Pieces of Tasteful Wisdom: June’s Ball

Oh, you all came up with BEAUTIFUL ideas for Edsel's neutering party! You should all be professional neutering party planners. Which now that I think of it, someone said in the comments, as well. I have no original thoughts. You all came up with them.

So, based on your ideas, Ima serve a cheese ball with crackers, brownies with nuts (aka Before) and then another pan without nuts (aka After), and then some kind of meatball.

Now, I failed to mention that my mother is coming to town, so you better watch out, you better not cry. So we will be out all day the day of the party and what I want is a meatball recipe you can make in a crock pot.

I was hoping for kind of a sausage-y crock pot recipe. Anyone? Bueller?

So I'll go shopping tomorrow, and in the meantime, yesterday I got party decorations. Who loves herself so bad?

Spade
I got little spade dishes that I think I will hang up. I know male dogs get neutered and not spayed. Shut up. It's funny.

Hangingchili
One of you suggested chili lights, but they were $12.99, so I got dangling swirling chilis instead.

Chili
And a big inflatable chili.

Spadepicks
And spade  hors d'oeuvres picks. Does anyone need heart and club toothpicks? Also? I had no idea how many party themes there are out there till I went to this party store.

Crayon
Red crayon erasers as party favors. Love love love myself.

One of you suggested lipstick as a party favor, but they didn't have lipstick. I looked in the whole little girl party princess theme area? They have lip balm for kids now. Which, why? That's way messier than lipstick.

I told the checkout girl what I was doing, as she cashed out my 50 white balloons and white string that Ima hang from my ceiling, and she thought it was so funny that she told the other casher, who was a man.

"Ma'am, y'all just made my stomach hurt," he told me. "You can't tell a man about stuff like that."

I told him Edsel failed to see the humor in this party, as well.

Someone said in the comments that I should decorate Edsel in a Swiss flag to show he is neutral, and I'm totally on the lookout for said flag. Because I cannot give up a theme once I get started, apparently.

So thanks again for growing a pair and helping a sister out!

 

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Author: June

At one point, I was sort of hot, in a "she's 27 and probably a 7" kind of a way. Now I'm old and have to develop a charming personality. Guess how that's going.

75 thoughts on “Pieces of Tasteful Wisdom: June’s Ball”

  1. Please do not torture Edsel in the creation of this party in his name, and you must use his pseudonym Eden due to all the delightful spade items.
    Crockpot meatballs…these sound awful but are awesome, and EASY, June.
    Place meatballs in Crockpot. Mix together a bottle of BBQ sauce, your choice, and a small jar of grape jelly, and pour over meatballs. Cook on low for 6-8 hrs. Serve on spade (or club) toothpicks.

    Like

  2. Please do not torture Edsel in the creation of this party in his name, and you must use his pseudonym Eden due to all the delightful spade items.
    Crockpot meatballs…these sound awful but are awesome, and EASY, June.
    Place meatballs in Crockpot. Mix together a bottle of BBQ sauce, your choice, and a small jar of grape jelly, and pour over meatballs. Cook on low for 6-8 hrs. Serve on spade (or club) toothpicks.

    Like

  3. Please do not torture Edsel in the creation of this party in his name, and you must use his pseudonym Eden due to all the delightful spade items.
    Crockpot meatballs…these sound awful but are awesome, and EASY, June.
    Place meatballs in Crockpot. Mix together a bottle of BBQ sauce, your choice, and a small jar of grape jelly, and pour over meatballs. Cook on low for 6-8 hrs. Serve on spade (or club) toothpicks.

    Like

  4. Meatball Recipe: Bag of frozen meatballs, 1 jar grape jelly, 1 bottle chile sauce. Very good! Sorry, I hope I didn’t repeat this recipe.. I didn’t have tiem to read all your comments!

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  5. OH-EM-GEE, I so want to play poker for money with June! DYING here!
    I want to see a video of the crap dance you’re doing after reading Amy’s comment!

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  6. oh my stars – I MUST get over stomach bug so I can see the glory. You are too, too twisted. Like a lipstick, you are.

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  7. oh my stars – I MUST get over stomach bug so I can see the glory. You are too, too twisted. Like a lipstick, you are.

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  8. oh my stars – I MUST get over stomach bug so I can see the glory. You are too, too twisted. Like a lipstick, you are.

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  9. haha, It probably would have slipped right past me, except the future MiL’s last name is Spayd, so Earl has a Spade tattooed on his left leg… I’m usually not that attentive to details!
    Go buy some $0.99 NYC lipstick to make yourself feel better, June.

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  10. I’m glad I wasn’t the one to break the news that those were clubs.
    Get the chili sauce not the bbq sauce for the meatballs. There is a difference in this oh so hoity toity recipe. Is that how you spell hoity toity?
    How hard could it be to make a Swiss flag? What about using swiss cheese?

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  11. Love the party plans (well, except for the club dishes that make no sense what-so-ever!) Agree with Furry – be sure Edsel has a new ball for the night. And snowballs for dessert – perfect!

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  12. HEY JUNE!! While most people know that Switzerland was neutral in WWII, so was the Republic of Ireland and this time of the year you will have an easier time finding an Irish flag. Of course, you will spend all evening explaining the connection…
    Also, for music how about AC/DC’s Big Balls for a theme song as guests arrive?

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  13. The best crockpot meatball recipe ever… from my sister, Lee.
    2-3 bags of frozen meatballs (that’s right. Cheat. Don’t make your own meatballs, get the frozen ones from the grocery. Trust me, it’s so good, it doesn’t matter.)
    Throw those bad boys in crock pot and then…
    Mix together the following in a saucepan: 16 oz bag refrigerated sauerkraut, drained
    16 oz can whole cranberry sauce
    12 oz bottle chili sauce
    1/2 cup packed brown sugar
    1 cup water
    Bring to boil and let simmer for 5 minutes. Pour over meatballs and heat for 4-5 hours on low.
    No one will ever know these have sauerkraut in them. My husband HATES sauerkraut and loves, loves, loves these meatballs.

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  14. I was just about to give you my meatball recipe but I see sissy Jan beat me to it. OMGee those suckers are good. You want to lick your fingers, the plate, the inside of the crock they are so good. I know it sounds like an odd recipe but TRUST ME they are GOOD! The first time people try them they WILL want the recipe.

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  15. Sorry if this is a repeat….had to scan comments quickly and didn’t see it.
    How about little bottles of hand sanitizer since Edsel is now “sterile”? You could either favor this or have pretty ones set about the tables, etc.

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  16. I had a catering friend who said they used to buy a bag or two of frozen meatballs, put them in the crockpot with a bottle of ketchup and a jar of grape jelly (the cheap kind), and let it stew for however many hours on low. Apparently very popular, and hard to get easier.
    I see everyone else already told you those are clubs. Maybe they can be the “before” dishes, and add a couple of spade items for “after.”

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  17. Bah! Aunt Tettie’s sterile suggestion!
    Oh how I wish I was a cool kid that was invited to this party!
    I, too, came here for some RHoBH reunion part 2 gossip! I have to say, part 2 let me down. Refusing to talk about Kim’s issues?!?! The glossing over of Taylor’s pitiful marriage?!?! The best part was Lisa and Cedric’s fight. What BALLS he has (unlike Eden!)! I’m guessing he was trying to extort them, hence the police report?!?!
    I was REALLY sad Jiggy wasn’t there! Love me some Jiggy! Anyone else? Thoughts?

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  18. My dog just got neutered Monday. I feel bad I have no party planned for him. I’m having guests on Sunday, so I suppose we need to celebrate a ball-less Bruno! And, believe me, I am so happy I don’t have to look at those things anymore. At the very least, that’s worth a toast or two.
    I was thinking crab balls…

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  19. I love Furry’s idea of the big pink sno-ball things for dessert. I keep missing the fun because the great state of Texas is having “rolling power outages” in all the largest cities to make sure there is enough power to keep everyone warm.
    However they are keeping the power to the stupid Cowboy Stadium for the Super Bowl. Which isn’t till Sunday. And aren’t the Packers and the Steelers used to cold?

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  20. I love Furry’s idea of the big pink sno-ball things for dessert. I keep missing the fun because the great state of Texas is having “rolling power outages” in all the largest cities to make sure there is enough power to keep everyone warm.
    However they are keeping the power to the stupid Cowboy Stadium for the Super Bowl. Which isn’t till Sunday. And aren’t the Packers and the Steelers used to cold?

    Like

  21. I love Furry’s idea of the big pink sno-ball things for dessert. I keep missing the fun because the great state of Texas is having “rolling power outages” in all the largest cities to make sure there is enough power to keep everyone warm.
    However they are keeping the power to the stupid Cowboy Stadium for the Super Bowl. Which isn’t till Sunday. And aren’t the Packers and the Steelers used to cold?

    Like

  22. OR…you could have those little bags of chocolate coins set about the place in homage to Edsel’s “change”
    I’ll shut up now…..

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  23. LisaPie, it is also in the little podunk towns in Texas. I have lost power twice so far, but at least I know it will come back on and not completely be gone. I wish they could give a scheduled time, so I can prepare and not get caught in a windowless bathroom without a flashlight.

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  24. LisaPie, I am your neighbor to the north in So.Ok.I woke up to no power yesterday.There is nothing quite like a can of pork n beans for breakfast, truly.

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  25. I am so glad to have gas-powered water heater and stove. I was able to boil water to make tea and make some quesadillas to eat.
    My candles are staying put rather than putting them away and getting them back out each time. Also, I have given up going around and setting all the stupid digital clocks on the appliances.
    I wish good luck and warmth to all the rest of you!

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  26. “I have to ask my wife.”
    That is CLASSIC! What the f*uck is WRONG with you people???
    Club plates…

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  27. Hulk, don’t you hate it when you crack yourself up and everyone else is clueless? Story of my life. I think it’s because of our uber-high IQs.

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  28. Hulk, don’t you hate it when you crack yourself up and everyone else is clueless? Story of my life. I think it’s because of our uber-high IQs.

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  29. Hulk, don’t you hate it when you crack yourself up and everyone else is clueless? Story of my life. I think it’s because of our uber-high IQs.

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  30. Pink Sno-balls are downright creepy. Just looking at them skeeves me out.

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  31. I don’t get it, I’ll have to ask my neutered husband who by the way is not so neutered, I’ll have you know and is actually sleeping in the next room because he left the house this morning at an unprecedented 5 am for an appointment on the other side of this stretched out state. He got home about an hour ago, exhausted. And since he works so hard for us, I massaged his back until he fell asleep. I’m a nice wife, I am.

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  32. So funny!!! I love the white balloons & strings hahahah!
    My best friend just made some delicious meatballs in her crockpot, different than any of the other recipes I see above….
    1-2 bags frozen meatballs
    1 bottle sweet & sour sauce (kikkoman’s)
    1 regular sized can of pineapple chunks (juice drained)
    1-2 chopped red and/or yellow bell peppers (minus the seeds & white veins)
    (Note: helps with the clean up if you use a crockpot liner)
    Put all the ingredients, except meatballs, into the crockpot and mix it up. Dump the meatballs in and toss with the rest of the ingredients. Warm on high until meatballs are ready.

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  33. I am so going to make Jan and Lee’s crock pot meatball recipe this weekend. I made Sadie’s lentil soup last night and it was fantastic! Hmmm; a BBP cookbook sounds interesting.

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  34. The hand sanitizer idea cracked me up! Sterile!
    A BBP cookbook would be fun. I will contribute the vegetarian recipe.

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  35. I didn’t notice they were clubs… I was sort of wondering how they fit, till I read June’s caption, then thought “oh, spades… spayed… I get it” I had to go back and look when I read the comment!
    It all looks like great fun, and I’m definitely making those meatballs!

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  36. Buy frozen meatballs, thaw them, and heat up with your favorite BBQ sauce-in-a-bottle. We do it all the time, & people love them 🙂

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  37. Yep, agree with Katie…large bag of frozen meatballs, bottle or two of BBQ sauce. Delicious! I’ve never heard of using grape jelly with that, but I might have to try it.

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  38. All Y’all’s meatball recipes sound delicious. I’ve only had the grape jelly and chili sauce meatballs that a friend always makes and they are soooo good, but I must try Lee’s recipe.

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  39. Shoot, now I don’t know for certain what my friend’s recipe is. I know she uses chili sauce and I just looked on the bottle and it has a recipe that uses a can of jellied cranberry sauce in place of the grape jelly. Now I think she uses the cranberry sauce, not the jelly. Whatever it is, it is super easy and always a hit.

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  40. Oh June…I lurk in the shadows and chuckle every day…but today I am crying at my desk at work. It was funny enough when you learned you had bought clubs…but when you made the crack about your diamond engagement ring, I totally lost it!

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  41. I just caught up on all your posts. Hadn’t been by in almost a month (yes, I know, sacrilege.) This post cracked me up, so much so, I had to read it to hubby. He was in Edsel’s court, thinking it wasn’t as funny as I was with my hysterical laughing. Sounds like a fun party to me! hehe

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