Don’t be tardy for Tank’s party

Last night my friend Tank, the miracle angel baby, had a party. It was his birthday. So I guess you could say he had a birthday party.

See how I can put two and two together, there?


Here is me and my cleavage on the way to Tank's party. Why didn't Marvin tell me I was flashing the girls so much? And I'd like to thank him for shooting me at this angle, so you can enjoy my lack of jawline.

Anyway, the invitation said no gifts, but I ignored that. However, this bag is from Anthroplogie, and I assure you I did not get Tank a frilly blouse or perfume from Anthropologie. His gift was totally from Target.

At any rate, Tank has many interesting friends and a really cute dog named Shug and we had a good time. Except for the part where Marvin gets sleepy at around 9:30. I made him stay until 11:11. That's what time it said in my car clock.

I just wanted to brag that I had a car clock. I know you can't even stand how advanced I am.

Did I ever tell you the story about when my father was on the painkiller? We were both living in LA and he called me to say he wasn't feeling right and he dashed down to the ER. Which, you know, I go to the ER like four times a year, but for him it was really a thing.

I can't even remember what was wrong with him now, but it was not serious enough that they kept him, but they'd given him a strong painkiller and they said he had to leave his car there and I had to drive him home.

"I'm FINE," my father insisted, and he did live like a quarter of a mile from the hospital. But I said let's just do what the medical professionals say, and we could get his car later. "This is ridiculous," he grumbled. "I'm perfectly okay."

We got him checked out and into my car, and in my car is a temperature thingie and the clock.

"OH MY GOD! It's 840 degrees out!" said my father, who was getting in the car at 8:40 p.m.

Fortunately, I did not leave Tank's house in that particular state of mind, and I knew it was 11:11 and not 1,111 degrees outside.

Oh, but before I go, how on earth am I going to award a comment of the week after everyone made me pee my own self with their "Hulk married his mom" comments? So, this week's special (go click on it at right, there) is a compilation of all the beautiful things we had to say to Hulk. About marrying his mom. Cause we're all nice that way.

23 thoughts on “Don’t be tardy for Tank’s party

  1. Gladys – you’ve gotten it! The 31 year-old blonde drag-queen lady from Real Housewives is HULK’S MOTHER!!!!!!
    Hulk is Big Poppa!
    Mystery solved.
    Did you all miss me while I was away in California? I missed some good stuff! Congratulations, Hulk!
    And, congratulations Junie on finishing up your job!


  2. One of our local radio dj’s here in Atlanta is dating that horrible Atlanta housewife. Did you know that she claims to be 31? Obviously she doesn’t know how to count either.


  3. I know I’m a little late to the party, so to speak, but I really wanted to say thanks for coming to my party, June! It was like having a movie star come over! A hilarious, foxy, movie star!. You looked great (of course) and Marvin was a real sport! I hope you had as much fun as I did. And just between us, the frilly blouse and perfume are perfect!


  4. Post Script: I so hear Kim (as in Real Housewives of Atlanta) singing “don’t be tardy for the party…”
    Hey you don’t suppose Hulk is Big Poppa do you?


  5. You look phab-you-less! Also and too I one time was given some really good cough syrup and decided to drive myself to work. I took said cough syrup, got into my car and realized that I was driving at a very slow rate of speed. How, you ask, did I realize this? When the police officer asked me if I knew how fast I was going and I said 15 mph. I had looked at my display that told me I was getting 15 mpg. 🙂
    I wonder if I still have some of the good cough syrup.


  6. I gotta tell ya June, when the picture came up of you on the way to the party, I was all like “HUBBA, HUBBA!!”
    See SueWis, this is an example of sarcasm on June’s blog.
    No really, …Oh forget it, you’ll never believe me now. 🙂
    BTW, thanks for shopping at the Target.


  7. See? You are keeping up with your friendships from your old job. See? They haven’t forgotten you.
    How is Tank? Tell him happy birthday. Did the press come out to cover the MAB’s most recent birthday?


  8. You know, it’s really not fair. I’ve seen maybe ONE episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, but it just happened to be the one where the drag queen lady was recording that single. And now I can’t get it out of my head. Blugh.


  9. Hi, yeah…remind me Junie some time to NOT tell you the story about how one night I ran into an aquaintence I hadn’t seen in a while. And asked her how her boyfriend Skip was doing. And how she, while her friends looked on in horror, replied, “Skip died.”


  10. I was just wondering if you have any friends named “Tiny” or “Peanut” or if you are only attracted to Hulks and Tanks.


  11. I was just wondering if you have any friends named “Tiny” or “Peanut” or if you are only attracted to Hulks and Tanks.


  12. I was just wondering if you have any friends named “Tiny” or “Peanut” or if you are only attracted to Hulks and Tanks.


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