In which I blog about all the things you told me to blog about yesterday, and change my name to Fuquay Varina

So, I asked you guys what I should blog about, and you told me, so here you go. I will divide up your requests with little asterisks. Don't you hate it when people pronounce it "astericks"? First of all, holy cats! I am SO not delving into why Marvin and I hated each other in … Continue reading In which I blog about all the things you told me to blog about yesterday, and change my name to Fuquay Varina

I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you read my blog anyway.

Hey, remember in June and July when all I did was torment you about voting for me in that ding-dang Funniest Blogger contest? Well, yesterday they officially announced the winners! And I wasn't one of them! So, there you go. I did not win. My blog sucks. If you want to write in and tell … Continue reading I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you read my blog anyway.

Tallulah Blueberry Gardens. Mixed breed genius.

I told Tallulah she is going to dog day care today, and she is standing here beside herself. I did not know that dogs really understood so much of what you say. I thought people were just imagining it when they said their dogs knew words. Now, if I try to discuss quantum physics with … Continue reading Tallulah Blueberry Gardens. Mixed breed genius.

You haul 16 tons of hair, and what do you get?

So now it's a normal day and I have to go to work. Carp. I forgot to take my digital camera to Michigan, so I had to buy a disposable in a rest stop somewhere in West Virginia. Naturally I stampeded to Target last night to get my pictures developed, I thing I don't think … Continue reading You haul 16 tons of hair, and what do you get?

Eleven! Eleven! Eleven. (Only Marvin will get that. And I will be really annoyed if he doesn’t read my blog today.)

Before I forget? Because you know I will? Comment of the week goes to Sharone. Do you think she pronounces her name "Sharon" and the "e" is silent, or is it pronounced Share-OWN? Things like this burn in my brain. I am in my mother's basement. Everyone has a basement in Michigan; when I moved … Continue reading Eleven! Eleven! Eleven. (Only Marvin will get that. And I will be really annoyed if he doesn’t read my blog today.)

But he’s got highhh hopes, he’s got…

Marvin has been up since 5:00, but the second he heard my alarm, he DASHED into the bathroom, and now I am sitting here in great discomfort typing you. Remember when I thought it'd be charming to live in an elderly house, even though it had only one bathroom? Yeah. And while we're on the … Continue reading But he’s got highhh hopes, he’s got…

I will not make some tired joke about hanging chads.

In case you were worried sick about who decided to be on what team, I have the results as of this writing. Team Marvin = Six votes. I would be on Team Marvin because he just gave me a GPS for my birthday. Because I am going to be forty-effing-four this week. I'd go to … Continue reading I will not make some tired joke about hanging chads.