But he’s got highhh hopes, he’s got…

Marvin has been up since 5:00, but the second he heard my alarm, he DASHED into the bathroom, and now I am sitting here in great discomfort typing you. Remember when I thought it'd be charming to live in an elderly house, even though it had only one bathroom? Yeah.

And while we're on the subject of Marvin, last night Tallulah and I crawled into bed first, because it's important for Marvin to putter around the house needlessly for several minutes after he's announced he's going to do something like (a) leave or (b) go to bed. So, Lula was pawing at her face, and I found an ant on her just as Marvin walked into the room. "How'd she get an ANT on her?" he asked, appalled. "Well, she just came in from outside. I assume one got on her there," I said.

For the next half-hour, was Marvin having Vietnam flashbacks at all, with the slapping imaginary ants and leaping out of bed and throwing back the sheets and turning on the lights because he thought there were ants?

 "I can HEAR them," he said. "Can't you HEAR them?"

"I hear Henry purring."

"No, there's a WHIRRING sound. You can't hear that whirring sound?" he asked. "Those are CICADAS," I insisted. But no. Marvin said it was a different whirring. That the ants were communicating that it was okay to get in our bed.

I eventually got up and slept in the guest bed. After a few minutes, Tallulah joined me. We slept marvelously. There's a rubber-tree plant in the other bed this morning. Don't know why.

At any rate.

I know I have brought you pain. I know I have brought you tears. I know I have brought you earth-shattering ennui and that slight twitch in your left eye, but now? I bring you buttons. Courtesy of DCRMom.

Before Marvin got panicked by ants, he sat here last night and did code-y things for each button. He said you copy that code to put these on your blog. Or on your bog, if you have one. Or even on your clog.

All's I'm saying is don't come crying to me to ask how to put these up, as you know I have no idea. Is there anyone smart out there who can leave directions for others who hate computers as I do? Thanks.


href=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/”><img src=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/photos/buttons/team-june.jpg”>


href=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/”><img src=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/photos/buttons/team-fran.jpg”>


href=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/”><img src=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/photos/buttons/team-henry.jpg”>



href=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/”><img src=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/photos/buttons/team-winston.jpg”>


href=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/”><img src=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/photos/buttons/team-lula.jpg”>


href=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/”><img src=”http://byebyepie.typepad.com/photos/buttons/team-marvin.jpg”>

42 thoughts on “But he’s got highhh hopes, he’s got…

  1. Poor Marvin. I totally sympathize. I hate ants. Maybe for fun you should rent all those giant killer ant movies to watch together tonight? Here are some choices:
    Killer Ants
    Legion of Fire: Killer Ants
    Empire of the Ants
    Phase IV
    Because my dad is a whackadoo…I have actually seen most of these. He (my dad) just has such a thing for mutant/killer animal/insect movies. His favorite: Night of the Lepus (giant rabbits). Save this one for when Tallulah finds a rabbit in the yard.


  2. All of the buttons are cute and I love them all. Didn’t vote because I am just that fickle and non-commital. I don’t have a bog, err, or a blog, so I’m not sure what I’d do with one. If, I ummm, actually knew what to do with one.


  3. ROFL @ the Rubber Tree Plant. And while I wanted a Team Henry – sorry Juney – I had to snatch the Team June cuz it goes with my whole blindingly pink, pepto bismol look my blog is throwing down!


  4. Well, first I opened a new tab under File on Firefox (or Explorer or whatever you use). I right clicked on the button picture, saved it as Team June in My Pictures on my puter then went into my blog Layout page then Add a Gadget then Picture. I clicked Browse, added the picture and went back to your blog in the other tab/page and copied your address from the address bar and went back to the Add a Picture window and pasted it into the HTML line. It works fine this way.
    I tried copying the code under my button from your post today but that didn’t work the way I tried it. I tried Add a Gadget and HTML code and pasting it there but it only came up on my blog as the code and not my button. I had to go back in and remove that so I could do it the way I described above.
    Is your hair on fire yet from reading all that?


  5. Dear Rebekah,
    I lost interest after “tab.”
    I hate computers, did you know that? But thanks for telling other people how to do this!


  6. I’m job hunting (ack) so I am considering putting this button on my resume under achievements (I don’t really have alot of those so maybe it would throw off the interviewer and they would be suffiently stunned enough to move on in the interview).
    I don’t have a blog so really, what’s a girl who likes to run with the in crowd to do?


  7. From my limited knowledge of HTML, I think you need to add “<a " to the beginning of that code. (Include the space, leave off the quotation marks. That said, when I tried it it didn't work, so I'll be using Rebekah's method. Sorry, Marvin.


  8. Uhhhh, just so Marvin knows: ants don’t whirr.
    Cicadas? Yes.
    Kitten purring? Check.
    Ants? Not so much.
    My lovely husband also freaks out about bugs. Spiders send him through the roof! It’s really quite funny!


  9. Would Marvin be as freaked out if he had Aunts in his bed as opposed to ants?
    Sorry June but can not figure out the button, button whose got the button. I’m totally fignerant.


  10. Could you please ask Rebekah to post the explanation in English? I do not understand Farsi.
    I got to “tab” and then I was all, “Me no know how do dis. Must get dog. Zali! Mommy in da well! Fetch Help! Good Boy!”
    Me no make button today.


  11. Could you please ask Rebekah to post the explanation in English? I do not understand Farsi.
    I got to “tab” and then I was all, “Me no know how do dis. Must get dog. Zali! Mommy in da well! Fetch Help! Good Boy!”
    Me no make button today.


  12. Could you please ask Rebekah to post the explanation in English? I do not understand Farsi.
    I got to “tab” and then I was all, “Me no know how do dis. Must get dog. Zali! Mommy in da well! Fetch Help! Good Boy!”
    Me no make button today.


  13. Could you please ask Rebekah to post the explanation in English? I do not understand Farsi.
    I got to “tab” and then I was all, “Me no know how do dis. Must get dog. Zali! Mommy in da well! Fetch Help! Good Boy!”
    Me no make button today.


  14. Here Furry let me translate. Go to the button you want. Click on it. Say lots of cuss words then try to find “file”. Click on everything on June’s page. Get frustrated go to Pie Neer Woman. Get pissed because you AGAIN didn’t win a prize. Come back to Junes blog and try to go throught he steps again. Look out the window, watch the bunnies eat the last of your plants. Look back at Junes blog and try to remember what you were doing.
    there does that help?


  15. Ok, my new “Team Lula” button is on my blog!
    I don’t know why anyone bothers with that code stuff. Just right click on the button you want, and save it to your desktop. Then go to your own blog and do the “add a gadget thing”, and add it as a picture. I linked the button back to June’s blog, but you don’t have to. You can just put the button there and make people wonder.
    I know someone up ahead of me already went through this way easier method of putting the button on your blog, but I thought it was worth repeating.


  16. I had to laugh when you mentioned that Marvin always has to putter after he says he’s going to leave. My husband does the same and it makes me crazy. First off, if we’re going somewhere together, I’m almost always ready first. When DH is finally ready, he’ll urge me to come on and then he’ll have to go to the bathroom or get a drink of water or look for his keys – you get the picture – while I wait some more. Or he’ll open the car door for me and on his way around the car to get in on his side, he’ll decide he needs to check the oil or set up the sprinkler in the yard, or visit with the neighbor, etc. We live in Texas and it’s hot in that car! But we’ve been married for 39 years (gasp!) , so I should be used to it by now. I’m not 🙂


  17. Well, after reading that Marvin is afraid of ants and that he hogs the bathroom, I might have to say that Marvin Gardensalad is a girl.
    And the fact that he says he’s going to bed but then does 153 things around the house before he gets there…I might even have say Marvin Gardensalad is a mother.
    The only things that are saving his reputation are his giant, Christmas-light balls.


  18. p.s. Another great the-ants-are-going-to-kill-you movie is The African Queen with Humphrey Bogart and Katharine Hepburn.
    A great classic!
    Don’t let Marvin watch it, lest he get his panties in a wad.


  19. How obnoxious would I be if I ran these through my ad builder program so that they just faded from one to another all day long? I might have to leave Marvin out though. Putterers make me nervous. Sorry Marvin.


  20. *SIGH* Sorry for all the comments, June. Typepad doesn’t like what I’m doing to try to get around its “no posting html code here” rules.
    this goes at the beginning of Marvin’s text.
    —> This goes at the end of Marvin’s text.
    Remove the stars. Make sure the ” are facing the right direction. If this comment doesn’t post properly, I give up completely.


  21. A very Happy Birthday Miss June!
    The buttons rock, I added one and I’m team June. Rachael, you are a terrible show off! Having all the buttons at once, really.
    in other news, Mr Accidental is an atrocious sleeper. His flashbacks started from the war, but are all really unrelated. He wakes up thinking he is about to get hit by a bus, eaten by a shark or covered in dust. Then he gets mad because I try to talk him down off the dresser and back into bed. At least crazy Marvin’s fears have a realistic basis!
    I’ll be singing that damn ant song all day.


  22. Are we talking those big black badass ants, or the tiny little brown ones? Because seriously, if Marvin is that freaked out by one tiny little brown ant, some therapy might be in order.
    I shared a house one summer in college where the kitchen was badly infested with the big badass ants. Every morning I would poke around in my cereal bowl before I started eating because half the time one of those things would be bobbing there in the milk. Which was gross, but not as bad as the ecosystem of pests that graced my first Seattle apartment.


  23. Poor Marvin, I don’t like any bugs in my bed either. However, I feel your pain, I had just gone to sleep last night and Hubby comes to be, I KNOW he jumped onto the bed, woke me up and it took me THREE hours to go back to sleep!!!!! I too should have moved to the guest bedroom.
    ROFL, someone is trying to give me instruction on how to do something technical on the computer. I need specific instructions, “press this button”, then “click on this”, etc.


  24. I enjoy reading a blog written by someone who has a history of tv, books and a typewriter behind them. So many of your references would be lost on the young – amusing to them, none the less. Whoops! There goes another rubber tree plant!


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