All My Children

Well, I'm unfunny once again. I lost the Socialluxe contest for funniest blogger. The winners were Cakewrecks, who won last year as well because it's great, and also The Bloggess. Who is funny and gets 9 hundred million readers. So thank heavens she won and got exposure, which was supposed to be the point of the awards.

Crap. Why I gotta be not funny?

I was talking with Faithful Reader and Commenter and Eater of Hamburgers with Celery on Them TwelveDaysOld, and we have decided is our brand of humor is just too lofty and sophisticated for the average reader. Yeah. We are the PBS of humor.

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PBS
What do you think? June BS.

By the way, that is old hair. I do not have that Beethoven hair anymore. Someone asked how my chemical straightening was going and the curls are definitely fighting their way back in.

Why I gotta be not funny and frizzy-haired?

Maybe in much the same way that they tell you not to fight your hair, I should not fight the part where I am not funny. Maybe this should start being a somber blog. Perhaps we should start discussing the news of the day and the pressing issues of our time.

Does anyone want to talk about matte nail polish? Why is that in now? It's like we all forgot our top coat.

How are you liking my new somber tone so far?

So let's review. I'm not funny, I'm 45, I can't have a puppy and my frizz is returning.

Oh, and my dog can't do this.

Carp.

81 thoughts on “All My Children

  1. Yeah June, your blog has a hardcore group of dedicated fans rather than a sea of people who are only there because of some award. You have the hip of a cult classic movie rather than those popcorn flicks.
    Also, I’ll be well jealous if you all get to meet up and I can’t be there. London is so far! Also Hulk, as host, would you also be providing hookers and blow?

    Like

  2. I agree with everyone else, I like having a “small” group. I never read the comments on any other blog, this blog is the only one I really care about and HAVE to read every day.
    And just like others have said, I do not understand how Cake wrecks could even be in the same category, they might be funny, but really it is just a collection of pictures that people send in. I think a well written post cannot compare to that at all.
    I would love a get together, but I am not one of the funny regular commenters, so maybe I would just stand there and not have anything to say.

    Like

  3. Oh, for the love of cheese.
    Cake Wrecks? Stale. (See what I did there?)
    And The Bloggess? With the rollers? Not at all funny, and I know from funny.
    OMG, that effin dog! I’ve got two KIDS that can’t do that!
    Junie, you know how I wept and rent my garments when The Internet Crackdown was imposed at work. Devastation was my middle name. (Paula Devastation Hookers & Blow.) Now I alternate between reading you on my Kindle or on my phone, whichever is easier to sneak when Mr. Drysdale/Tudball (hereinafter “Drysball”. heh) is all up in mah grill. And I love love love that you post early in the morning! It’s the first thing I do when I get to work! I try to read you before ole Drysball shows up.
    Junie, you are funny and you are fresh and you are hip and I was just telling my husband all this the other day and do you know what he said to me?
    “Would you close the damn door, I’m trying to take a crap.”
    Bahahahahahahahahahahaha!!
    No, seriously. You are the FIRST blog I read (sneakily) at work and then the FIRST blog I read when I FINALLY get home so I can comment.
    And I love all my screenies, too.
    Now what’s this about a road trip?

    Like

  4. Oh, for the love of cheese.
    Cake Wrecks? Stale. (See what I did there?)
    And The Bloggess? With the rollers? Not at all funny, and I know from funny.
    OMG, that effin dog! I’ve got two KIDS that can’t do that!
    Junie, you know how I wept and rent my garments when The Internet Crackdown was imposed at work. Devastation was my middle name. (Paula Devastation Hookers & Blow.) Now I alternate between reading you on my Kindle or on my phone, whichever is easier to sneak when Mr. Drysdale/Tudball (hereinafter “Drysball”. heh) is all up in mah grill. And I love love love that you post early in the morning! It’s the first thing I do when I get to work! I try to read you before ole Drysball shows up.
    Junie, you are funny and you are fresh and you are hip and I was just telling my husband all this the other day and do you know what he said to me?
    “Would you close the damn door, I’m trying to take a crap.”
    Bahahahahahahahahahahaha!!
    No, seriously. You are the FIRST blog I read (sneakily) at work and then the FIRST blog I read when I FINALLY get home so I can comment.
    And I love all my screenies, too.
    Now what’s this about a road trip?

    Like

  5. Oh, for the love of cheese.
    Cake Wrecks? Stale. (See what I did there?)
    And The Bloggess? With the rollers? Not at all funny, and I know from funny.
    OMG, that effin dog! I’ve got two KIDS that can’t do that!
    Junie, you know how I wept and rent my garments when The Internet Crackdown was imposed at work. Devastation was my middle name. (Paula Devastation Hookers & Blow.) Now I alternate between reading you on my Kindle or on my phone, whichever is easier to sneak when Mr. Drysdale/Tudball (hereinafter “Drysball”. heh) is all up in mah grill. And I love love love that you post early in the morning! It’s the first thing I do when I get to work! I try to read you before ole Drysball shows up.
    Junie, you are funny and you are fresh and you are hip and I was just telling my husband all this the other day and do you know what he said to me?
    “Would you close the damn door, I’m trying to take a crap.”
    Bahahahahahahahahahahaha!!
    No, seriously. You are the FIRST blog I read (sneakily) at work and then the FIRST blog I read when I FINALLY get home so I can comment.
    And I love all my screenies, too.
    Now what’s this about a road trip?

    Like

  6. I agree with Sandra; I never read the comments of any other blog on a regular basis. And if you DID win first place it would be so hard to comment at all. Too much scrolling down to even enter a contest at Pioneer Woman.
    We love you!

    Like

  7. Forget the dumb contest! Girl friend you are funny! I refuse to even peek at wrecked cakes, or is that cakes wrecked? I look forward to reading your blog every day and most days I’m her cracking up. So forget the contest. We know you are a winner.
    I though you had cut your hair and was about to say your hair looks great! It did look great in the photo.

    Like

  8. I have company over and should be with them but just wanted to pop in for a minute.
    June Gardens, sit down, look in the mirror and repeat after me….I’m good enough, I’m funny enough, and doggone it, people like me!

    Like

  9. Your blog is so good I just spent most of last week reading all of the archives. Now my arm is sore from all the mousing and and I can’t knit. But it was worth it.
    Matte nail polish reminds me of painting my nails with Wite-Out in typing class. (Hello I am old.) Mmmmmm the lovely smell of Wite-Out. Might explain why I didn’t do so well in Algebra.

    Like

  10. I agree with what everyone else said … your blog rocks the big rocks. Your commenters are hilarious too. And matte nail polish?? What’s the point???

    Like

  11. I, to, am addicted to the Junebug. I have to have my fix every day. I have also read all the archives..scary, much??? And why am I addicted??? Because you are so ding dang funny!

    Like

  12. I apologize for being late to the party, but I just need to know, who are these people that are cleaning house in their pajamas? I have never woken up with the urge to clean anything. Ever.

    Like

  13. Paula and Linda in Co just made me spew coffee. We also have a pit bull for whom the phrase, “silent but deadly” was coined. I’m considering a gas mask.
    See? There are so many extra funny people who comment that, between the June and the commenters, who even needs other blogs? I gotta work, people!
    Hey, Beth SW. I am a social worker and also a Steve’s wife…go figure.

    Like

  14. Paula and Linda in Co just made me spew coffee. We also have a pit bull for whom the phrase, “silent but deadly” was coined. I’m considering a gas mask.
    See? There are so many extra funny people who comment that, between the June and the commenters, who even needs other blogs? I gotta work, people!
    Hey, Beth SW. I am a social worker and also a Steve’s wife…go figure.

    Like

  15. Paula and Linda in Co just made me spew coffee. We also have a pit bull for whom the phrase, “silent but deadly” was coined. I’m considering a gas mask.
    See? There are so many extra funny people who comment that, between the June and the commenters, who even needs other blogs? I gotta work, people!
    Hey, Beth SW. I am a social worker and also a Steve’s wife…go figure.

    Like

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