Pieces of Wisdom Wednesday–Now we know you at all over. I know that makes little sense.

Perhaps you're saying, Gee. I wish I knew someone as high-tech and fancy as June.

You don't. Deal with it.

Above is my fine map of the United States, showing where my readers are. If it's green, someone is reading me in that state. The greener it is, the more readers there are.

I also had 10 people reporting from Canada, one reader from Puerto Rico, one from London, one from France, one from someone's underpants.

I also had readers in Belgium, Luxemborg, Grenada, SE England, Australia and Argentina.

June. So worldly. So welcome.

The most readers came from my own state, North Carolina. I guess you like to read about your own place or something. Then after that I was big in Ohio, California and Texas. Well. I'm big everywhere, currently. What muffin top?

As of this writing, no one reported in from Wyoming, and why(oming), I wonder. Also, apparently no one likes me in Rhode Island, but it has like 14 people, so what are the chances? Maybe we should set up a campaign to get Rhode Island read. What say you?

Oh! And Vermont. No one said they were in Vermont. Cheese. I'm sure.

And finally, please note Montana. Giant Montana. Now, one of my ex-boyfriends lives there part of the time, and I know he reads me when he's there, but right now he's in our home town sleeping with all the young girls in Michigan. In spring he will return to Montana to check out the new crop of barely legals there. You so want to be this guy. Trust me on this.

I mean, Montana is a big state. Are they all out admiring moose and looking at their big sky? Buying chastity belts for their daughters for when my ex returns? Why aren't they reading this fine blog? Hmmm?

Still, this was exciting. I got most of the states and realized I could have a big North Carolina get-together if I felt like it.

Thanks for participating and representin'. How much do you like me for saying "representin'"?

Your hated-by-Montanans pal,

June

P.S. Mrs. Oh, who is recovering from a heart attack and needs entertainment, made me more maps! Go, Mrs. Oh and her heart! Bless her heart. Literally.

WorldCapture
USCapture

 

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Author: June

At one point, I was sort of hot, in a "she's 27 and probably a 7" kind of a way. Now I'm old and have to develop a charming personality. Guess how that's going.

94 thoughts on “Pieces of Wisdom Wednesday–Now we know you at all over. I know that makes little sense.”

  1. No one from Wyoming and yet it’s green up there on the map.
    What a fancy visual representation of readers!
    I have a suggestion for next week’s PoW:
    favorite apps! I have a few phone apps, but I could use some suggestions for additional ways to be cool. ha.

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  2. Wow! We are literally all over the map!!! Ha ha ha.
    Is Hulk the one in someone’s underpants??? Well, he wants to be…

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  3. June, You are high tech enough to know that it is even possible to make your own colorful map. You win the high-tech award for the day!

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  4. The people in Wyoming are too busy driving like stunt car drivers in a Tom Cruise movie since there’s barely any speed limits out there.
    I’m not sure why Rhode Island and Vermont aren’t reading. Maybe they’re too cold to read? Also, don’t hate me you invisible RI and VT people, but maybe they’re too crabby and have no desire to laugh? I’ve been to both places and yes, there were nice people there, but there were also a fair share of crabsters. At least, from my southern point of view. Southern people gush over everybody.
    And keep it up, Mrs. Oh.
    Go. Go. Go. Go. Mrs. Ohhh. It’s your birthday. We gonna party like it’s yo birthday. We gonna sip Bacardi like it’s your birthday. And you know we don’t give a f**uck, it’s not yo birthday.
    My congratulatory song to you. You’re welcome.

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  5. Wondering what the cutoff time was last night for Junie’s high-tech map. Reading the comments this morning from France, Japan and GEORGIA. We need a recount!
    Pendy, one of my dearest friends was from the OTHER Georgia before she passed away at the age of 90. Did you know that our own Mrs. Oh grew up in south Georgia?

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  6. Gotta say that yesterday’s roll call was exhilarating, June. I kept checking back all last evening to see what parts of the country (or world) were presenting. The map is very cool, but I think GA should be greener, really.
    Hulk, you are so funny! Hahahaha!

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  7. Gotta say that yesterday’s roll call was exhilarating, June. I kept checking back all last evening to see what parts of the country (or world) were presenting. The map is very cool, but I think GA should be greener, really.
    Hulk, you are so funny! Hahahaha!

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  8. Gotta say that yesterday’s roll call was exhilarating, June. I kept checking back all last evening to see what parts of the country (or world) were presenting. The map is very cool, but I think GA should be greener, really.
    Hulk, you are so funny! Hahahaha!

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  9. Aack . . . I am from Montana! Sorry for the delay. I am a true lurker and was sure someone else from this great state would chime in. We LOVE you June, from the bottom of our frosty hearts. (Sorry, it’s 4 below zero this a.m.)

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  10. Amish Annie assumes Mrs. Oh is not the all warm & fuzzy type, nonetheless, the wishes are definitely warm and fuzzy like that Snuggle bear for her heart says:

    Sending warm, fuzzy Valentine heart wishes out to Mrs. Oh for a quick recovery.

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  11. Amish Annie assumes Mrs. Oh is not the all warm & fuzzy type, nonetheless, the wishes are definitely warm and fuzzy like that Snuggle bear for her heart says:

    Sending warm, fuzzy Valentine heart wishes out to Mrs. Oh for a quick recovery.

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  12. Amish Annie assumes Mrs. Oh is not the all warm & fuzzy type, nonetheless, the wishes are definitely warm and fuzzy like that Snuggle bear for her heart says:

    Sending warm, fuzzy Valentine heart wishes out to Mrs. Oh for a quick recovery.

    Like

  13. No readers in Maine?? Firstly, no one even noticed. And B) I have 4 sisters who live in Maine. Surely one of them will stand up and be counted.
    And no, none are named Shirley.

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  14. Maybe I’m the only person in Maine that reads, although you didn’t mention us in your post. But I also read through google reader so I’m not sure if that screws up your stats.

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  15. Jaime, yes, if you read in Google Reader, you do not show up in my sitemeter. But also, my results today are as a result of people commenting yesterday about where they were, so if you didnt comment, I did not record you.

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  16. Hulk, Just saw your comment today. No I don’t know your red-headed friend. Brook Park – Oh God, does that mean you went to Midpark, cuz there’s that whole Berea/Midpark rivalry thing that’s been going on longer that the whole Browns/Steelers thing. I figured you must be from NE Ohio with your love of Browns, the Tribe, and the Bucks. Yay! Go Bucks basketball.

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  17. Wow Hulk, apparently the one thing Berea isn’t known for is its smarts. Obviously you didn’t graduate from Midpark, what with the whole Michigan/June connection. By the way, my condolences on the whole Michigan situation.

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  18. I just went back and read all 300 comments from yesterday. I have a big crick in my neck now. But it was worth the crick. It was like a warped Miss America pageant introduction.
    Who was Carin? Fess up. Hulk.
    And Jan, I was born in Joliet, Illinois. Yay!
    And my favorite comment was from The Expatresse who is always somewhere interesting. This time she was in Luxembourg and her husband was apparently in Mendoza, Argentina, bleeding like a stuck pig and ruining all his packed shirts.
    It just goes to show you never know what other people are doing with their day.

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  19. OJ, I thought the same thing about the Expatresse! Mendoza is either Number 1 or Number 2 on my list of places to retire. I love it so much! And there’s the Expatresse, sitting on a tuffet most likely while in Luxembourg while we sit wherever on the map we are waiting to hear the story behind the bloody shirts in Argentina!
    Out with it! Spill the news!

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  20. “It was like a warped Miss America pageant introduction.” Funny! Or like the LONG introduction of each state at the national political conventions.
    Georgia, the great state where the ocean meets the mountains (only if you drive at least 6 hours to get from one to the other), where pecan trees, peach trees, and Peachtrees abound, where Southern hospitality is alive and well (Hi, Y’all. Welcome to Georgia), where…

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  21. Yes, Stephanie…I was forced to move back to this God-forsaken state by my parents. So thanks for the sympathy.
    I do not remember the name of the high school in my neighborhood. I actually lived in Parma Heights. I think the hs mascot was a patriot or something…I remember my dad taking me to a game once.

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  22. We’ve got London and we’ve got France and Carin (the Ho) has Hulk’s underpants…..

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  23. We’ve got London and we’ve got France and Carin (the Ho) has Hulk’s underpants…..

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  24. We’ve got London and we’ve got France and Carin (the Ho) has Hulk’s underpants…..

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  25. *Warped Miss America pageant introduction*, yes! I must say that I had a visual of the old Mouseketeers introducing themselves…can’t you just see Siren? Strutting forward, hands on hips with big smile,a head toss, and a “Massachussetts”!

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  26. *Warped Miss America pageant introduction*, yes! I must say that I had a visual of the old Mouseketeers introducing themselves…can’t you just see Siren? Strutting forward, hands on hips with big smile,a head toss, and a “Massachussetts”!

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  27. *Warped Miss America pageant introduction*, yes! I must say that I had a visual of the old Mouseketeers introducing themselves…can’t you just see Siren? Strutting forward, hands on hips with big smile,a head toss, and a “Massachussetts”!

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  28. “I’m out there, Jerry and I’m LOVINGEVERYMINUTEOFIT!!”

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  29. A map! Maps are fun. I think it’s curious how the major population centers are only vaguely correlated with increased readership in a state (witness by example New York being out-shaded by North Carolina). Points to how the social aspect is perhaps not completely divorced from geography. It’d be interesting to watch the trend over time.

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  30. See, now I see Siren strutting on stage, stopping in the middle, giving a double-middle-finger to the audience, spitting on the floor, then walking off…

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  31. See, now I see Siren strutting on stage, stopping in the middle, giving a double-middle-finger to the audience, spitting on the floor, then walking off…

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  32. See, now I see Siren strutting on stage, stopping in the middle, giving a double-middle-finger to the audience, spitting on the floor, then walking off…

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  33. Regular JoAnn, most of the time I have to use a dictionary to write a comment and I’m not even close to sounding smart.
    Siren, I still love the visual of you strutting around the living room and yelling, with or without the exclamation point.

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  34. Yeah. What Hulk said. With an eyeroll. I might do that crotch-grab thing that sport dudes do, too. Seriously, what are they doing when they do that? Redistributing the package?

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  35. But, now Hulk has given me a new visual of Siren on stage.
    And of frozen people. Glad I’m in the sunny south.

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  36. But, now Hulk has given me a new visual of Siren on stage.
    And of frozen people. Glad I’m in the sunny south.

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  37. But, now Hulk has given me a new visual of Siren on stage.
    And of frozen people. Glad I’m in the sunny south.

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  38. Siren-
    Imagine your bra. Now imagine the cups, instead of soft lycra, are hard plastic shells that are so NOT the shape of your breasts…
    You gonna tell me you aren’t going to have the occasion to adjust the girls now and again?

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  39. Oh dear, I was intimidated by all the comments yesterday but here I am in VERMONT!
    Northeast Vermont…..the Northeast Kingdom (really, that’s what it’s called). I’ve only been reading for about 6 weeks and I am working my way through the archives so I feel like I’m in the novel “The Time Traveler’s Wife” with June of the past and June of the future.
    Anyway, Vermont loves ya – I hope we can be some shade of green 🙂

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  40. Hahaha, Anita, you are so spot-on. Hulk, you could put both my breasts in a teacup and still have enough room left over for a perfectly satisfying amount of the caffeinated beverage of your choice. I have never worn a bra in my life.
    That said, if you imagine my girls one more time I’m totally gonna sic Chris Hansen on your ass.

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  41. SHUT UP, Original Joann! How long did you live in my beloved home town? And it’s OK if you hated it or still hate it. I love Joliet, the good and bad. Where did you live? Were you here for school? What? Where? Why? When? What? 😉

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  42. Hey June, in your survey I am from NC. I’m at this moment in Florida reading your Blog. I went to Montana this summer and I read your blog from my phone every day. Also, I was born in Rhode Island, does that kind of count?

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  43. Wow, book-name calling already? I feel loved! Like, really, in case anyone thought that was sarcasm-y. My nickname in high school was Webster, but people suspiciously stopped calling me that when they started inviting me places, so it’s hard to tell sometimes.
    And is anyone else somewhat disturbed by the idea of breasts in teacups? Get out of that teacup, breasts! You are not a beverage!

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  44. One never knows where the conversation is going to wander on any given day here. I’m so glad I found this blog; I’m much more entertained during my workday now.

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  45. I read all of the comments last night. You’d a thunk I’d a written down the names of the peeps I was going to give a shout out to, eh? No. So from memory, and it’s not a very good one, I will wing it.
    Hi Kate! My sister lives in Brecksville too. She’s been there about 27 years and loves it.
    Hi Stephanie! My daughter lives in Berea. She also has a part time job at one of the most iconic stores in the city.
    Hi Susanne! I was in Newnan last August for my niece’s wedding. She was married at Dunaway Gardens. I love down town Newnan!

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  46. I know of another reader in Montana. I told her about your blog, and I know she reads it. We email each other about it from time to time. Email as in: ‘Hey, did you read Bye-Bye-Pie’s last blog about the what-za-hoo-zits? Wasn’t that hilarious?’
    So yeah, I know that you officially have more than one reader in Montana. And yes, they are all pretty much admiring the moose out there. My friend calls it ‘the next to the last frontier’. She tried to sell some secondhand jigsaw puzzles out there in a yard sale, and people there wanted to know what they were… like they’d never seen one before. Then they wouldn’t buy them. I think she had a table-load for a only a couple of dollars, and one old cowboy hung around hoping they’d go down on the price. She didn’t. The puzzles are still at her house. Not that all Montana natives are like that… just the ones in Anaconda.
    Anyway, I’m from Arkansas. I didn’t get to join in on Wisdom Wednesday because I got to your blog late, late, late Tuesday night. I never make it under the deadline.
    Just so you know, we love you in Montana/Arkansas… at least we two do…and not in a creepy, stalkerish kind of way…

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  47. Jan, I’m pretty sure I was only there a few months of my life. I don’t remember any of it, but I’m still proud to say it was my birthplace. My mom told me the hospital I was born at has since been torn down? Does that sound familiar? I don’t even know if that’s correct. My mom had 7 kids. She gets us all mixed up.
    After that it was Lockport, then Rockford, then Chicago. And then to the land of the never ending sun…except for this week.

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  48. Donna (was it?) from Mt. Gambier, South Australia…I totally know where that is. Lived in Adelaide for a year and a half…of course had to visit the blue lake. Sorry everybody (else) for being bloody boring but Australia is where I want to be FROM. And how did June make it to Mt. Gambier? Do you know that if you go to Mt. Gambier from Greensboro and then go one more mile you get closer to Greensboro? I mean, it’s that far away. 24 hours in the air…PLUS airport time. Well, maybe they’ve got it down to 20 hours these days.

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  49. Another lurker from MT. I read your blog almost every day and I LOVE it. I only see moose once in a while, but I do admire the sky.

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  50. I’m usually an active member of the Self-righteous Grammar PO-lice but blew this one apparently. I’ll go get my Little Brown and hit myself on the head with it. Right after I look up further/farther.

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  51. PJ, I think Siren was questioning her own use of further/farther. Your grammar looks righteous to me. What say you, Siren?
    June must be sleeping in today. Deservedly.

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  52. PJ, I think Siren was questioning her own use of further/farther. Your grammar looks righteous to me. What say you, Siren?
    June must be sleeping in today. Deservedly.

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  53. PJ, I think Siren was questioning her own use of further/farther. Your grammar looks righteous to me. What say you, Siren?
    June must be sleeping in today. Deservedly.

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  54. June’s still tired from posting of all your photos several days ago. That was a killer job for her and a really great read/look for us.

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  55. June’s still tired from posting of all your photos several days ago. That was a killer job for her and a really great read/look for us.

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  56. June’s still tired from posting of all your photos several days ago. That was a killer job for her and a really great read/look for us.

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  57. I always thought when someone tells you to be quiet because Mom’s sleeping, you’re supposed to go stand silently beside the bed and stare unblinkingly at her until she wakes up.

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  58. That is just about what we all did last week, Siren, when June told us to STOP COMMENTING, and all went immediately quiet. Bet she felt powerful. “POWERFUL!”

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  59. That is just about what we all did last week, Siren, when June told us to STOP COMMENTING, and all went immediately quiet. Bet she felt powerful. “POWERFUL!”

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  60. That is just about what we all did last week, Siren, when June told us to STOP COMMENTING, and all went immediately quiet. Bet she felt powerful. “POWERFUL!”

    Like

  61. Hey, June…got some insider information for you. The person that told me about your blog lives in New Hampshire. She’s moving to Rhode Island in June (ha, in June), so if you don’t yet have a reader in RI, you will soon. Of course, you may lose your only reader in NH? Anyway, thought you’d like to know. Btw…you read her blog too, I think. Also, back in the 80’s when I was waitressing, I waited on Peter Falk (Colombo). We had a conversation, but I don’t recall anything of it, except his exceptional liquid L’s. I’m a fool for speech impediments :^)
    Your friend, Karin NOT Carin, in sunny SoCal

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  62. Siren ~ that is exactly what my youngest used to do. It would freak me the f*uck out!
    She would also tell her big sister that she was going to stare at her all night long…just to bug her.
    Moments like that make me feel like a good mom.

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