June's stupid life · Marvin

Sing with me now, this is 40 (four)!

I think I used that stupid title on one of my other birthdays. What can I tell you? I lack originality.

So. Yeah. I'm 44 today. FORTY-FOUR! At least it's one of those repetitive-digit years. I think those are cool. It was cool when I was 11, it's cool today.

Marvin surprised me with some extra gifts today.

Arf

Who hearts himself? He got a particular charge out of the "Clarence Clemons: His new knees ROCK" headline.

He also got me More, the magazine for women over 40. I will be really annoyed if I end up liking it.

I once made fun of my friend Stacy for reading Oprah magazine, and then as soon as I opened it up, I just loved it. Seriously, do you read that magazine? You know how you read those decorating magazines or gardening magazines, and you feel a sort of desperate need to revamp your entire living space? Or you read a beauty magazine and you want to spend $80,000 on plastic surgery THAT AFTERNOON? When you read Oprah, you just feel like, oh. Everything's great in the world! It's a rewarding periodical, I am not kidding you.

At any rate. I will not be officially 44 until 4:52 p.m. Because that's when I was born. And you know I kind of get perky right around then? When I freelanced, my most productive time was 5 to 9 p.m. I came up with a theory that people born in the morning are morning people, and vice versa. Don't you hate it when people say "vice-a versa"?

My grandmother once told me that if you're really quiet right at the time you were born, you can hear the number clicking over in your head. In retrospect, I think she said that so I'd shut the hell up and stop screaming around my birthday party. But do you know I can never remember to listen for the click? I always think, Crap. It's 6 p.m. I forgot the click.

It's also Ginger Rogers' birthday today. I'm certain we'll call each other.

I guess that's all I have to say about my birthday.

89 thoughts on “Sing with me now, this is 40 (four)!

  1. Um, June? You’ll probably like More.
    Happy Birthday! Stop by Ann Arbor and I’ll buy you a birthday cake or something.

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  2. Well, here’s to a belated Happy Birthday June!!! I’ve been in my 40s for sometime now, and it’s not so bad. About that morning/night person thing? I must be the exception. I was born 6am, on my Mother’s birthday by the way. She liked to remind me each year that she missed being served breakfast that day in the hospital due to my timing. She did the next best thing, ate an entire layer of chocolate covered cherries out of the box my Dad brought her. So, anyways, I’m not a morning person, never have been.
    Hope your birthday travels are safe.

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  3. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! It gets ever better, honest! And your life is pretty darn great now, so fasten your seatbelt! Thank you, Marvin, for the great gift idea (Arthritis Today)! He could become known as The Great Marvini with all of his quirks, input, blog fodder, etc.

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  4. Happy birthday! Mine’s tomorrow, a fellow Cancer. I was born around 8:30, which I was told was the reason that was my bedtime as a child. Made sense at the time. But I’m a night owl, so maybe your theory holds water.

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  5. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
    (All caps isn’t annoying when you’re wishing Happy B-Day, is it?)
    I just found your blog a week ago and think you are funny as hell.
    Hope you got to hear the number click this time around. πŸ™‚

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  6. Happy Birthday!
    This just reaffirms my decision not to be on Team Marvin. The bathroom hogging alone is annoying, but making arthritis jokes too? Apparently someone does not want to get laid tonight.

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  7. Happy Birthday Sparkley Rose Blossom! Ya know, I was born at like 3 PM and I totally agree with the whole morning birth morning person thing. I am not now, have never been, nor am I likely to ever be a morning person.

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  8. Happy Day of Birth, Junay!
    Because my birthday is the second of the month, I claim the ENTIRE month as my own. Yes, there is cake every day. Not as much luck with the daily presents, but I am working on it.I’ve got you by several years. Forties, pheh! I’m shooting for FIFTY! The goal is not to be as young as possible, but as OLD as you can get! Forty-four? Did that years ago…
    Cake at 4:52. But no singing. Only a moment of silence or you won’t be able to hear the click.

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  9. Happy Day of Birth, Junay!
    Because my birthday is the second of the month, I claim the ENTIRE month as my own. Yes, there is cake every day. Not as much luck with the daily presents, but I am working on it.I’ve got you by several years. Forties, pheh! I’m shooting for FIFTY! The goal is not to be as young as possible, but as OLD as you can get! Forty-four? Did that years ago…
    Cake at 4:52. But no singing. Only a moment of silence or you won’t be able to hear the click.

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  10. Happy Day of Birth, Junay!
    Because my birthday is the second of the month, I claim the ENTIRE month as my own. Yes, there is cake every day. Not as much luck with the daily presents, but I am working on it.I’ve got you by several years. Forties, pheh! I’m shooting for FIFTY! The goal is not to be as young as possible, but as OLD as you can get! Forty-four? Did that years ago…
    Cake at 4:52. But no singing. Only a moment of silence or you won’t be able to hear the click.

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  11. I feel so honored to be mentioned in this special birthday edition of your blog.
    Happy Birthday, June!

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  12. Happy Birthday you little whippersnapper you. I don’t mean that you are a dominatrix and Marvin is your “subject” unless of course you are. Then I wish you lots of assless black leather chaps and stilleto knee boots.
    Ball Gags for everyone!
    Happy Birthday

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  13. I shall have to find out when my morning person husband was born, because I was born at 10:28 PM and that’s right around the time I hit my peak working hours. Or it was, before I had to conform to the rest of the world and their brilliant idea that the workday should start at 7:30 am.
    Happy birthday June! And remember, if it’s YOUR birthday cake, there are no calories in it. Fact.

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  14. i HATE it when people say vice-a-versa. I even hate you just for referencing you. But I will be respectful; ‘honour your elders,’ my dad always said.

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  15. Happy birthday, June! πŸ™‚ I hope you have a day where all your subjects and verbs agrees, where everyone uses their punctuation right; and that no one ends a sentence with a preposition in.

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  16. Happy Birthday June! I turned 45 on July 5th at 12:15 am. I missed Independence Day by 15 minutes, darn. I share my birthday with PT Barnum. Being a girl, that never really thrilled me. I can easily stay up until 2 or 3 in the morning. Thanks to your theory I now know why.
    If you were me, you would be making your husband take you out for a really nice dinner, but since you are not me, I hope you have fun doing whatever you want!

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  17. Happy Day of Birth, June!
    I hope all your co-workers gathered ’round the water cooler to sing to you!

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  18. Happy Birthday, lovely June Gardens! I hope your day is wonderful! I think you should get to punch Marvin 44 times.
    P.S. Not to bust your theory or anything, but I was born at 3:26am (sorry Mom), and I am definitely NOT a morning person.

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  19. happy birthday!
    my nurse friend’s theory is that you are born in the time slot of whence thee was conceived. πŸ˜‰

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  20. Happy Birthday!!! Or as my former boss used to say “Happy Birfday”. It always amazed me that somebody who made that much money could be incapable of using a ‘th’ sound.
    I’m afraid I skipped becoming my mother and went straight to becoming my grandmother. The proof? I like More magazine. I have for several years. I’ll be 40 in 3 years. Oprah Magazine? Love that one, too!
    I’ll make a special toast to you at today’s 4:52 glass of wine.

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  21. Happy Birthday, June. Personally, I believe turning 44 (or even FORTY-FOUR) beats the alternative. Just ask (deceased) Ginger Rogers when you talk to her today (or not).
    I don’t know what time of day I was born, but my mother never failed to remind me I was a month late. But I’ve been very punctual ever since I turned FORTY-FOUR.

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  22. Happy Birthday June! I think that this is the year you should train Marvin to tell you, “happy birthday” each day at 4:52. I have a November birthday. My husband has to tell me happy birthday twice a day. =) And dude, O has the best book recommendations. I’m never giving it up. But I do hide it under a stack of Vogues.

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  23. Happy Birthday. I was born at lunchtime (I know this because my mother never missed an opportunity to point out that the anesthesiologist was at lunch and unavailable at the crucial moment), and I do like me some lunch.
    Oh, and I love Marvin. I may just have to be on his team.

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  24. Happy birthday! πŸ™‚ I hope something delightful is waiting for you at 4:52, and I don’t mean Depends.
    I’m so a night person. I was born at 1:09 am. My dad was watching Saturday Night Live laughing Eddie Murphy skits (I can imagine they were hilarious) while my mom was, well, you know.

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  25. Happy birthday! πŸ™‚ I hope something delightful is waiting for you at 4:52, and I don’t mean Depends.
    I’m so a night person. I was born at 1:09 am. My dad was watching Saturday Night Live laughing Eddie Murphy skits (I can imagine they were hilarious) while my mom was, well, you know.

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  26. Happy birthday! πŸ™‚ I hope something delightful is waiting for you at 4:52, and I don’t mean Depends.
    I’m so a night person. I was born at 1:09 am. My dad was watching Saturday Night Live laughing Eddie Murphy skits (I can imagine they were hilarious) while my mom was, well, you know.

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  27. Happiest of birthdays! Here’s a recipe for a great birthday: buy yourself something completely overly-indulgent and gorge yourself on cake. It’s all downhill from here anyway. πŸ˜‰

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  28. Ah, 44…it was a very good year. I hope yours give you everything you richly deserve. Beginning with Blogger of the Year, which I know you already know whether you won or not and can’t say, but irregardless (I know how much you love that word) you deserve anyway. I wonder what grammar-check would do with that sentence…

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  29. Happy Birthday. Today I felt the world lurch to revolve around you.
    I was born at 6 AM. I’m definitely NOT a morning person. My mom pushed for two hours and they used forceps to get me out. I’m thinking I was not overeager to be making my entrance at the crack of dawn.

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  30. Look, June, Look!
    Look who learned how to post!
    I was born at 12:00 a.m.
    I guess that means I go both ways?
    Happy Birthday!

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  31. I am wishing you the happiest of all your birthdays so far! I hope you feel all the love and good wishes that are sent to you from all the people you entertain on a daily basis. Personally, I don’t know how to start a day without June anymore.
    May the birthday fairy shower you with sparkly things, chocolate, Topamax and all your favorites! Enjoy the day.

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  32. Happy Birthday, my dear Junie!
    I already sent you emails, so this is just a quick birthday wish!
    Thanks for making all of us giggle every day!
    Love & a hug,

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  33. Happy Birthday! I recently became a regular reader of your blog and have enjoyed every darn second – even when I don’t know what you’re talking about. But 44th birthday I get…been there, done that. Hope it’s a good one!

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  34. Good lord, Clarence Clemmons got new knees and it made the front cover. We’re mere minutes from Bruce Springsteen going in for new hips.
    Happy Birthday!

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  35. Happy Birthday at 4:52! You are a mere child, a baby, a toddler at best!
    I will hit the BIG 5-0 in February. Not happy about it! NOT AT ALL! I DO NOT want to have a surprise 50th party! I HATE those!
    Eat lots of cake! Birthday cake, white on white is my FAVORITE food period!!
    Lou Cinda πŸ™‚

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  36. What happens if you were born at 2:11 a.m.? Does that count as morning or night? Apparently, I’m sleeping through my most productive and perky hours. Maybe my middle-of-the-night genius just needs an outlet! Does anyone know where I could get a job at an all-night truck stop or as a nighttime DJ?
    Also, happy birthday June! I hope 44 leaves you wanting more. (That’s more fun birthdays, not necessarily More magazine. Really, I just wanted to rhyme.)

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  37. I love birthdays, no matter what the number. And remember when Jamie Lee Curtis posed for MORE magazine without any makeup or supportive clothing?
    I occasionally read Oprah and Martha Stewart when I want to feel inadequate.

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  38. Happy Birthday to you! You are one of my favorite people in the world. Have fun today, maybe have some fattening lunch with Tank and Hammy. Eat cake.
    You are correct with your theory. I was born at 10:?? at night and am a night owl. Don’t like mornings at all.
    And… Will Ferrell’s birthday is also today. And Corey Feldman. After you and Ginger talk, why not make plans for dinner with Will and Corey?

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  39. My mom told me I was born during “As the World Turns”.
    Which means I have a lot of cheesey drama in my life.
    With some really hot guys who have cool names. And who die mysterious deaths, haunt the living, and then come back to life 5 years later just before I say my wedding vows.
    And then leave me hanging on the cliff.
    Happy Birthday. I hope you hear the click.

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  40. Thanks, everyone! And whoever sent me the singing birthday card from Barry Gibb? Heart heart heart you!!

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  41. Happy Birthday! I was born at 11:35 pm and am a total night owl, so I love your theory, I’m going to put it forth to my friends and see what they come up with.
    enjoy “More”. I love “More”, I read it at the periodontist. Cuz, you know, that’s where all us old folks go for fun (I’m 10 months older than you…).

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  42. Happy Birthday, June! And to keep on supporting your theory, I was born at 10 p.m., and I am definitely not a morning person. I always got a second wind around 10 p.m. when I was younger. Now, not so much. But I still like to sleep late! (It’s my birthday this Sunday, but I’m going to be 57. Why does that sound sooo old, when compared to 44? Why can’t I remember being 44? Yikes. I’ve made this all about me.)
    June, happiest of birthdays. You give a lot of joy to this old lady!

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  43. 44 was Reggie Jackson’s number. Further proof that I only remember stuff that has NO bearing on my life whatsoever! Enjoy your day!

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  44. I agree with your theory. I was born at 11:58pm and I am SOOOO not a morning person.
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JUNE! You’re the age of a really big bra.

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  45. to say something sentimental or something rude & crass… it’s always a toss up! i’ve got a call in to my mother to see what time i was born because my favorite time of day is not day, it’s 10:13 pm.
    Happy Happy Birthday- so glad i found your blog!
    You have permission to punch Marvin!
    ~misschell

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  46. Happy Birthday June. I hope you enjoy 44. I have been 44 for 10 months and 10 days. It has just been another year for me. Nothing excitng.
    I hope you like MORE magazine but it didn’t do anything for me. I am much happier with Ladies Home Journal and Good Housekeeping.
    Have a great day!

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  47. I will turn 47 in September. I was born at 5:00-ish a.m. and am a morning person so I guess your theory is right. I loooove MORE magazine. Enjoy your day!

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  48. Did this happen to you? I swear, the exact DAY AFTER I turned 40, everything got blurry. Like somebody switched my lenses from my regular prescription to Mr. McGoo’s. We went out to celebrate that night but it wasn’t all that fun because the music was TOO DAMN LOUD!!
    I’m serious. Overnight. Like God flipped a switch and then sat back and laughed…
    Happy Birthday, Junie. I will be 43 on Sunday at 7:11AM…doubt I will hear the click…maybe some ringing…WILL SOMEONE ANSWER THE DAMN PHONE?!?!?

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  49. Remember you get to eat anything you want to today.
    Have a most happy and healthy and all good things!

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  50. LOVE that you used a U2 song as a title. My fave! LOVE that I’m the first comment! It’s all about pleasing me today. Until 4:52pm. Then, it’s all you and and your birthdayness. Have a great day!!!! Happy Birthday!

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