It is whatever morning it is — is it Thursday already? Or is it Wednesday? I can't keep track. Anyway, I have a cold that I got from my stepfather when I was in Michigan. I would personally like to THANK my stepfather for the COLD. THANKS, Harry.
Also too, many of you wrote to ask about what I did on my holiday yesterday, seeing as April Fool's Day is my favorite holiday. But you know, I really was too sad for it this year. Marvin did start out the day by going in the back yard and pretending the gate was open and that Tallulah had run away.
Why do people try to mess with the master? When he ran into the house with his arms flailing, all dramatic, saying, "The gate was open! Tallulah's gone!" I said, "What would have been better is if you'd said Tallulah was back there digging up the dead cat."
"Oh yeah," he agreed. "That WOULD have been better."
When I got to work, one of my oldest friends emailed me and tried to fool me and I emailed her back to tell her she hadn't fooled me in the slightest.
Again. You don't tug on Superman's cape. You don't spin it into the wind.
The only thing I did all day was call my mother and tell her Tallulah was pregnant, which she fell for, which is astonishing for 800 reasons. First, I have not managed to fool my mother since 1473. I have been April fooling her since birth, not to mention my germy stepfather WARNS her every year, a thing I would like to similarly thank him for. Could I just have my fun, Harry, without you WARNING her like some kind of siren or lighthouse or foghorn or some other warning device that I can't think of right now?
Plus also too, Tallulah is FIXED, and the only place she could get pregnant is dog day care, and everyone at dog day care has to be fixed or you can't GO to dog day care, so really, mom falling for this was pretty special. But she is as distracted as I am, so really my fooling her was just mean.
Oh, but wouldn't it be exciting if she somehow got knocked up and I had a slew of puppies? Tallulah, I mean. Not mom. That would be my dream. Marvin couldn't even get mad at me, because I would have TRIED to not have puppies, and yet there they'd be.
Anyway, I got the battery back in my camera and we are back to the nutritious black coffee. And look! I got the good mug again!
Someone asked if this wasn't a Christmas mug, and you know, now that I notice it has poinsettias and stars and a reindeer, yeah. I guess it IS a Christmas cup. But can't it be kind of not a Christmas cup, as well? I mean, it took me till now to notice it was Christmas, so maybe I can get away with it for the rest of the year. Besides, who's gonna come over and see it, I mean, other than all of you, cyberly?
And aren't you glad Tallulah is on constant watch? Don't even THINK of walking past this house, unless you want a good barking at. She's expecting, you know. Makes her cranky.