Tom Saw-yer stupid documentary

Last night, Marvin forced friends of ours to come over and watch a Rush documentary.

I am not making this up.

Boneforlu
We took Tallulah to PetSmart and walked her up and down the aisles so she could pick out something chewy to keep her amused while guests were here. In truth, in the spirit of full disclosure, to be honest, etc., this was not the original choice. The thing she picked out was the size of that bone that tipped Fred Flintstone's car over. It was bigger than she is. And frankly, when she gets one of these bones? She is a jerk to the cats. They walk by, minding their own cat business, and she TAKES OFF after them to attack them for wanting her stupid spitty disgusting pig-parts bone.

It'd be like me flying to Hollywood right now and kicking Megan Fox's ass for wanting Marvin. She does not want his spitty pig-parts self. Okay, he's not made of pig parts. But he likes him some bacon. Hi, Marvin's Jewish mom.

Do you like how our calendar above reflects the correct date like a champ?

Momwoulddie
Anyway, not only did we force them to watch Rush, but we fed them take-out food. My mother is rolling over in her…well, she's alive, so she's merely rolling over. She's sitting in front of the computer, seeing this image of me feeding people takeout salad, falling to the floor of her den, and rolling over like one of her dogs. Maybe she's even making groany sounds like dogs do. "Roooarwwwwwww raooooarrwwwwwooooo…."

Do you like our skeleton hands we used for ice tongs? Need ice tongs, anyone who wonders what to get me for my birthday. I also need more Muget de Bois, found in Vermont Country Store catalog. And yes, I know Aunt Mary and mom have already sent me my birthday gifts three weeks before my birthday. But other, non-Rain Man relatives.

Worriedsick
While I ran around sticking skeleton hands in ice, Marvin worried himself sick.

Godot
Finally I was ready too so I just hung in the window like a giant loser and waited. Note I let my hair air dry in the humidity and yet it is smooth. SMOOTH! Who is happy with her chemical straightening process? So bad, I am.

Admire

You know what else I did while I sat in the window like a giant loser who had smooth hair? I admired our white bookshelves and blue walls. Happy with our changes.

Here

They're here!

Whatthatsmell

Wait, that food on table? Why everyone in here when there food on table?

Sniffy

Yes, definitely food. You going to eat? You not going to eat, Lu help out.

Winhungrytoo Winston also here. Can help with food problem.

Neither animal got to help with food problem, but you know what else they were unable to help with? Time problem. As in, they could not make it move faster than usual in order to speed that hideous documentary along.

Zzzzz

I mean, no one in Rush has sex addiction, or nearly died of a drug overdose, or anything. They just sing in that screechy voice and try to cram too many words into each line of their songs. And that documentary was TWO HOURS LONG.

Our guests left before it was over. What does that tell you?

Marvin is making me go to a Rush concert in September.

Someone is watching ALL OF SEASON FOUR of Sex and the City with me today.

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Author: June

At one point, I was sort of hot, in a "she's 27 and probably a 7" kind of a way. Now I'm old and have to develop a charming personality. Guess how that's going.

30 thoughts on “Tom Saw-yer stupid documentary”

  1. You used real plates and forks? You are a better hostess than me. I bust out all paper. Hence, my carbon footprint is some 339,994 miles wide.
    Did Marvin lift a finger?
    The hair—still stunning!

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  2. How, HOW, I ask, was someone able to make a 2 HOUR documentary about Rush? They aren’t that interesting. And I like Rush. But not enough to watch a 2 hour documentary.
    Muget de Bois, sigh. When I was a ‘tween, I loved that stuff. Glad to know that it’s still available through the VCS.
    P.S. I’ve completely failed at 30 Shrek. And I feel no shame admitting that, either.

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  3. That house looked way too clean! I am guessing you did something, Missy. Hmmm?
    Everything looked great. And the only sin about serving take-out food is if you try to pass it off as your very own. That’s not cool.
    Ask Marvin what happened to inviting people over for cards? or board games? or Twister?
    2 hours of Rush and I would have been DONE IN! for sure.
    p.s. I love Lula

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  4. That house looked way too clean! I am guessing you did something, Missy. Hmmm?
    Everything looked great. And the only sin about serving take-out food is if you try to pass it off as your very own. That’s not cool.
    Ask Marvin what happened to inviting people over for cards? or board games? or Twister?
    2 hours of Rush and I would have been DONE IN! for sure.
    p.s. I love Lula

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  5. That house looked way too clean! I am guessing you did something, Missy. Hmmm?
    Everything looked great. And the only sin about serving take-out food is if you try to pass it off as your very own. That’s not cool.
    Ask Marvin what happened to inviting people over for cards? or board games? or Twister?
    2 hours of Rush and I would have been DONE IN! for sure.
    p.s. I love Lula

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  6. That’s funny! The house looked beautiful, and beautifully clean – and I LOVE the white bookshelves and blue walls.
    Our dog, Lucy, always goes for the “dinosaur bones” too. And then gets all protective of the slimy, nasty thing. Stupid dogs.

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  7. Your hair looks pretty!
    I am always the one doing the cleaning before guests arrive. My husband wouldn’t care if we had potatoes growing out of the living room rug. Seriously! I guess I’d rather have that than some controlling creepo who needed everything to be perfect, right?

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  8. Your house and hair are so gorgeous and shiny! We are having people over for a bbq today, against my misanthropic will, and I just spent the morning cleaning the house/hating my family. In the process, I have managed to misplace one cat. Good thing I did the food prep yesterday is all I can say about that.

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  9. Your house and hair are so gorgeous and shiny! We are having people over for a bbq today, against my misanthropic will, and I just spent the morning cleaning the house/hating my family. In the process, I have managed to misplace one cat. Good thing I did the food prep yesterday is all I can say about that.

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  10. Your house and hair are so gorgeous and shiny! We are having people over for a bbq today, against my misanthropic will, and I just spent the morning cleaning the house/hating my family. In the process, I have managed to misplace one cat. Good thing I did the food prep yesterday is all I can say about that.

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  11. June, be careful with that bone. Once Talu starts to get it all slimey, the dye in the red bands will stain anything that it comes in contact with. My carpet looked as though someone or something had been dismembered.

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  12. Your house does look gorgeous, and I’m guessing that is thanks to you, and not Marvin and his Rush documentary.
    As you know, we are married to the same man. I don’t know if you saw my new dog pics, but I noticed that there are two guitars leaning against the wall in one of the pictures, which only confirmed to me that we are married to the same man. My husband’s current favorite DVD to watch is some Roger Waters thing. I think that he thinks that someday, Roger and David Gilmour are going to mend fences. I think by the time that happens, they’ll be pushed onto the stage in wheelchairs and have their personal nurses standing by, just in case. I’m not sure I’d care about a Pink Floyd reunion where everyone was 94 years old.
    P.S. LOVE YOUR HAIR!

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  13. The hair is looking fabulous still!
    I did the Shred two times yesterday because I crapped out Friday night. I was shocked by how much more stamina I had, and my husband did it along with me and quit before it was even half way over because his chest was going to explode.
    And I saw where Natalie cheated! Oh, Natalie. I want your bod.

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  14. At the risk of seeming vain and vapid for my unrelenting folicle obsession, your hair looks fantastic!! And the blue walls look terrific, too.

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  15. “she TAKES OFF after them to attack them for wanting her stupid spitty disgusting pig-parts bone” Laugh Out Loud cause I so related! Not that we have the cat problem but oh the spitty gross bones – dang they are all over the house but it’s the only way we get some peace and quiet sometimes from the dog.
    Your blue walls and white shelves are LOVERLY!

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  16. You house looks just lovely. Love the bookshelves and blue walls. My bet, you cleaned house. I don’t think there is anything wrong with having takeout food when you are having guests. At least you had friends over. I would have served on paper plates and plastic forks, they are so easy to wash.
    Your hair is so straight! It looks great.

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  17. Oh, I am so looking forward to the Rush documentary! But how did Marvin get it when it wasn’t supposed to be released on DVD until 6/29? I am counting the days. “There is unrest in the forest. There is trouble with the trees, for the maples want more sunshine and the oaks ignore their pleas…” Did they talk about Neal Peart’s daughter’s tragic death and losing his wife to cancer? It’s not drug rehab, but it’s drama. I’m guessing no.

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  18. June, I used to think it would be so fun to have you and Marvin as neighbors. I thought it would be a hoot to hang out with you guys at BBQs and holiday parties. Now, I’m not so sure. I can guarantee that I would have been snoring away on your couch after dinner if subjected to a Rush documentary.
    And my Jewish husband loves him some pork products, too.

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  19. Oh crap, I’m supposed to be doing the Shred, huh? Dang, forgot all about that nonsense. Sorry you had to watch Rush while I was watching Courtney Love (Behind the Music) talk about how she was the victim of em-bezz-la-ment. My, how I do love me some Courtney Love.

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  20. Oh! I almost forgot. My child was watching some godawful program (So You Think You Can Dance) and there is a woman on there who apparently is the “host” of said godawfulness, and she had gorgeous silky blonde hair and I thought, holy moses, that looks just like June’s new hair! So, yeah, you are totally happening with the hair.

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  21. I see nothing wrong with having company over for pizza. Plus, you glammed it up with salad and real plates. Sounds like a laid back, just have fun type of evening. Not sure about the documentary though, don’t think I could have watched the entire thing either. Oh… and the hair is absolutely gorgeous!! You must share exactly what type of treatment they did. I had the “thermal reconditioning” six years ago and it did NOTHING for the frizz! It would be so nice to be able to air dry and end up with hair that smooth!

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  22. You’re sick. By “sick” I mean, I totally adore you. Your books are arranged BY COLOR! I love it! Totally something I would do. And that means you’re sick. Very very sick.
    PS. I totally voted for you. You ALWAYS make me laugh.

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