Thank you all for coming around this year. Here are some highlights. Or lowlights, depending on your perspective. And remember last year, when you said my accompanying music was like you were listening to Muzak at the thrift store? Poor Marvin. THIS year I used a song by my friend Beth Thornley. I think … Continue reading 2010 Be Poppin’
So it was Christmas last week. Did you notice? I keep saying Ima tell you about mine, so here I go. We went to TinyTown for Christmas Eve, as we are wont to do. As usual, we had a good time, other than the part where Edsel peed on our hostess's floor. It was too … Continue reading My Christmas, a highly anticipated story that really isn’t that fascinating
Who adores herself long time? I could NOT bring myself to put on skimpy clothes for that party. It was just so COLD and SNOWY outside. So I kept on my winter ensemble (see above) (do you enjoy my Puss-n-Boots boots?) but put on a beach hat, used a beach tote for a purse, and … Continue reading June’s lips get the attention they deserve
Oh my good God from Goldsboro, I feel like I have not talked to all 950 million of you in a month. I have so many things to tell you, all of them pertinent, as per usual, but I am pressed for time. Pressed. For time. We had a snowstorm here on Christmas day, and … Continue reading In which June involuntarily lives in the 1800s house, but is not paid by PBS
I will tell you all about my Christmas tomorrow, because I'm certain you won't be able to rest until you get every detail, but in the meantime here are more of your holiday good deeds. Keep in mind I know I missed some of them, especially those of you who emailed me your good deeds … Continue reading Merry Ding-Dang Christmas!
Guess what. It's Christmas. Below are the good deeds you all did, although there were so many of them that I couldn't list them all in on post. You all rock the haus! I will list more tomorrow. P.S. The part where Marvin just called poor Talu "lard ass" is not listed as one … Continue reading Good Christmas Deeds. Part One of 5929058345.
Marvin has been home on his Christmas break for two days now, and for two mornings in a row his alarm has gone off at 5:00. This morning we were greeted with "Come On Feel The Noise" by ...Ratt? Poison? Rat Poison? Quiet Riot! It just popped into my head. Because you can take me … Continue reading Come on feel the Beneful
I know, I know, I am late posting today. Why are you more busy when you're jobless than when you're not? I had to screech on over to another city today to get tested for drugs for a potential freelance job. I studied hard and really practiced. Do you see those funny colors? I think … Continue reading Pieces of Wisdom: Being greedy about a kidney
I had a dream last night that I found the best mascara ever. My eyelashes looked like I had slaughtered a mink and slapped its poor pelt up there. Oh, my lashes looked good. In my dream, I kept admiring them in the mirror and batting them at everyone. Am I the shallowest person you … Continue reading Pieces of Wisdom–Greed Edition
If you want to hear the whole story on what Ima tell you, click here. But I'm just saying. I hope you're on Christmas vacation this week, because I just looked at that post and it is seventy years long. If you do not wish to go to that link, today I am going to … Continue reading Chicken
While Marvin got me a gift, I totally went to Target. Because where else can you find a hot young salesboy to seduce? Actually, I was out of my meds, which I suppose has been evident for years. Target was empty and pristine, and the parking lot was a delight. Mmm-hmmm. When I finally burst … Continue reading In which June has found her calling
Well, here I am. Naked. How do you like it? I never said there'd be photos. Today Marvin and I are heading out to go shopping. Because we figured no one else would be doing that this weekend. We are going to the ironically named Friendly Center, a large outdoor shopping center in my neighborhood, … Continue reading Married Lady
I hope you got some rest last night, after hearing that terrible story from Marvin's childhood. I really did not know he was gonna get on here and do that. Who loves himself? But, you know, after that awful story, we have to be nice to Marv. In other news, guess who came back? Like … Continue reading In which June returns, with no childhood trauma to tell you about
Hi. Marvin here. I thought I would take advantage of this snow day (ice day, really) by getting something off my chest that has been bothering me for the last thirty-five years or so. Thanks in advance for your indulgence on this matter. Somewhere around the fifth grade, I was given the honor of joining the … Continue reading A Great Injustice
There are two men blowing leaves, so to speak, next door, and you can imagine how this delights my dogs. What cacophony? They are blowing the leaves into the dead neighbor's lawn across the street, which is rude. Perhaps she told them once they could blow those leaves there over her dead body. Oh, and … Continue reading Pieces of Wisdom re the cat we will probably never see
Yeah. He climbed that thing like he was Tenzing Norgay. And I'd like to thank Marvin for the 88374 Mt. Everest documentaries, which allow me to toss out names like Tenzing Norgay. You'd think the part where I have a very bad cat would dissuade me from what else happened last night, but have you … Continue reading A really tiny piece of wisdom that involves a cat, Hulk
I haven't got anything to blog about today, so okay bye. See. Here you still are. Even though I said okay bye. You are kind of like Marvin, who can never hang up the phone after the first time he says goodbye. "Okay, then. Be careful. Be careful how you go. Talk to you soon. … Continue reading The post about nothing
Love Actually is an underrated movie. That's all I have to say about that.
I had such a BIZZELDY day yesterday. I have a statistics textbook to proofread, which I haven't even opened yet, and I was going to start it yesterday. But first, as you know if you read me yesterday and why didn't you, I had to scream on over to the headache clinic for my final … Continue reading In which June inadvertently attends Elizabeth Edwards’ funeral
Who can't stand herself? I set my alarm for 8:00, because I have an appointment at the headache clinic today. You go there and they bang you over the head. BAH. No. It is the final day of my meeting with them about the experimental migraine drug they have had me on since June. Other … Continue reading Diamond June