Thirteen years of…something

Dadd 
Today is my 13th wedding anniversary. So there's that.

By the way, Marvin did not have a bunch of plastic surgery after our wedding. This is me with dad. In case you were slow.

So because today could potentially suck, I have decided to accentuate the positive and list many reasons why I am glad I married Marvin even though it didn't work out.

1. Mt. Everest. Before I met Marvin, I did not know one thing about Mt. ridiculous Everest. Now I can tell you all about sherpas, and base camps, and Tenzing Norgay, and I have no idea why this information would ever be useful in my life, because you know what an adventure-seeker I am and how I cannot wait to clip on my crampons and head up that hill, but I am still glad I learned a new thing. Including the word "crampons." And that I saw many many many documentaries that showed us dead frozen climbers.

2.iPods. If I had never married Marvin, I never would have been interested in owning an iPod, and Marvin was, like, the first iPod owner in the country, practically. He was Adam of the iPod. I would have thought an iPod was some kind of computer pea or something. Which makes tons of sense. But I don't know what I'd DO without my pod of i now. Love it! Can listen to Slap My Bitch Up any time I want!

3. Books of stamps. I remember thinking Marvin was such a grownup, having books of stamps. It was a thing that would never occur to me, to plan ahead and have a whole gaggle o'stamps. In the past I had always had a letter and went around saying, "Does anyone have a stamp?" and more than half the time whatever I was mailing never got sent. Due to the stamp thing. And speaking of not mailing stuff:

4. Paying bills. You know, on time. I remember I once got one of my 349483 department store credit card bills and the minimum payment due was so exorbitant due to the part where I never paid my bills, that I circled the amount due and wrote "Yeah, right!" next to it. They canceled my card after that, on a shocking note. But Marvin always said paying bills on time is a matter of pride, and do you know I have remained fiscally responsible? Ish? Since he's been gone?

5. Ruined songs. Thanks to Marvin, I will always sing the wrong words to songs because he always sang the wrong words thinking he was high-larious. Elton John's Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me will always be "Don't let your son go down on me." And Shower the People You Love with Love is permanently, "Showerlee people." Because Marvin is mature. He has also instilled in me a deep hatred for any singer who takes one syllable and makes it go on for 87 minutes. "Iiiiiiiifffffff Iiii-ye-ye-ye should stayyyyy-ay-ay-ay…."

6. Rush. Okay, that isn't remotely true. I will never embrace stupid Rush and their stupid songs and stupid stupid stupid shenanigans.

So I guess things could be worse. I could wish the last 13 years had never happened. But I am glad they did. My wedding day was still the best day of my life and I'm glad I married Marvin even if we weren't meant to last until our golden years.

Litter happens, you know?

202 thoughts on “Thirteen years of…something

  1. Why no photos of the boob cupcakes? Especially if with melting nipples! Even more exciting!
    Treat that kitten right, Hulk.
    June, you are classy indeed to come up with positive things about your ex. There was something once (historians, need your help here) about you and Marvin at night in the dark perhaps during a thunderstorm?? when you were bantering and/or maybe you were mad or something (vague enough?) but then he said something really funny and clever and cracked you up. I liked him best at that moment.

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  2. I got Marvin’s joke. It is similar to when I tell my ONLY child that she is my favorite daughter.
    Makes her laugh every time.

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  3. Someone said something about the party this weekend that I wanted to respond to/clear up, but first I had to read all the other comments, and now I don’t remember what was said about the party that I wanted to clarify. Never mind.

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  4. Now I remember: there was not a former mayor there at the party, but Hulk’s uncle used to be mayor of Saginaw and I told his mother the current mayor is expected at the party. There would be a dynasty of Saginaw mayors honoring June and Hulk. Unfortunately Annnanandamy and her husband did not come to the party. From the comments she did not know where the party was, but I don’t know why they didn’t just drive around Saginaw Township until they found the party with the live band in the back yard.

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  5. Hulk (Now everyone thinks I'm mean to cats...I'm not mean! I just don't like cats! It's not a character flaw...) says:

    I didn’t scare the cat!
    How did I scare the cat??

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  6. Hulk (Now everyone thinks I'm mean to cats...I'm not mean! I just don't like cats! It's not a character flaw...) says:

    I didn’t scare the cat!
    How did I scare the cat??

    Like

  7. Hulk (Now everyone thinks I'm mean to cats...I'm not mean! I just don't like cats! It's not a character flaw...) says:

    I didn’t scare the cat!
    How did I scare the cat??

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  8. Great picture! My sister is going through the same thing and her anniversary was a few weeks ago. It’s not easy and you’re handling it with grace and composure.

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  9. Duffy I agree with your synopsis of June- she does NOT need to diet, do anything different with her hair and drats that DB for making her think she looked like Phyllis Diller pre-surgery. So not true!
    And Mother was so sweet emailing me for photos and asking me to pray for June’s safe drive home. What a Mom! Funny story though – in the 2 emails I got from Mother, she referred to her daughter as June in one email and as her real name in the other email. June even has Mother confused as to her name!

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  10. thought you superimposed kenny rogers head on marvins body there for a minute…
    can i tell you a story about slap my bitch up…when i lived behind fenway park in boston, this is also where all the nightclubs were. And then, one day, the slap my bitch up band was playing below my window and because i am lazy and ice cream obsessed (well, mildly) my husbein (now ex) and i thought we’d meander and get our ice cream at kenmore square then catch this band who of course, were packed up by the time we waddled back. but, i do like to request that song at weddings- shake things up a bit. sorry no caps-too tired. happy birthday junie!!

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  11. June, You are such a special person with such a sweet heart!!

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  12. You know, if I recall, your man Giovanni quoted Rush in your class commencement address…
    “If you choose not to decide you still have made a choice.”

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  13. June, my anniversary is 1.5 weeks after my birthday! Ack! Thank you for giving me a good example of how to deal with it. I will try to list all the positive things in our marriage. I hope you treated yourself extra well today.

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