Romeo and Juliet. Except for the part where they like each other.

Marvin and I are meeting a friend at 10:00, so I asked him to set the alarm at 8:00 so I could get my bouffant in working order and such. When the alarm came on, Marvin made every song into something about the dog, who he was holding, and who kept looking at me with pleading eyes.

HimomFirst he sang, "I'm alive! And my dog shines on me today. I'm alive!"

Then, "I will follow Lu if she'll follow me, all the days and nights that she knows will be…"

I got up during, "I never wanted, I never wanted to love a dog, the way that I want to love you."

Marvin tends to set the alarm to radio stations he doesn't want to listen to, so he'll have the impetus to get up. His ridiculous love of the dog is all I needed to bolt out of bed.

And speaking of the animals, which I'm sorry to tell you is probably all I'll ever do now that I am home with them and they are my coworkers, we had animal drama last night.

As you know, I am proofreading a statistics textbook, and I have so far worked on it for 6.25 hours and have not even read page 1. Or page i, for that matter. So I'm sitting on my pink chaise lounge, which by the way was originally owned by Loni Anderson, and I know you are impressed by my access to the big stars, and this sentence is the longest sentence in the history of time.

When I work on my pink lounge chair, Francis ALWAYS sits on it with me. That's just the way it is, Walter Cronkite, and 13 years of us doing that is not going to change just because some dreaded DOG now loves me too.

I have not really worked in that pink chair since we got Lula, so she was not abreast of the situation, see.

So I'm proofreading, Francis is on my legs, and Tallulah walks in.

Tallulah and Francis are not what you'd call pals. They are Hatfield and McCoy. They are Sarah Palin and Obama. They are Captain Kangaroo and the ping-pong balls. Remember how Bunny Rabbit would make those ping-pong balls fall from the sky? And they really went to town naming THAT character, by the way. Bunny Rabbit.

So they hate each other. Is what I'm telling you. When Lu was a puppy, Francis let that poor creature know, in VERY POINTED TERMS, that she was not to mess with Francis. Tallulah goes to great pains to look at everything in the room except Francis, just to avoid a confrontation.

But there I was, hour after hour, sitting there with that…that…enemy, and Tallulah couldn't stand it. She wouldn't come up near the top of my chair to let me pet her. She was too afraid. So instead she did this:


for about an hour and 15 minutes. And every time she started a new "Rrrrrooooo," Francis would say, "Hsssssssssssssssssss! GrrrrrrOOOOOOOOORRRRrrrrrr" back.

So that was relaxing, and not at all like I was trying to proofread during an est seminar. I really have no idea if people chanted during est meetings. I kind of just wanted to say est.

Anyway, finally Tallulah's deep and abiding love for me, and also her jealousy, overrode her fear of the Fran. Which is saying something, because even I am a little afraid of the Fran. But she slowly, and not all all distractingly (which is certainly a word), got on my lap.

Looks comfy, doesn't it? And so easy to read around! And I wasn't at all nervous that there'd be a dog/cat fight eight centimeters from my face.

Believe it or not, we all worked like this for at least an hour. I worked on statistics, and Fran and Lu worked on who was coming out on top in this eternal struggle.

Okay, I am leaving now. Am done talking about my pets.

I'm too shiny to talk about.

31 thoughts on “Romeo and Juliet. Except for the part where they like each other.

  1. I’m sure my (3) readers are sick of hearing about Punkerton (the cat, Punk) too, but do I care? No. He is the light of my life (Don’t tell my husband I said that… but if you do, maybe I’ll have a big fight to blog about. hahahaha)
    cuz who wants to hear about TheDerangedWeasel I work for?!?!


  2. Loved the photo of Sir Henry. Looks like a professional photographer took it with the back lighting and all.
    I’m sure Fran still is the alpha animal and if poor Lula crosses the line dear Fran will let her know immediately. Obviously, Lula didn’t cross the line piled on top of your head.
    I loved Captain Kangaroo, even as an adult. I must agree Bunny Rabbit wasn’t very creative for a name for that rabbit.


  3. HEY!!! I changed my name before I commented but it changed it back. Great! I’ll always have the WKRP moniker.


  4. Jan~ who wondered, wondered whatever became of Beth...She's livin' on the air in Cincinnati, Cincinnati, WKRP. says:

    OK, Paula H&B… I’ll admit it… I saw New Moon not once, but twice, in 24 hours. Yes, I am one of those Twilight people. I went to the 12:15am showing and then took my daughter to the 7:00pm showing. I even had on my Team Jacob shirt. Yes, I’m 16.


  5. “… meeting a friend at 10:00 …” Is that code for “Going to see that Twilight movie but too ashamed to admit it?”


  6. “… meeting a friend at 10:00 …” Is that code for “Going to see that Twilight movie but too ashamed to admit it?”


  7. “… meeting a friend at 10:00 …” Is that code for “Going to see that Twilight movie but too ashamed to admit it?”


  8. Jan~ who wondered, wondered whatever became of Beth...She's livin' on the air in Cincinnati, Cincinnati, WKRP. says:

    Thank you, Beth!


  9. Why does Lu suddenly fear
    Everytime Fran gets near
    Just like me
    They long to be
    Close to you.
    Now, there’s a real bad 70s kinda song. After a day of bagging leaves, I am ready for some wine and primal scream therapy.


  10. Henry looks like he could be the Cullens’ cat. That’s a Twilight reference, FYI. And the vampires in Twilight are sparkly, like Henry, in that picture. See? There was a point here.


  11. I love Marvin’s radio trick, except with my luck I’d have some wretched song like “I Believe I Can Fly” stuck in my head all day and want to stab my ears. Uh oh. Just the mere thought of that song, and now its stuck on a continuous 8-track loop. I need Drano for the ears.


  12. OH, my! Lu is so adorable. She loves her momma sooo much she risked life and limb to be near you! Is Frannie losing his touch?(Or claw?!!)
    Adorable Hen-Hen picture!
    You could talk about your animals every ding and also dang day and I’d be riveted!


  13. And now he’s ticklin’ her fancy
    Rubbin’ her toes
    Muzzle to muzzle, now anything goes
    As they wriggle, and Talu starts to giggle
    Awww, gets me all urppy.


  14. That is a great picture of Henry. It’s almost like you are the daughter of a photographer.
    I wanted to be Loni Anderson when I was little. Not really Loni, more her character, Jennifer Marlowe on WKRP in Cincinnati. I wanted to be blond and buxom and beautiful, with a fabulous apartment and to appear ditzy but be really, really smart. And I wanted to be a secretary. So I, for one, am jealous of your pink chaise lounge formerly belonging to Loni. I would like to know the story of how you came to own it. Garage sale at Loni’s while you were in L.A.???


  15. First let me say that Talu is so cute and relatively compact on your lap. Then let me say that the every color of the seventies back of Roseanne’s couch granny square blanket is AWESOME!
    Also, let’s not forget Dancing Bear and Grandfather Clock on the Captain’s show. Captain Kangaroo I mean. Not Captain and Tenille. Because I’m sure that when Toni Tenille was singing this morning about never wanting to love a man that way that she wanted to love The Captain, she did not mean Captain Kangaroo. Or did she?


  16. Henry’s picture made me “aw” out loud. 🙂
    Did you know that est is still around? And it’s called The Forum. And I had someone heavily pressuring me to go for the last year. I was told that it is “uh maze ing”. Craziness.


  17. When I was a child, I watched Captain Kangaroo every morning before I walked to school. And I walked home for lunch every day and watched Soupy Sales. RIP, Soupy. And I had a little white bunny rabbit that I named Thumper. Life seemed a little more straightforward then.


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