Greetings from my lack of personality

Decaf June is here.

Maybe I'll have to become one of those people who puts "LOL" after everything they say so you know it was supposed to be funny. LOL.

I would like to find the person who invented LOL. And I would like to beat him or her about the head and shove toothpaste up his or her nose holes. Then you know what I would do? I would LOL.

Anyway.

I went to my yoga class yesterday, my free yoga, I would like to add, and it was yoga-riffic. See? See what happens when I have no caffeine? I start saying things like yoga-riffic. LOL.

Really, though, the whole class was dedicated to stretching one's back, and they had me do things to loosen up my neck and shoulders and it was unbelievable. I was hanging from the wall like a bug and lying with my neck curled back on a rolled-up yoga mat, and oh, you would not believe the things I did. Today my neck is 40 feet long.

I recognized the woman next to me and it was bugging me. I could not place her. Not that I was literally picking her up and trying to put her somewhere. Finally I asked her where I knew her from, and she said I looked familiar too, and anyway it turns out she works at dog day care. I had to tell her Tallulah was my dog and then she knew who I was.

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it. My friend Dottie loves it when I say that. Hey, Dottie! LOL!

I am trying to figure out what I hate more: LOL or when people say their kid is some age going on some age that is older. "Oh, she's three going on 19! LOL!" Do people think they are being original when they say this?

Decaf June is crabby June.

Speaking of crabby, my friend Jen, who is NOT crabby,  took a picture of Francis while she was here:

Fran

She was obsessed with Francis and his disturbed self. Fran did not know why anyone had to bother him, which is how I feel. Maybe Fran's entire issue is that he has no coffee.

I used a special photo developing process which gives us a glimpse into Francis's thoughts:

Murderfran
Do you wonder why I never pursued that art degree?

LOL.

Francis kind of has the expression Charles Manson has in that famous photo of him with the crazy eyes, doesn't he?

Charles franson

Oooo. Okay, this is creepy. FRANCIS JUST WALKED IN. He never walks in. He so brought his family with him to creepy-crawl my computer room.

Charles Franson.

Okay, so unless Francis cuts me to ribbons and writes the lyrics to Beatles songs on the wall in my blood, I will talk at you.

Oh, wait, before I go and get murdered, I am also getting my teeth whitened today at the hair salon. I know! Sounds safe. But for some reason they have teeth whitening and I thought it would be a good incentive, having nice, white coffee-free teeth.

You know what sounds good, though? Is some coffee.

LOL.

90 thoughts on “Greetings from my lack of personality

  1. Carla, on Planet Terra “no problem” does not mean “you’re welcome.” We say “you’re welcome” or “it’s my pleasure” because no problem is a no-brainer. That’s why I told my students that when they talk to each other, they can use the expression; when they talk to my customers or me, they have to use actual adult wording.
    I know that this will only get worse before it gets better, or else we will be seeing the next generation of mortgage bankers wearing flip flops to work and sporting multiple piercings.
    God, I need a cup of coffee. a big expresso.

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  2. I always take “no problem” to mean, “it was no trouble for me to do that for you”. Does “you’re welcome” make any more sense? You are welcome to what? I know it’s more formal, and I continue to use it and will insist that my kids do too, but I don’t see a problem with “no problem”.
    I never use shortcuts in my texts. I even punctuate correctly. As much as possible. I wouldn’t let an actual proofreader verify that statement.

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  3. I never thought about it that way, FG! Thanks for enlightening me! I have a worse habit than saying no problem, though. When people say thank you to me, I usually just say “uh huh.” Or, at work I say, “Thank YOU!”

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  4. Terra, I do so love the phrase, “It’s my pleasure.” It speaks of gentility.
    I always like to carry my own groceries to the car because I’m always looking to burn a few extra calories and I hate making awkward conversation with teenaged boys. The other day I had an older gentleman bagging my groceries. He asked me if he could help me out with them. I politely declined and then he said, “It would be my pleasure.” And I just melted. And we walked to the car together and had a lovely conversation because he was of the generation that knows how to do exactly that.

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  5. Terra & Carla… I wonder if it’s like when you translate things to another language and back to English and they get all screwed up because in French and Spanish, the “you’re welcome” equivalent is more like “it’s nothing,” which I don’t really like, cause sometimes it isn’t nothing, it’s something, and you shouldn’t have to verbally shrug off a thank you. I just have to learn more French and Spanish to figure out how to say something more like “it’s my pleasure.”
    Also, Steven Wright went to my alma mater. Which is actually kind of a big deal because no one went to Emerson. The only really famous people from my school are comedians: Dennis Leary, Jay Leno, the Fonz… Oh, and Bobbi Brown (makeup Bobbi Brown, not Whitney-beating, crackhead Bobby Brown, who incidentally is also from the Boston area, but I get the feeling he did not go to college..)
    I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he’s gone.

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  6. Joann, aw! Yeah, my generation has totally gotten away from that. I do know that Chick-Fil-A trains its employees to say “my pleasure” instead of “you’re welcome” because they are teaching it is a pleasure to serve others.

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  7. You know what I hate? Is what I hate is when people say 24/7 and it sounds like “twentyfourseven”.
    June thinks of coffee 24/7. LOL.
    And by the way, I’m 38 going on 16.

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  8. Katie,
    In Spanish you can also say “fue un placer” or “para servirle” which is very common. The first is “it was a pleasure” and the second means “I am here to serve you”
    I completely agree that you are welcome or It was my pleasure feels a lot better to say and to receive than no problem.
    I have never used lol or LOL. It irritates me. But I use wtf all the time.
    24/7 is one of my pet peeves. I truly hate that little turn of phrase.

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  9. Back to Friends, when Chandler had his…wenis report… and he had to hank out his wenis each week.

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  10. I just saw a Hyundai commercial that uses that Sound of Music song in it, and I got all riled up on BBP Commenters’ behalf, only I can’t remember now if the consensus was that we hate it or not.. I think it was that everyone hates the phrase, but it was a tie score on the song itself. I had never seen that commercial nor thought of that song in years, and then it pops up on my tv the day we talk about it.
    And then of course I had to come on here and tell everyone..

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  11. Chick-fil-A employees always give you a “it’s my pleasure”. Well, except our local Chick-fil-A had an employee that greeted us with “yo”. We shared that with the manager and that young man is now a former employee.
    June, maybe you should have tapered off on the coffee a bit slower stretching it out for a week or so. You have almost gone cold turkey.

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  12. Well…my youngest is in a phase where her main mode of communication is texting. She will talk verbally and can do so very well. She just prefers texting. So I had to make a choice. Will I or will I not engage her on the level she is at or demand to have it my way.
    So, yep, I text with her. A lot. Even in the same room.
    I think every generation has their “thing” they prefer and it’s the choice of the generation before to stay connected or not.
    My mom puts reading my blog and emailing me to the bottom of her list. Guess who would learn more about me if she would occasionally choose to related to me on my comfort zone?

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  13. Oh, I am laughing so hard.( I don’t do LOL)
    Don’t know how I found you, but you are hilarious.
    I’m here to stay…

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  14. Thanks for that. Now my friends and I who chat every day can no longer type LOL — instead we type – “I would type LOL but June has me self-conscious about it”. Sigh
    Oh and also? My son, who is 13 (which right there will explain what I am about to type) SAYS, LOL (pronounced lel).

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  15. Guilty of LOL!! And also excessive use of !!!
    However, I can’t stand when people use {{{hugs}}}. Is that not the gay-est thing?

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