You ain’t nothin’ but a hound dog. With gas.

I would have slept in later, but Tallulah had gas. You know how they sell those alarm clocks that just flash brighter and brighter light at you? They could totally make a Tallulah-ate-part-of-my-barbecue-last-night alarm.

So I never did get any work yesterday, which naturally makes me think I will NEVER get any work and we will die impoverished and have to eat the cats. Someone I am Facebook friends with asked me to proof some of her stuff and then balked when I actually wanted to charge her for it. "Oh, no, that's okay. I can just do it."

I mean really, what are people thinking? Oh, she's jobless now! She has time to take her 12 years of experience and work for me for free!

At any rate, I did take my 12 years of experience and head on out to the Old Time Pottery yesterday, which if you live in the Greensboro area you MUST go, and I got me some apothecary jars for my eggsaladgere shelf in the bathroom. And no. I am not taking pictures of it. Because you know what? This may come as a shock, but once 67 people start commenting on all your stuff? It gets kind of irritating.

I got FOUR jars for $20. Heart me. I put soap in one, QTips in the other, and I forget what's in the other two but it's cute cute cute. Faithful Reader KW in Atlanta was the one who suggested it. What would we all do without Faithful Reader KW in Atlanta?

Then finally, I ended my day in an Elvis way. Every night when I'd drive home from work, I'd pass this little bar-and-grill-looking place:

Brightwood
Places like this are right up my alley. You can tell it's old and been there forever and probably has characters in it. I always wanted to stop in one day after work but was kind of nervous about being a woman alone at what could be just a bar. I didn't want to end up like Jodi Foster on the pinball machine.

Fortunately, one of my coworkers was curious about the place too, and she told me Elvis had eaten there once, in 1954! Well, then I was obsessed. I HAD to go there. The coworker and I planned three different times to meet up there after work and every time our plans got screwy. So finally last night, even though we no longer work together, we met there.

Junewelvis
You know how I have that friend, the other June, and she hates to be photographed? So does THIS friend, and I know you think I go out and do this stuff by myself and I just pay waitresses to take my picture.

But get this. Our waitress last night? WAS THE WAITRESS WHO SERVED ELVIS IN 1954! Seriously! She has worked there for FIFTY-NINE years! And I know I am capping all the time but COME ON! She works there seven days a week, 12 hours a day. I am not making this up.

Elvis
Here is the booth where Elvis sat. He ordered a hamburger with lettuce and tomato and a glass of milk. He also ordered an orange cat.

And everyone I've told so far says, "He didn't order a drink?" but you know, Elvis wasn't a big drinker. He was just a pill person.

Anyway, I'm glad we had this talk. If you're ever in the Greensboro area, after you go to Old Time Pottery, get over to the Brightwood Inn because it is way cool. I mean, knotty pine! Elvis! Milk! What more do you need?

Maybe I should start blogging for the Greensboro Chamber of Commerce.

49 thoughts on “You ain’t nothin’ but a hound dog. With gas.

  1. I once went to the Bull & Finch Pub in Boston, which is the inspiration for the TV show “Cheers”. The outside is the same, but the inside is different. Spent the night exchanging one-liners with Norm Peterson (Cristy!!), until I realized he was a talking statue.
    Don’t you hate it when people try to one-up your “Brush With Greatness” stories with one of their own?? I mean, who cares about dumb ol’ Elvis…

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  2. Aw, Elvis next to that cutie kittie. Cute! Glad you and your imaginary ex-co-worker-fellow-adventurer finally checked that place out. Since you haven’t gotten any paying jobs yet we will just have to keep you practiced up by writing with our usual goodly grammar.

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  3. Here’s something to one up you on your Elvis dealy do: My husband’s father sold cars to Elvis. All the time. Seriously.
    I’ve done a lot of free-lance work for Graceland. They’re very picky about protecting the brand. I once put a quote on a piece and they said it made him look too dead. Seriously.
    And the funny Elvis spoof stuff? They HATE it. Seriously.
    But I live in Memphis. Elvis ate everywhere, so my degrees of separation are practically nil. I can throw a burger and hit something Elvis.

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  4. Here’s something to one up you on your Elvis dealy do: My husband’s father sold cars to Elvis. All the time. Seriously.
    I’ve done a lot of free-lance work for Graceland. They’re very picky about protecting the brand. I once put a quote on a piece and they said it made him look too dead. Seriously.
    And the funny Elvis spoof stuff? They HATE it. Seriously.
    But I live in Memphis. Elvis ate everywhere, so my degrees of separation are practically nil. I can throw a burger and hit something Elvis.

    Like

  5. Here’s something to one up you on your Elvis dealy do: My husband’s father sold cars to Elvis. All the time. Seriously.
    I’ve done a lot of free-lance work for Graceland. They’re very picky about protecting the brand. I once put a quote on a piece and they said it made him look too dead. Seriously.
    And the funny Elvis spoof stuff? They HATE it. Seriously.
    But I live in Memphis. Elvis ate everywhere, so my degrees of separation are practically nil. I can throw a burger and hit something Elvis.

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  6. Please don’t leave us with that unorganized picture, we need to see the finished product. I won’t comment.
    I can’t watch those clean house shows unless I know I’m going to see the end.

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  7. I love Old Time Pottery and have been known to make a special trip to G-boro to go there. Now that you’re unemployed, I’ll holler at you and we can go together.
    I promise not to talk about your Q-tips.

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  8. You could there. I came out of there smelling like the Marlboro Man. Speaking of which, did anyone see the Pioneer Woman was featured in Southern Living this month? What magazine will feature me? Slovenly Living. Bad CupBoards Living. Worried About Not Living. Okay, kind of love myself for that last one.

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  9. Oh my goodness. I had put Jodi Foster and the pinball machine out of my head. Thank you for bringing that back.
    And 59 years???? Good grief! If she was 18 when she started, she’s older than my parents. Isn’t she ready to retire??? Does she eat there? She must–12 hours a day. Maybe the food is a fountain of youth.
    Unless you get the side of pill, of course.

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  10. I had something totaly witty to say when the guy who reads our gas and electric meter pounded on the back door like I might be in the west wing of our cape cod house. Dude scared the hElvis right out of me.
    You’re lucky Tallulah doesn’t know how to pull the “dutch oven” on you with that gas.

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  11. BTW, Beth and I watch Jeopardy about three times a year when we are feeling too smart for our own good, and we actually knew an answer last night because of your blog.
    They wanted to know a 6 word song title that contained the line you used on your answering machine from The Wizard of Oz. Answer, Ding, Dong, the Witch is Dead. Thanks for helping us know a final jeopardy answer.

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  12. Well Hulk, I lived a block from there for two years.. and all you tourists, asking me to take your picture in front of the sign with the finger pointing downstairs, or getting pissed when I walked through their picture.. it got a little old. I started walking on the sidewalk on the other side of the street.
    Now you’re one-upped too. And grumped at, which is characteristically Boston and probably means it’s time for me to move soon.
    So there.

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  13. To add to the Elvis bragging…. My parents took me to Graceland when I was 8 (’cause what 8 year old DOESN’T want to wander through a house full of things she can’t touch and reflect on her Vegas Days of booze and chicken [that’s for you, Furry] and hookers and blow [Paula]?)……anyway- who got lost and found herself in Lisa Marie’s playroom??? I did not, however, think it was cool when my mother came to collect me from the “security office” and chewed my butt. I will say this…. I’d do it again in s minute…

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  14. Has anyone else noticed that a certain someone is suspiciously absent lately. Must have spotty internets service at the honeymoon destination.

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  15. Short-staffed at work because of hunting season, D-Lish…Effing sucks having to actually WORK instead of entertaining everyone.
    ‘Course, even Elvis took a break during the solos, didn’t he?

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  16. Sorry to hear that Hulk. a break during the solos…geesh. Crapola I’d be in big trouble if I actually had to work while I was at work…

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  17. Jodie Foster thing… I believe it was actually a pool table that, interestingly enough, or disgustingly enough, happened in my hometown (maybe 2 miles from my house). Thankfully, I was 5 in 1983 so I don’t remember the details from the news and such.
    Why didn’t you get a picture with the old waitress? I mean, she’s gotta be like 80 years old and still waiting tables which is crazy.

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  18. well if i was ever gonna stalk someone it might be furry godmother…cuz…like i heart elvis. we were born on the same day. so in january when you hear all the elvis tunes on the radio and they say “today elvis would have been…” you can think of me. i still have ‘go to graceland’ on my bucket list. and i can see that juneness has ignored my request to blog twice a day to fill her unemployedness and entertain me. and june can we talk about “anyways”? drives me crazy.

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  19. We pretty much have to vacate the room when Tia-dog has gas. And I love how she jumps up and sniffs her own butt as if to say “how’d you do that?”.
    Here’s my second-or-third-hand brush with fame… My ex-sil knew a guy who had been given a car by Elton John. When she asked him to what he owed this largesse, he told her “Just look at it, baby…”. She said that from then on it was all she could do to not “just look at it” every time she saw him.

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  20. Elvis week in Memphis is great. All the look-a-likes, the candle light vigil and weird graffiti on the mortar of the brick wall surrounding Graceland. Plus, there is a tire store next door, cool neighborhood.

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  21. I find it amazing that people think we’ll edit for free. Maybe I should walk into a jewelry story and ask for a diamond for free…same thing. Love your blog.

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  22. Fur-ma, I was checking into the Peabody that week and while standing in line, after lowering my luggage to the florr, I straightened and observed the rest of the guests checking into the hotel. Wow, what great sideburns they all had, hmmm rather dark hair (dyed), but wait!, not speaking English, hmm, German, and male and female Elvis or Elvisees. Not the grocery store bagger in Saginaw that Juney knew as her hunk-a-hunk of burning love.

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  23. Lauren: I was also born on the day of the Pelvis!
    I have never been to Graceland, but I would like to. I felt sorry for the way his life turned out.
    June, boy you really hopped to it on those jars! Did you buy an extra large one for displaying your maxi pads?

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  24. So I know I’ve been remiss in reading, but why did you quit your job? (I went back several posts and got nothin’.)
    By the way, are you an AP or a Chicago Manual kind of gal?

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  25. Next time get a photo of the lady that has worked there for 59 years. She has to been a real sweet heart.
    Speaking of Elivs. One of my Mom’s best friends grew up in Tupelo and she knew Elivs and his entire family. They all grew up together in the same neighborhood. My Mom just shared that with me, and I must admit I was surprised that Polly knew the Presley family so well.

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