Health, June's stupid life

Blogebrity Rehab

Some man just jogged by who looked exactly like Dr. Drew. Could Dr. Drew have a spring home in Greensboro? And could his spring home be a one-story 1950s ranch, since that's all this neighborhood has? This all seems very likely. Perhaps I'm now hallucinating on top of everything else.

"She seemed fine until she started hallucinating Dr. Drew jogging everywhere."

Anyway, it turns out Jazzercise is kind of fun. I know! There was this old lady there who was like a Jazzercise groupie. She goes every day, staying for two sessions in a row. She knows all the songs, and was belting out Beyonce with the instructor. Anyway, she was killing me while I tried not to die. I realize that sentence made no sense. Why is Dr. Drew handing me my coffee?

My charming and not-at-all clautrophobic MRI is at 4:30, and I'm sure I won't hear anything about what they found till at least Monday. My next-door neighbor Peg is helping me paint the dining room tomorrow, as I have had the paint sitting in its can for 47 years. So at least that will distract me, and it is nice of her to come over and help, seeing as Edsel bit her yesterday.

How are those manners classes going, Edsel?

Oh, he didn't BITE her bite her. He was jumping up and down like a mad man, because Peg coming over is akin to the Second Coming, as is the mailman coming over, or my friend The Other June, or the ant exterminator, or the meter man. Really Edsel is pretty ecstatic to see anyone. He is kind of sociable other than the vicious biting.

Really, though, he was on the way down from a "glory be!" jump and his mouth just happened to land on poor Peg's hand. Still.

For the first two years of coming over, Peg had to deal with Tallulah acting the fool, and now Talu galumphs to the door and wags politely. As soon as she gets normal I get another idiot puppy.

Edscares
I shouldn't complain about old "Let me greet you wif m'fangs," though, as he has been a sentinel, following me and making sure I don't stick my head in the oven this week.

You know how Tallulah has never been what you'd call empathy dog? Edsel is the opposite. He is all feelings, all the time. This week, if I go into the bathroom, he clicks after me. The closet? There's Edsel, bein' all Tim Gunn. In the meantime, Tallulah has had a lot of humping Winston to catch up on.

I guess I had better go start removing the metal from my body for the MRI. You know how I have the multiple piercings. If Dr. Drew is my technician, I will be blogging at you from some institution tomorrow.

 

117 thoughts on “Blogebrity Rehab”

  1. Fun. I just wanted to add (because I kept giggling before I could fall asleep last night)
    Dorkish Daffy
    Chumps Ahoy
    Jewjyfruit (sorry)

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  2. I like Letha’s suggestion (way above me)can you make some Edsel, Lulu, and “cat” coffee cups? Edsel and his Hollywood smiles would be kinda entrancing.

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  3. You know, even the Google ads on June’s blogs are educational:
    Parrot Training 101: how to stop your parrot from pooping on you.
    Poopermint Patty to you, Marv.

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  4. Bah! Liked this last round girls. Very well played.
    Hershey Squirter
    7up Yours
    Dr. Pecker
    Faygo away

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  5. My cat Dillon was my very best animal buddy when I went through the big D. He ended up turning my now hubby from cat disliker to cat lover. Hope you & Marvin can get through this somewhat sane but he should get on with it & move . Better for you both.

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