Fat Dog Democrat

You know what I bet you wish? Which was a lovely, not-at-all convoluted sentence. I'll bet you wish I'd stop complaining about how much work I have to do. But as Randy on American Idol says every single time I've ever watched that show, which is like five times, check it.

I worked at my regularly scheduled job yesterday, got home at 6:15, and worked till 11:18 on the stupid, stupid, redunkulous freelance stuff I am still trying to get out of here from back when I was a freelancer.

I got up at 6:50 and stampeded back to my work, which I just finished and got on the computer to write this blog. In my email? The sex book lady has MORE PAGES FOR ME. HOW MUCH SEX IS THERE TO TALK ABOUT?

At any rate, by the end of August I should be caught up, so I will just be in this living hell of working like one of Thomas Edison's employees for another month.

Did you know Thomas Edison was a crappy employer? Made his people stay for days at work and so on. I know where they all wanted to put that light bulb.

This does not mean that I have forgotten about how I was gonna tell you that Tallulah got a little, you know, chubby. Got a little badonk-a-donk in her withers. Got a little secretary spread in her hind parts.

And you know I kind of noticed? I mean, she's part Pit Bull, right? So she has this big barrel chest which makes it easier to digest toddlers or something, and then she always had this dramatic swoop at the back where her tiny feminine waist was.

Catzz
I just tried to look for a good example of when she was slim, and instead I found this nice shot of the intimate bond that is my cats. Look how connected they are. Could they be acting more like they've never met each other?

Anyway. Trust me. Girlfriend had a dramatic waist. She was the Scarlet O'Hara of dogs.

Luroof
But then from November till this month, I have been home with her, which means she wasn't playing 10 hours a day at dog day care, and also too she was catching in her cute snout a scrap from everything I ate. And we all know what a health nut I am. Pop Tarts? Talu was getting a scrap. Fry? Catching it in midair.

I enjoy watching her catch her food when I throw it, and also it's cute when she chews. So it's all my fault.

And she literally ran around the entire.time. she was at day care. The owner there told me that other dogs go on the beds provided and hang out, but that Tallulah is the life of the party, constantly running eagerly from one dog to the next–as long as they're not, you know, small. You know how she gets about the small dog.

I am sorry. I did not raise her to be this way. Have you met my free-to-be-you-and-me childhood? Of course I didn't raise her that way. We are all equal equal equal. That's how I was raised. Everyone is wonderful, except for Republicans.

Well, I'm sorry mom, that WAS how I was raised. I had to work hard to embrace the Republican. And look at me now, embracing Faithful Reader and unbelievably conservative Hulk. Well. Not literally. 

Maybe little dogs are all Republican and Tallulah is catching some vibe from her grandma.

Have we already discussed this? Which dogs would be Democrats and which would be Republican? I think we did. I see Golden retrievers as Republican. I see mutts as Democrats.

Pit Bulls? Libertarians.

What say you?

Anyway. I was supposed to tell you other things and clearly I am never gonna get to them because I have to go to work. The POINT is, she looked a little junky in her trunky and sure enough, we took her for her shots this weekend and Talu has gained SIX POUNDS. She is only 20 inches tall, so, you know, six pounds isn't pretty.

And does anyone remember when Talu was thin, and I was so smug, and I lectured my mother about her fat dogs? Her giant Beagle (Republican) and her blue Healer (Independent)? Okay, but they are really fat. My vet said Talu was still acceptable, but last time she was ideal.

Ideal. Did you hear that? My dog was Megan Fox. Scarlet O'Hara and Megan Fox. My dog is a total self-centered bitch. Who marries David Silver, apparently.

So she has to eat two small meals now, in the morning and at night. And yesterday she went back to day care, and I cannot tell you how excited she was to get back there and roll on the floor and pee down her own leg in the lobby and so forth.

I'm talking about Megan Fox now. I have no idea what I'ma do with Tallulah.

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Author: June

At one point, I was sort of hot, in a "she's 27 and probably a 7" kind of a way. Now I'm old and have to develop a charming personality. Guess how that's going.

150 thoughts on “Fat Dog Democrat”

  1. Wow. what did i miss? holy cow. loved every word of this post and comments. laughed til i peed.
    ‘On fire’ doesn’t come close.

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  2. My dog definitely has memory and a sense of history and I assume most dogs do. Therefore, I don’t think any dog is stupid enough to be one of today’s Democrats. Today’s Democrats know nothing about history (real history – not the biased crap taught in today’s schools). Kennedy was a good Democrat who lowered taxes and stood for a strong America in the face of America’s enemies. Today’s Democrats have fallen for the Socialist BS, are embarassed by America’s success, want to bow to other nations and see a weaker America. Those who know history know that the greatest atrocities in history were caused by socialists. The most deaths by government of their own unarmed citizens (Democide is the coined term) in history were caused under Communist regimes (Soviet Union – 61 million – google Holodomor to get a taste, China – 38 million, Cambodia – 2 million, North Korea – 2 million, the list goes on and on). And the Nazi’s killed 21 million. Nazi = National Socialists, so don’t believe the BS that Nazis were somehow conservatives. Big government Democrats need to look at the history of big government and reconsider if that’s actually what you want. A government that is powerful enough to provide you with everything you want is strong enough to take everything you have, including your freedom and life. Time to join a tea party and understand why America became the greatest nation on earth in just over 200 years: because of freedom, not government force or wisdom (oxymoron if I ever heard one). The great innovations of the 20th century did not come from government decree, they came from free individuals pursuing their own self interest in the free market. Henry Ford and the automobile, Edison and the light bulb, Jobs and Gates and the personal computer (the list goes on and on), none of these things would have happened under a socialist regime. All of them improve our standard of living and make our lives easier. Yes, I don’t expect any dog to be dumb enough to be one of today’s Democrats, unless it was born yesterday and has no one there to teach it any true and real history…

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  3. You’re kidding, right, Seeker? ‘Cause communism and fascism aren’t the same either. Canada, Great Britain and France are all socialist governments. It’s about the state taking care of its citizens for one (health care, decent affordable housing, living wages, etc…). Free trade is allowed in a socialist government for another. My son-in-law works for the stock market in Canada.
    Christ! This is something most of us learn in high school… But for you, there is Google. Wow.

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  4. You’re kidding, right, Seeker? ‘Cause communism and fascism aren’t the same either. Canada, Great Britain and France are all socialist governments. It’s about the state taking care of its citizens for one (health care, decent affordable housing, living wages, etc…). Free trade is allowed in a socialist government for another. My son-in-law works for the stock market in Canada.
    Christ! This is something most of us learn in high school… But for you, there is Google. Wow.

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  5. You’re kidding, right, Seeker? ‘Cause communism and fascism aren’t the same either. Canada, Great Britain and France are all socialist governments. It’s about the state taking care of its citizens for one (health care, decent affordable housing, living wages, etc…). Free trade is allowed in a socialist government for another. My son-in-law works for the stock market in Canada.
    Christ! This is something most of us learn in high school… But for you, there is Google. Wow.

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  6. No, I’m actually new to this board and I do need to apologize because in re-reading my initial post, “stupid” was a little harsh. I should have said “misguided”. In any case, the fact that the failures of Communism are so overwhelmingly obvious (despite the best efforts of the New York Times and other media outlets to cover it up – google “Walter Duranty Ukraine” to get a taste) over the last 100 years, socialists have kept the movement alive by saying that they are not communists. Both socialism and communism are based on the principle that the goods and services produced in an economy should be owned publicly, and controlled and planned by a centralized organization. Everything else is just a socialist argument that has morphed over the years as communism’s failure could no longer be hidden. The key problem is that both require central control and both believe that private ownership is bad (some newly morphed socialists believe that some private ownership can be “tolerated”. This is due to the fact that the economic success of free market capitialism can’t be ignored and they want to tap into that revenue stream to keep their crumbling economic model a float a little longer).
    Central control is the problem. No government bureaucrat sitting in Washington can decide what we need better than us. We vote with our dollars every day in the free market. Companies that produce those goods and services which are of value to us and improve our lives will grow and others will fail as the dynamics of the economy changes (i.e. not many typwriter producers are in business today, but if gov’t run they would still be producing typwriters because the bureaucrat in charge of that dept would not want to lose their position or funding). In centralized control, the government decides where to spend resources and what to produce, and we have no choice in the matter. The lie to communism and socialism is that people act in their own self interest in a capitialist system (they call this “greed”) but that they won’t in a socialist system. That the person running the show will be an angel with no self interest. This basic trait of human nature doesn’t go away. We all want to improve our lives, only in a socialist system only the leaders have this ability. In Cuba Castro’s net worth is over $900 million while average Cubans live on $20 USD a month. In North Korea, Kim Jong Il orders Mercedes Benzs by the dozen and is the world’s largest importer of Hennesy’s cognac accroding to Forbes magazine. This, while 2 million of his people (10% of the population) starved to death in the 1990s and people are still starving there today. Read more at http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2010/jul/17/north-korea-famine-fears. In any case, I’m getting off topic. My dog is a Siberian Husky/German Shepard mix which gives her a curly tail and she’s incredibly friendly. Definitely not a someone that would use government force like socialists of all stripes do (Communists, Nazi’s, etc.)…

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  7. Castro (when he was head of state)was a dictator. He’s a communist. His brother has the post now. Also, communist. Kim Jong Il -dictator, communist. China -communist. All of these do not support an argument against socialism. Communism? Absolutely.
    Are you completely ignoring the socialist countries like great Britain and France because they do not support your thesis? Not communist. No dictator. If your baby gets sick, you take him to the doctor there without worrying about how much it will cost. Your argument is convoluted and misguided, not to mention vitriolic.
    Socialism is a way of more fairly distributing the wealth. Socialists do not want to take your house. They just think that everyone should have a house…
    And without a the bureaucrats spending our tax dollars, we would have no highway systems, parks, police systems, etc.
    Turn off the Fox News.

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  8. Castro (when he was head of state)was a dictator. He’s a communist. His brother has the post now. Also, communist. Kim Jong Il -dictator, communist. China -communist. All of these do not support an argument against socialism. Communism? Absolutely.
    Are you completely ignoring the socialist countries like great Britain and France because they do not support your thesis? Not communist. No dictator. If your baby gets sick, you take him to the doctor there without worrying about how much it will cost. Your argument is convoluted and misguided, not to mention vitriolic.
    Socialism is a way of more fairly distributing the wealth. Socialists do not want to take your house. They just think that everyone should have a house…
    And without a the bureaucrats spending our tax dollars, we would have no highway systems, parks, police systems, etc.
    Turn off the Fox News.

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  9. Castro (when he was head of state)was a dictator. He’s a communist. His brother has the post now. Also, communist. Kim Jong Il -dictator, communist. China -communist. All of these do not support an argument against socialism. Communism? Absolutely.
    Are you completely ignoring the socialist countries like great Britain and France because they do not support your thesis? Not communist. No dictator. If your baby gets sick, you take him to the doctor there without worrying about how much it will cost. Your argument is convoluted and misguided, not to mention vitriolic.
    Socialism is a way of more fairly distributing the wealth. Socialists do not want to take your house. They just think that everyone should have a house…
    And without a the bureaucrats spending our tax dollars, we would have no highway systems, parks, police systems, etc.
    Turn off the Fox News.

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  10. Furry GM, I wish you were kidding, but I’m sure you aren’t. My point is that Communism, Facism, and Socialism are all on the left, all requiring stong central government control and all believing that this strong government control over people’s lives is best. France, Britian, and Canada all have capitalist economies, not socialist. In fact, if you were paying attention you’d have noticed that France learned their lesson from going too far down the socialist track and have since turned back from the brink with the election of Nicolas Sarkozy who is a strong conservative and has started to roll back some of France’s socialism. Socialism does work on the back of capitialism, for a while…
    There are no absolutes, but countries should strive to make capitalism work better rather than move more and more towards socialism which does not work over time(even Sweeden changed to allow more private ownerships of business and the majority of businesses in Sweden are now privately owned).
    Capitalism with a dose of socialist safety nets does work and much better than a socialist economy with a dose of capitialsim. US Social security is a good idea, but it should have been kept in it’s own lock box and not added to the unified spending budget (which was what LBJ and the Democrats did in 1968). Free markets fail due to government intervention and corruption. Had Fannie May and Freddie Mac, government supported institutions, not messed with the free market by buying loans issued to anyone with a heart beat to “put people in homes they can’t afford” – Clinton’s words in a late 90s speech, then we would not have seen the housing bubble and collapse. Also, the SEC should have caught Madoff years ago. Government focus should be to not interfere with the free markets, but to stamp out corruption /”croney capitialism” which is a big threat to the success of free market capitialism and is why Russia, while better than it was as a Communist country, still does not have as high of standard of living as capitalism can provide due to all the corruption.
    Oh yeah, and British health care? Why do people with means in Britian now pay for private health insurance? Talk to honest Brits and they’ll tell you that getting in to see a doctor to get a diagnosis is realitively quick, but getting any procedures done can require half a year on a waiting list or more, unless you have private insurance. And many die while on that waiting list – a good thing for the government system becasue they no longer have the expense. As in all government, the survival of the system becomes more important than the patient.

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  11. Typical liberal you are, Furry GM. Delivery of facts refused and no relative counter facts presented. Trying to dismiss such facts by grouping me into the “Fox” category so you can convienently ignore them. Liberals love to group people so they can pit one group against another and not think about the actual issues. Open your mind and think like an individual, not a group. It’s not a Republican or Democrat thing either. It shouldn’t matter what letter is next to a politician’s name, it should be their ideas that matter. Ideas that are either proven to work over history or proven to fail. Nixon, a Republican, had and implemented some terrible ideas by messing with the free market with his government wage and price controls. Kennedy, a Democrat, had a good idea with loweirng taxes which actually caused the total revenue from tax dollars to increase (and it has every time it’s been tried, because the overall economic activity increases because the cost of doing business is lower – taxes are a cost of doing business). It’s so sad that no real intelligent debate occurs today because everyone has been conviently grouped and all hide behind a few talking points that are a mile wide but an inch deep. Whenever I’ve talked openly with my extreme liberal friends, they say their talking point and when they have nothing else behind it they jump to another topic and throw up their talking points on that one as well. Free and open debate about ideas needs to be resurrected in the US and we really need to be seen, act, and think as individuals and not the groups that the press and liberals want to classify us by. Debate with an open mind, considering all facts and not just switching off the minute something conflicts with your personal mantra…

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  12. You have some anger issues, “Seeker”. You didn’t present any real argument. I said it is circular. Meaning that it was going nowhere. You are responsible for lumping all people in convenient categories. No me.
    I said this was going nowhere. And I meant it.
    Get some anger management and maybe someone will be more receptive to your “debate”. Which I have to point out is not very open minded on your part.
    There’s no reason to be angry because I said this was moot.

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  13. You have some anger issues, “Seeker”. You didn’t present any real argument. I said it is circular. Meaning that it was going nowhere. You are responsible for lumping all people in convenient categories. No me.
    I said this was going nowhere. And I meant it.
    Get some anger management and maybe someone will be more receptive to your “debate”. Which I have to point out is not very open minded on your part.
    There’s no reason to be angry because I said this was moot.

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  14. You have some anger issues, “Seeker”. You didn’t present any real argument. I said it is circular. Meaning that it was going nowhere. You are responsible for lumping all people in convenient categories. No me.
    I said this was going nowhere. And I meant it.
    Get some anger management and maybe someone will be more receptive to your “debate”. Which I have to point out is not very open minded on your part.
    There’s no reason to be angry because I said this was moot.

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  15. Apparently, things don’t come across well via text but there is zero anger here. I am open minded and am willing to consider any facts that are presented. The truth is out there, it’s up to us to find it. It’s only going nowhere because you have nothing to offer to support your claims, and that’s fine, but just state it, or do some research to support your impressions that socialism is a good thing. I made no “the NY Times has quite the hold on you” (or choose CBS, CNN, etc.) comment. You did with Fox so you are doing the lump and ignore.
    Zero anger on my side, zilch, zero, none. Just looking for pros and cons on this critical 21st century issue. The 20th century has proven to me that socialism creates shortages and fails and free market capitialism has created the most freedom and greatest standard of living for the most people in recorded history.
    If you have nothing to add, just say so instead of saying “it’s a circular argument” as an excuse to not think. If you have some socialist successes to share from history, I’m all ears. I’ve even presented one: social security, if the government could have keep their greedy hands off it and left it locked from their politically motivated spending so that the funds that people actually paid in were still there when we need them to retire.
    This is an important topic so lessons from the 20th century and history for that matter are learned and mistakes aren’t repeated. There should be no anger in the discussion, just logical analysis.
    Why can’t people talk and debate without one (typically the one with no more to offer and fearing that their previously rock solid beleifs might be challenged…) claiming “anger”.
    No anger here and I hope none on your end too.

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  16. I guess Sweden, France, Canada and great Britain are not supportive enough so there you go. My friends in England are very happy with their health care. As are the family in Canada, but you have been dismissive of that as well. So, there you go.
    And you should reread your posts. You come off very angry.
    I have plenty to say. I choose to spend it on someone who is actually open to hearing it.
    This is circular. And it is over for me. Talk on all you want to. You like to hear yourself it seems.

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  17. I guess Sweden, France, Canada and great Britain are not supportive enough so there you go. My friends in England are very happy with their health care. As are the family in Canada, but you have been dismissive of that as well. So, there you go.
    And you should reread your posts. You come off very angry.
    I have plenty to say. I choose to spend it on someone who is actually open to hearing it.
    This is circular. And it is over for me. Talk on all you want to. You like to hear yourself it seems.

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  18. I guess Sweden, France, Canada and great Britain are not supportive enough so there you go. My friends in England are very happy with their health care. As are the family in Canada, but you have been dismissive of that as well. So, there you go.
    And you should reread your posts. You come off very angry.
    I have plenty to say. I choose to spend it on someone who is actually open to hearing it.
    This is circular. And it is over for me. Talk on all you want to. You like to hear yourself it seems.

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  19. I think Australian Shepherds are Blue Dog Democrats. They want some order but take care of the flock.
    German Shorthaired Pointers – Green Party. They are all happy and friendly all the time. Makes me think they are hippies without the weed.
    Chihuahuas are the Tea Partiers. Just all angry and aggressive for no good reason.

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  20. Good Furry GM, that’s a start. How are Sweden’s, France’s, Canada’s, and Britain’s economies capitalist? What aspects of their economies are socialist and what do you admire about these socialist portions? I hear you saying government health care is one. I’d ask you to dig deeper on the English health care before citing it as a good and fully socialist thing. How much funding goes to administration of the system vs patient care?
    I too have friends in Canada. Ask your friends how much they pay for their “free” healthcare. From mine I have:
    29% federal income tax + 17.5% provincial income tax + a 15% sales tax. So before you even get your check, the gov’t takes 46.5% of it as income taxes. You’re working almost half the year just to pay the government. Then you have to pay them 15% every time you spend a dollar. That’s 61.5% of income assuming you spend 100% of income for that “free” healthcare. The point is that government is inefficent where as the free market is efficient. Over time, government costs increase for fewer and fewer services while the free market is motivated to find ways to provide better service at a lower cost. Costs are driven down by the free market and costs skyrocket under the government (leading to rationing and shortages of services as the only control they have on costs).
    Health care is a problem in the US. Costs are out of control. But this is precisely because the free market is not being allowed to work in health care. Have you ever asked a US doctor or hospital how much something will cost? They look at you like you are insane. Without consumers knowing or caring what things cost, there is no downward pressure on costs. I’ve had multiple instances where I’ve asked the cost because I have a high deductible and was paying out of pocket. In some cases they couldn’t even figure out what it would cost. In one case, they wanted to provide me with an air cast which would cost the hospital (and I) $250. Once I found out the cost, I declined it and bought a $15 ace bandage which accomplished the same thing. The point is that the free market is not being allowed to work in health care. Government intervention in the free market is a big cause. The gov’t doesn’t allow health insurance agencies to opperate across state lines. Allowing this alone would increase competition and reduce processing costs due to economies of scale in the private sector. The US has the best health care in the world – it’s just too expensive. Rich oil Shieks from the middle east go to the Mao clinic in MN and the Cleveland clinic in OH (so much so they are building a facility in the Middle East). Let the free market work and it will not only be the best but also the least expensive. Also, I have a nice article from CNN (hardly a conservative news outlet) which I will share with you on a separate post which specifically mentions 3 of the 4 countries you mentioned.
    I hope you don’t disengage because I am interested to hear more specifics of the socialist aspects of these countries that you like and would like the US to emulate.

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  21. CNN article as promised:
    FROM CNN’s Jack Cafferty:
    We are constantly being told what a great health care system other countries like Canada, France and Britain have. But guess what? Some Canadians are crossing the border to Michigan to get health care.
    And we’re talking about more than just coming over for an appointment, quick lab test or a second opinion. According to an article in the Detroit Free Press, Canadian health agencies are creating formal partnerships with hospitals in Michigan to provide services not quickly available at home through their national health care system.
    For example, the Ontario Ministry of Health has agreements with some Detroit hospitals for imaging tests, bariatric, heart and other services that have long waiting lists in Ontario. Rather than paying out of pocket for crossing the border, the bill is paid by the plan, sort of like staying with an in network doctor if you have private insurance in the U.S.
    Michael Vujovich of Windsor came to Henry Ford Hospital in Detroit where he had an angioplasty done. The bill was $38,000. It was paid in full by the Ministry of Health in Ontario.
    Canada sees this approach as better than shelling out money to build additional facilities in Canada to meet the demand for care. Critics of national health care systems like Canada’s are quick to point out that the system is not working if they have to send their patients to the U.S.
    Here’s my question to you: What does it mean that Canadians are crossing the border for U.S. health care?

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  22. Oh my!! I disappear for a couple of days, and I miss all the fun!
    I love June’s mom.
    I love Furry.
    You guys rock.
    And also…my Golden Retriever, Lucy, is a Democrat!

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  23. It’s creepy, Furry GM, because that’s exactly what you wanted to do rather than allow yourself to think openly for a minute.

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  24. No, you aren’t interested in what others have to say. You are only interested in what YOU have to say.
    The whole disengage comments were desperate. And creepy. As were the rants after I left. And the hysterical name calling when you didn’t get your way.

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  25. No, you aren’t interested in what others have to say. You are only interested in what YOU have to say.
    The whole disengage comments were desperate. And creepy. As were the rants after I left. And the hysterical name calling when you didn’t get your way.

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  26. No, you aren’t interested in what others have to say. You are only interested in what YOU have to say.
    The whole disengage comments were desperate. And creepy. As were the rants after I left. And the hysterical name calling when you didn’t get your way.

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  27. I wouldn’t be too impressed Seeker did not write much about politics just gave a bunch of opinions. The gist of it being that if we had “capitalist” healthcare doctors would be competing to give patients the lowest price sort of like that old Lending Tree commercial.
    Tea Party( the “party” in their name makes it seem like they are having a laugh instead of the bitter, racist, misguided lot that they actually are) usually blather on about economics, and capitalistism without having any understanding of these subjects.

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  28. I wonder, Jen, if you could possibly site one instance of racism at a tea party event? Have you been to one? Or do you just claim to know the thoughts and intentions of millions of people?

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  29. Dogs are Democrats and cats are Republicans (at least, Republican politicians): dogs blithely care about you and your well-being even if you don’t like them, while cats will happily take what you give them but ignore you and your needs.
    There are exceptions, of course; many, many Republican human beings are lovely and compassionate (although I honestly can’t think of a Republican *politician* who seems to give a damn about the less fortunate) and many, many cats are warm and affectionate (i.e., dog-like). But I just had to stick up for golden retrievers–no way are they Republican!

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