Should I hyphenate my last name as Gardens-Topamax or just be June Topamax?

My coworker just told me that she saw a young guy checking me out as I walked across the parking lot after lunch (clearly he has a strange hair fetish, but still). I can see my wedding to Topamax now: our names spelled out in flower Kleenexes above the wedding table: June and Topamax, or maybe his formal name, Topiramate. It'll be nice to be the one who isn't a pill in this relationship.

16 thoughts on “Should I hyphenate my last name as Gardens-Topamax or just be June Topamax?

  1. OK it’s time to get the peepers checked again. I just read this as Tampax too. I say you keep your name and make him change his.
    How does Starvin Marvin feel about all of this? Is he jell ass or is it a “Big Love” type of thing only with husbands instead of wifes.

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  2. I’m with Lazy Leslie up there. TOPAMAX/TAMPAX…it’s quite deceiving.
    Besides, something tells me you are a modern woman, so that pill better be changing HIS name to “Gardens”.

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  3. June Moss!
    I think you should scrap the hyphen and see if Max will go back to his original surname.
    June Topiramate. It has a ring. Dare I say? Somewhat elegant and classy. You may be getting closer to Grace Kelly…

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  4. You had me at ‘hyphenate’.
    Hyphen Ate. That says it all.
    Is there a maximum amount of weight one can lose on this drug? Or will you continue to waif down and soon be June Moss?

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  5. In one of your posts last week,there was a picture of Henry on your lap and I almost posted that if you got any littler, you’d have no lap left for Henry to sit in, but since the discussion was all about Henry, I refrained from bringing you into it.
    Please don’t shrivel up and blow away…I need my June fix.

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  6. Yes, Bell, I think that’s fine. I just refer to all of you now as “a friend.” “A friend said she was celebrating Earth Day by treating everyone like dirt!” It’s easier than explaining this odd hobby.

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  7. Last night a friend of mine was complaining about her unending migraines and I actually told her to inquire about your drug of choice. I told her I had a friend that swears by it. (That would be you doing the swearing.) Is it okay that I called you my friend? I didn’t want to explain to her that someone I had never met in my life uses it and wants to marry it.

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  8. Nothing like being checked out in the parking lot. A teenage boy told me I was cute this weekend and I almost kissed his 17 year old face! Nothing makes an old lady smile like being checked out by an breathing human!

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