Who is irking me?
He LOUNGES all over the computer, and RUBS his annoying head on the top of the screen, pushing it back so I cannot see, and he Googles SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS or 11111111111111111111 and I know he doesn't really want to look either of those up. Because I've asked him what he wants with those sites. And he didn't have an intelligent answer.
He is totally in.my.way. Bugging me.
Anyway, it's Tuesday, which means it's Pieces of Wisdom day. Really, you all gave me a lot of wisdom yesterday when I asked how to get soap scum off the shower door. How come no one answered, "Just leave it there" which would be my answer? Everyone stampeded in with a solution. As if you had already worked on it.
I asked Marvin if we could take the stupid shower door down and get a shower curtain, which I infinitely prefer, and he said yes, so that is how we are solving the shower door dilemma.
How to get soap scum off the shower door? Remove the door and throw it out. Problem solved.
So, seeing as we already exchanged wisdom this week, I was kind of stuck for what to ask today. Marvin was leashing up an hysterical Tallulah this morning, who was on her way to day care, where she has already bullied a Boxer puppy (Marvin called to tell me. We really have to take her back to that trainer lady. The one who made me cook liver. Tallulah is a jerk).
Anyway, I was making coffee as he was lassoing the dog, and I said, "What should I ask for Wedges of Wisdom today?"
"Ask to see people's medicine cabinets," said Marvin, who is nosy.
He really is. Marvin feels perfectly entitled to listen in to people's conversations (he used to stand on our dining room table with a glass on the ceiling to hear our upstairs neighbor), or look through their things if we are house sitting (won't you ask us soon?), or report to me any hugely personal info he happened to see that he shouldn't have.
("I saw Hoo-de-hoo and Hoe-de-Hoe's tax documents while I was in the bathroom," he'll say. "Do you know they make $800,000 a year?"
"How did you see their tax documents in the bathroom?"
"I didn't see them in the bathroom. Gross. I saw them in the den. Which was right near the bathroom. If they didn't want people to SEE that stuff they wouldn't have it right out like that.")
So, Marvin wants to see your medicine cabinets for Pieces of Wedges of Wedgies of Wisdom Wednesdays.
Here is ours. I took a better picture, where the bottom shelf is not cut off, but you have no idea how much trouble this stupid stupid stupid computer is giving me today. Anyway, there is my trusted Nair, which stops me from being a walrus, and our very minty Crest, because for me toothpaste cannot be minty and strong enough. I like it to burn like a dragon.
Also, we have many Bath and Body Works products because someone at school gave Marvin a bunch for Christmas last year. I keep stealing the antibacterial and go ahead and tell me how antibiotics won't work on me.
Oh, also too, there is my thermometer, which I use 748 times a week.
Down below is my root touchup stick that you all thought was a vibrator, because you are all sick sick people.
Send me your medicine cabinet picture, and a link to your blog if you have one, and I will put it up tomorrow.
Also, Marvin would like to come to dinner soon. He has looked at your online calendar and knows you are free net week.