When I got on to post today, I saw that Marvin had left this photo of himself on my desktop:


He can't possibly think he could leave this photo there and that I would not put it up for all of you to look at. See the tidiness of his room? That's pretty much how our whole house would look now if I didn't scurry behind him 700 times a day, cleaning up.

Marvin just came in and caught me putting this up, because never once in the history of time have I ever been able to be on the computer without him hovering, thereby ruining any chance I may have of meeting a man on eHarmony and having an online affair. Anyway, he wants to know if anyone can name what kind of guitar that is.

I can. It's a brown kind.

This is basically what Marvin looked like when I met him. Oh! I was smitten with the Marvin, from the first instant I saw him. He was not so smitten with me. Which just made me like him more. Nothing is more an enticing than an indifferent boy, if you ask me. Because I'm healthy, is what I am. I followed him around for a whole school year. Once Dottie and I were at a party– Remember Dottie? Who I just spent a romantic weekend with?


Here's Dot horning in on my wedding weekend, just last week.

Well, Dot was one of my good friends in college.


Here  we are pretending to care about what's happening in a game of pool. I look drunk as a skunk.

Anyway, some other night when Dot and I were in college, similarly drunk as skunks, we were at some party at some house, and I remember I had on my sparkly shoes. Oh, how I wish I had a photo of the shoes. I bought them at this vintage store at Michigan State that I was obsessed with, and I know that was a terrible sentence. The store was called Somebody Else's Closet, but they just should have called it June's Tuition. Once I dropped a class to buy a pair of earrings there. I am not kidding.

The sparkly shoes were from the '40s, and they were silver slingbacks, and they literally had sparkles all over them. They also had really pointy toes. I wore them everywhere. With jeans, dresses, velvet petal pushers. Oh, I loved those ding-dang shoes. I do not remember the rest of my outfit that night, but I know I had the shoes on, because Dot said, "Do you know we're right by Marvin Gardens' house right now?" "No!" I shrieked, in that loud way one shrieks when one has had 47 drinks. "Let's go over there!" I said, in a voice that would have been appropriate had a locomotive been speeding by carrying 87 screeching Rhesus monkeys, each holding fully powered chainsaws.

"Okay!" bellowed Dottie, who was always up for anything.

It was important to both Dot and me that we refill our plastic cups at the keg before we set out on this journey. I remember tripping along the sidewalk in my sparkly pumps, balancing my red plastic cup of beer and trying to whisper once we got to Marvin's house. Because we weren't going to go in and say hi. Oh, no. We were going to sneak up and peek in his window. Because what better way to get someone to like you than to get caught creepy crawling his house?

Marvin lived in what was technically the sunroom of this house, which I'm sure was warm during Michigan winters, and also quite legal. Dot and I made our steady, sober way across his lawn and into his bushes, and just as we had pulled ourselves up to his window, she whispered, "Dang, I hope he isn't in there wanging his wafer or anything."


Beer came out my nose, then beer came out her nose, all our sneakiness and anonymity was lost and we had to go shrieking down the street before we got caught, so hilariously funny did we find that particular line. And of course Marvin hadn't even been home.

Years later, Marvin and I went back to his old college house and we took a picture of him holding a box of those wafer cookies in front of that window, and sent the picture to Dottie. Because we're funny that way.

30 thoughts on “Everybody Wang Chung Tonight

  1. I know I’m late but my husband says, “It could be a Gibson.”


  2. Patty says:

    He’s such a cutie! No wonder you fell for him!


  3. Gertrude says:

    I haven’t read any comments yet… I think the brown guiter is a Rickenbacker. I’m not sure if I spelled it right. I think Tom Petty plays them.


  4. Dottie says:

    I can’t imagine that I prefaced my statement with, “Dang”, but if you say it, it must be so!


  5. Debbie says:

    ok…never responded to your blog before after 1.5 years of following you. to tell me the ricken-whatever and please about my Byrds comment? what a way to wake up this morning.


  6. Rachel says:

    It is ALL about sparkly shoes! I have a pair of Steve Madden (cheap!) sequin-covered ballet flats that I use to reflect rainbows wherever I go. This lets everyone know that Someone Awesome Is Coming.


  7. Damn i can’t stop myself from posting a correction 😦
    The pants? they are called ‘pedal pushers’ because, you know, you wear them while pushing the pedals of your bike (no pant bottoms to get caught ). Unless you’re pushing daisies I guess. 😛
    Marv looks so much like my SO in that picture. They are also mess cousins.


  8. Aubrey says:

    I love how people are begging you to show a picture of the shoes when you already said you don’t have one. Maybe you could reincarnate them with watercolors and then take a picture to show.


  9. Oh you had me scared with the big pause and the big WELL. I just knew you were going to say he did have the wafer out of the box when you looked in the window. And I was thinking that I didn’t really want to know that about Marvin and I was going to have to have a sit down with June and discuss boundaries.


  10. pendy says:

    It’s Official. You are my favorite blogger. No one makes me laugh so and what fun it is to laugh. Thanks!


  11. Molly says:

    You may have answered or mentioned this previously, but do you & Marvin have your own personal computers, or do you share one? I am envisioning many hijinks if it’s a shared machine…


  12. Tee says:

    ROFL!!!!! This is so a dang funny post! I’m cracking up and Hubby is wanting to know “what’s so funny”. Too complicated to explain.
    I would have said a brown AND white one for the answer to the question of the day, but I see you have already answered the big question.


  13. Carrie says:

    Marvin looks like a young Tom Hanks in that photo…circa the movie, “Big”.
    And I had glitter shoes when you were in college, too…though I think I was like 5 years old. They were a pair of my Aunt’s old wooden mule high heels and the top leather part was covered in gold glitter. I stylishly wore them with my red and white striped footie pajamas.


  14. Oh, you two were (and still are) just the most handsome couple… that Marvin… I know he planted that picture so we’d all see how cute he was… but I can’t resist saying “how cu-ute!” I can see why you chased him, and you know he totally loved being chased.


  15. June says:

    The Ricken-whatever is the correct answer, and of course he knew that trivia about The Byrds. Please.
    And Hyphen Mama? No.


  16. Jenene says:

    The speeding locomotive…with the monkeys! And chainsaws!! I hurt from laughing so hard!!!


  17. Hyphen Mama says:

    I could almost without a doubt be positive that never in the history of the world has any drunk college girl who’s stalked a boy outside his sunroom/illegal sleeping arrangement actually MARRIED THAT BOY!!! You must tell the rest of the story. With pictures of the shoes.
    Yesterday when you were mopping up paint, were you just as smitten with Marvin?


  18. arlene says:

    Yeah, but remember everybody, this is the guy we were all mad-like at because he spilled paint on Junie’s clean floor. Dang he is cute. Hard to stay mad. I’ll bet that is why he left that pix! Can’t stay mad. Dang!


  19. Linda in CO says:

    Oh my goodness, how incredibly cute is Marvin? And cute escalates to s-e-x-y when the guitar comes with the package. Sigh…I do so love a musical man.


  20. Debbie says:

    husband says it’s a Rickenbacker.
    additional info – the original 12 string Rickenbacker is what Roger McGuinn from The Byrds played on the song Mr. Tambourine Man. See if Marvin Gardensalad knew that!


  21. Amber says:

    Haaa, I’m still cracking up! “Everybody have fun tonight…”


  22. pious girl says:

    I’m calling shenanigans on Marvin. You know he left that up there knowing you would post it. He thinks he’s cute in this picture and wants all of June’s piepals to swoon. Well not me damnit. I gave up boys with guitars for lent.


  23. The Scooper says:

    Okay. This time, instead of the coffee snorting out my nose, it’s a bit of Cabernet…accompanied by bread crumbs. Note to self: Do not read June while in the morning sipping coffee. Do not read June while in the evening sipping vino. Only read June when you are not at all thirsty and do not at all have any beverages within arm’s length. Or when you have just eaten bread.


  24. Shelley says:

    Ok, I’ll guess a Fender, just because I know that’s the name of a guitar and no one else has said it yet. Please, do tell how you finally caught Marvin? I’m dying to know how the drunk girl finally caught the eye of guitar boy.


  25. Mary Ellen from Napa says:

    I think it’s a Les Paul.
    I was holding my breathe through this whole post, I was so afraid you were going to tell me that you puked al over your sparkly shoes!


  26. Jan says:

    Oh a young Marvin Gardens. How cute he was. He was a Jonas Brother before they were even born.
    I don’t even have the time to list all of the quotes that made me almost have a beverage come out of my nose tonight. My absolute favorite is “wanging his wafer.” Oh. My. Word. FUN. NY.


  27. Cat says:

    I had about five ‘sparkly shoe’ type clothing items I wish I had saved from college. I’m giving my daughter one of those vacuum storage bags when she goes to college, so she’ll never have to get rid of her sparkly shoes.


  28. Laurie says:

    Hubby says it’s a Rickenbacher. I agree with you…a brown one.
    Would love to see a picture of the sparkly shoes. Actually, would rather see a picture or video of you walking in them after 47 drinks!


  29. Cyndi says:

    I want to hear more of this love story, but now you are just making me nostalgic for my own college days. And nights, mostly.


  30. Gladis says:

    But, June, how DID you get him to fall in love with you???


Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: