does Marvin throw them up there each night (you have velcro on them and the wall, don’t you?) to drive your cats insane, or is this what he does when he isn’t in the back yard filming himself and his friend playing guitars?
    Tap Pits? Pat Tips? You so funny, June.

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  7. I was totally focused on the balls in the picture. I finally figured out they must me lights strung around the bookcase. We need another picture because we could not even look at Ruby, so distracting were the balls.
    Oh, and Topamax, I am so going to fake a magrain for that!

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  8. I can confirm that one toasted sandwich is called a ‘panino’ in Italian. 🙂
    And also that tiramisu literally means ‘pick me up’ – hence the coffee.
    But every other cake I’ve ever had that was made by an Italian was soaked in some kind of alcohol, not coffee. 🙂 Soggy is an interesting way to eat cake.

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  9. Why do you have pink whiffle balls on the wall in that room by Ruby? I’d pee all over the place too, if I thought wiffle balls might fly out of the wall at any moment!

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  10. I think they are a string of asian style patio lights. She must be going for the old Good Housekeeping or House Beautiful or whatever it was look that had a buddha in the window.

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  11. So I’m thinking it must really frost Frankie’s buns when someone says, “Let’s go get some panini sandwiches.” Sandwiches sandwiches, anyone?

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  12. I have a gorgeous boy cat named Stanley Manley who is mostly white with a black hat (like a yarmulke) a black tail, a black spot on his side (much like a Holstein cow) and a tiny black freckle on his pink nose who would be a purrrrfect companion for Miss Ruby, as he pees on everything too! Imagine the pair of them cavorting and pissing in the wind. Oh, Stanley has one green eye and one blue eye. We sometimes call him “Ole Blue Eye”. Should I send her a photo to see if she is interested in a date or rendezvous or whatever cats have? 🙂
    Yep, if it wasn’t for the peeing Stanley Manley would be a damn near perfect cat.

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  13. We have a black cat, Putter (known more often as Putz), who has incredibly long hair and a mane. Unfortunately, you are correct in that it’s impossible to get a decent picture of a black cat.

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  14. LOL on the fake migraines comment. Did you find that you were on “dopamax” at first?(couldn’t comprehend, remember anything, etc).
    I started taking Topamax last night, I’m hoping I don’t get any more spacey than I already am for heavensake.

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  15. Forget the balls, and the dildoesque looking tape dispenser. June, you have something that looks flammable around your lampshade! This is danger, girl! My daughter did that one time and her lampshade started to melt. I shudder to think what would have happened if I hadn’t smelt it burning. REMOVE IT AT ONCE. Please.
    Thank you. You may now resume whatever it is you do with the balls and the tape dispenser.

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  16. Oh, thank goodness you cleared that up, June. I was wondering if the history books would have to be rewritten to say that the ancient critters died while tap dancing in a big tar pit. phewww!

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