Roger

Rog

I was trying not to mention this, in the hopes he'd come home.

Honestly, I am crushed under the weight of the three thousand things that have gone wrong in my life. I cannot take one more damn thing.

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Author: June

At one point, I was sort of hot, in a "she's 27 and probably a 7" kind of a way. Now I'm old and have to develop a charming personality. Guess how that's going.

190 thoughts on “Roger”

  1. I’m sorry June – I know that was an uncalled for comment…I didn’t mean to sound like a bitch. But the holiday season is just bringing out the worst in me in this year and coming back to work after a crappy vacation makes me a little extra crazy. Sorry. I do hope Roger gets his butt home!
    Anita – I typed “Ima gonna” intentionally. Didn’t mean to run nails on a chalkboard.
    My day is going from bad to worse as I’m making a trip to the cemetary to put up a tree for my three grandchildren buried there. I guess I’m taking out my feelings on everyone else today. I’ll shut up now.

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  2. Aw, Mary V. That was a brave apology. 🙂
    Hope the cemetery is nice and peaceful.

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  3. Roger, please get your large arse home! My own kitties have been pissed off for months since I quit letting them go outside. And did you know pissed off cats means that they start pissing ON THINGS??
    Bastards.
    Also, in the epic fail column goes my attempt at Tee’s crock pot candy. Tee honey, I have no idea what went wrong, but I made the biggest flipping burnt mess you have ever seen (or smelled). Matter of fact, I can STILL smell it. That burnt smell does tend to linger.
    As does cat piss.
    Off to go make tamales. At least it is something I know how to do.

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  4. Last year when we did the TNR for all the ferals next door – they turned their little noses up at the tuna and then the cat food we placed in the traps. Scambled eggs though – they were all over that! Might want to put a few plates out for Roger.
    *hugs* Mary – this holiday season surely is sucking for everyone.

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  5. What a bummer, June. If this sort of thing keeps up you are going to need a post tag called June Can’t Keep a Pet. Sad is what that is. Surely Roger will come home soon. A new year is right around the corner – yay for that!
    Mary V, you are having a hard time. It’s ok to vent a little here. This is as good a place as any because everyone here is kind-hearted. I heart this blog.
    Original Joann, I’m sorry to hear about your mother-in-law. I’ve wondered what was going on and I’ve been checking in on your blog. Hang in there.

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  6. What a bummer, June. If this sort of thing keeps up you are going to need a post tag called June Can’t Keep a Pet. Sad is what that is. Surely Roger will come home soon. A new year is right around the corner – yay for that!
    Mary V, you are having a hard time. It’s ok to vent a little here. This is as good a place as any because everyone here is kind-hearted. I heart this blog.
    Original Joann, I’m sorry to hear about your mother-in-law. I’ve wondered what was going on and I’ve been checking in on your blog. Hang in there.

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  7. What a bummer, June. If this sort of thing keeps up you are going to need a post tag called June Can’t Keep a Pet. Sad is what that is. Surely Roger will come home soon. A new year is right around the corner – yay for that!
    Mary V, you are having a hard time. It’s ok to vent a little here. This is as good a place as any because everyone here is kind-hearted. I heart this blog.
    Original Joann, I’m sorry to hear about your mother-in-law. I’ve wondered what was going on and I’ve been checking in on your blog. Hang in there.

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  8. OH June, I’m so sorry!!
    I will try to communicate with him when I can get the baby down for a nap and it is quiet. No promises, I’ve been trying to reach your Winnie ever since the last time, and haven’t been able to.
    Someone mentioned the scrambled eggs or tuna, but I’ve always had luck using Jack Mackeral-lawdy it stinks but I’ve never seen a cat or a dog turn it down.
    This is a link to the prayer that I always use for lost pets.
    http://www.churchyear.net/prayer/prayerforalostpet.html

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  9. Mary, it’s a tough time of year. Hugs to you.
    So glad Larry is doing better. Is he hopping yet?
    What’s up with the tamale tradition? I feel like I should have one now. I don’t think I ever have. Shocking I know.

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  10. MrsHBLjr, it worked fine and was funny. Loved that you included the special Santa and loved the pic of June you chose.

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  11. MrsHBLjr, it worked fine and was funny. Loved that you included the special Santa and loved the pic of June you chose.

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  12. MrsHBLjr, it worked fine and was funny. Loved that you included the special Santa and loved the pic of June you chose.

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  13. Mary V and OJ-
    Also sending hugs to you both-
    This time of year is especially difficult when we’re grieving loved ones….

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  14. MrsHBLjr-
    Am I the only one who reads LBJ?!
    Anyhoo-
    I LOVE Elf Yourself and THAT was the best I’ve seen!

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  15. Hugs to Mary V and OJ. The Christmas holidays are such a difficult time when you are grieving.
    Mrs HBLjr, thank you for sharing Elf Yourself. On seeing it, my first thought was, “Boy, those characters look like Tallulah and Roger.” before I caught on. Obviously, I’m not the brightest bulb in the pack. Can I blame it on lack of sleep?

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  16. Loved the Elf Yourself!
    Mary V and OJ, I’m so sorry. This is my first Christmas without my mama and I miss her so much I want to crawl under the bed and hide until the New Year. My mama made THE BEST Peanut Butter Fudge and my husband and I have been doing our best to make it but failing miserably!

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  17. Heather P-hugs for you also!
    Good for you, carrying on your mama’s tradition-even if it didn’t turn out, it’s still honouring her!
    I haven’t been able to bake my mom’s goodies at Christmas and she’s been gone almost 7 years…was too weepy just thinking about it-
    I’m finally doing them this year and am happy, at peace and looking forward to the bake fest-

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  18. You guys are depressing the SHIT out of me…

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  19. You guys are depressing the SHIT out of me…

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  20. You guys are depressing the SHIT out of me…

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  21. I’m just so sorry. Sorry that your life is hard. As a person who has also had a hard year, in different ways, I am aching a little for you today. I have had two cats go missing, and with both, when I finally gave up hope, they found their way back to me. The first one had been stuck in a tree for a week. The second one had a medical issue that made him disoriented and he couldn’t find his way home. Some nice people found him and called us after he had been gone for two weeks. I will send my hope out into the universe for you.

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  22. I’m not sure why you’re standing in my doorway June (does that mean something?) but if you’re there, I’ll be sure to not hug you. I know how you hate that.
    Thanks everyone…I will be surely glad when the holidays are over. And my thoughts to everyone who is hurting this season. I wouldn’t wish that feeling on my worst enemy.
    Ok, maybe I would.

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  23. well that just sucks the big one.
    as my coworker said, “2011 you can suck my d1ck”
    i’m sorry june. prayers being said. that would be after i get struck my lightening.

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  24. Oh, JUNE. (I know that’s a very, VERY helpful comment there.)
    You have been through so, so much this year. This is just too much for one person to have to handle. If there was ever a time to eat an entire cake for breakfast and not feel a damn bit bad about it, this is it. I will keep thinking “Roger and Winnie come home” thoughts for you.

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  25. This is from Deb on the Pie on the Face Facebook groupie page…
    I have an idea for a gift for June. Why don’t we all post her website to other sites (not blogs) that we visit a lot and try to double her readership by June 2012? Maybe that way she can get more of that Google money and she won’t be $600 billion overdrawn. Someone could post this to the blog so everyone can get involved. I don’t post over there because I’m afraid of June finding errors.

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  26. Standing in your doorway, June. Since you were gone for a long time taking Lucy to Kentucky, there’s always the chance that Roger did come home and then took off for awhile again, right? So maybe it’s not like he’s really been gone for 3-4 days? Wish I lived closer and could help you look. Any chance he jumped in the trunk when you headed to TinyTown, or accidentally got in DW’s or Laurie’s car or something? Grasping at straws here, I know– but for what it’s worth I also had a cat that was missing for almost a week before we discovered that it was just a block away and didn’t know how to get home. I had put a giant sign out in front of the house that could be read by passing cars (no phone number)– and that’s what worked, a neighbor came and left a note.

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  27. OJ, I just read your most recent post on your blog. What a beautiful tribute to your MIL.

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  28. OJ, your post about your mother-in-law was wonderful tribute to her. My sympathy to your entire family. It is never east to lose a loved one, but during the holidays is especially hard.
    So many in the Pie family hurting. Prayers for you all.

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  29. So sorry, June. I’ve certainly had cats come back after many many days–acting like ‘What you all up in my face about? I just needed a little space.” Come home, kitty.

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  30. Mary V, I am sorrier than I could possibly say for your loss. Every grief is enormous but some griefs are more enormous than others. Yours would bring anybody to their knees… it’s heartbreaking times infinity.
    I have to admit that when I read your very first post I thought an indignant “humphf!!” but it just goes to show that we never know what other people are going through and that we (well, I) should try to be more compassionate instead of automatically feeling irritated. I apologize, and I’ll be thinking of you as you go through your difficult day.

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  31. Much love to everyone going through painful losses at this emotional time of the year. May 2012 bring peace and comfort to you.

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  32. Hey…’member that time I married my mom?

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  33. Maybe you and the dogs could take a walk around the neighborhood this afternoon and Roger would join you. You have probably already tried that.

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  34. Hulk-
    Making everyone laugh, gag, snort etc. through the tears and craptastic times-
    Keep it up Hulky!

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  35. Didn’t comment today – sorry, one of THOSE days – but am willing Roger home. The little shit, making you fret.

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  36. June, so sorry! I logged on this AM and saw the post, then popped back after work hoping to hear some good news.
    I’m praying for Roger’s very speedy return.
    *Waving from the doorway* cuz I know you dont like hugs much.

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  37. I keep refreshing hoping to hear that Roger is home where he belongs! It’s just not right. Love to all of you, especially those who are hurting right now.

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  38. For the love of humanity, please explain the scissors!!

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  39. Oh, June! I had to read the post twice. Just could not believe my eyes. I am so sorry and have said a little prayer that Roger (and Winnie) returns home soon. My thoughts and prayers for all of you who are struggling with loss at this time of year. On Wednesday it will be five years that my mom unexpectedly passed away.

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  40. My sister’s cat, Evelyn, disappeared last winter. 6 weeks later, she came sashaying back like nothing had happened. Turns out she preferred living with the neighbors where she can be an overfed, over-indulged only pet.
    Talk to your neighbors. One of them knows where Rodger is.

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  41. All I know about the scissors is that my grandma did it and my mom too. They were from Germany. It might be some strange German tradition, I don’t know. I do know that our cats always came back. I don’t know if they have to be German cats or what.

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  42. Is Francis’s grave untouched? Put the Angry couch/chair/chaise out in the yard (you are in NC after all and its ok to have indoor furniture out of doors) with treats and rub your unclothed chonies all over it.
    Roger is a man he will be back.. or maybe DB may show up?

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  43. Is Francis’s grave untouched? Put the Angry couch/chair/chaise out in the yard (you are in NC after all and its ok to have indoor furniture out of doors) with treats and rub your unclothed chonies all over it.
    Roger is a man he will be back.. or maybe DB may show up?

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  44. Is Francis’s grave untouched? Put the Angry couch/chair/chaise out in the yard (you are in NC after all and its ok to have indoor furniture out of doors) with treats and rub your unclothed chonies all over it.
    Roger is a man he will be back.. or maybe DB may show up?

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  45. Sending lots of returning-cat thoughts from Ontario, if I could I’d come down there & help look for Roger. Don’t know if it helps but it can’t hurt. I’m sure hoping everything takes a turn for the better for you!

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  46. Oh my, now I must tell you the tale of Jake the Riverboat Gambler, a handsome black and white kitty with a dapper mustache. Jakey got hauled all over the state of Oregon whilst I spent time with a ne’er do-well husband. At one stop, the hub’s sister’s house, ol’ Jakey took off for greener pastures. I was devastated. It nearly destroyed me as I was beginning to realize that I had taken a risk that was not healthy for me or my son.
    What can you do? You call and call. You put up posters, there was no interwebs then so no Craig’s List. And then, life has to go on. We had to go get our own house. I had such a terrible sad.
    We got settled (ish), and got another kitty. A pregger kitty as it turned out, who blessed us with many pretty babies. Out of the blue, the SIL calls to report that Jake the Riverboat Gambler has returned after his seven month adventure much the worse for wear but still kickin’.
    Since we were at top cat capacity, we pawned him off on a family who “really didn’t care for cats”. Some were terrified of them. The very first night he was with them, he climbed in the bed with the terrified woman and she loved him for many, many days after until the day he drew his last breath.
    Cats are amazing creatures, and I do believe that they pick us rather than the opposite. Roger might be a little P.O’d about the damm jingle collar, and Mom’s attention to a dog that doesn’t even live with you guys, not to mention a weekend without everyone while Mom spent time with another dog.
    Trust Roger. Spend time making the house peaceful. He will come home. Possibly for a Christmas miracle. Cats do the damnedest things.

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  47. Oh, and I really want to know what the hell the open scissors trick is about. Just sayin’.

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  48. You might want to invest in some Purrfect Fence so those little cat jerks can go out but not take off. It is expensive but worth it. The only jail break we’ve had was when we put the grill too close to the house and the cats jumped from the the top of the grill to the roof. Luckily, the two that figured out how to escape were so institutionalized that one retraced his route to get back in (and then pretended he’d been there all along) and the other sat outside the fence and cried until we came to get him. Keeping fingers crossed for Roger.

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  49. I am not kidding. I know what you mean about one more thing. Read my blog lately?
    Good grief. I’ve had to let Misha go to another family, I’m getting a divorce at Christmas time, and I can’t seem to find a place to live. And, now Roger?
    Anywho, Roger is out Christmas caroling and will be home shortly. I just know it. It has to be so.

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  50. Never heard of scissor being good luck or anything in Germany. All my scissors are bought over here, but I have knifes from Germany if they will help…

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  51. “2011 you can suck my d1ck” second that
    original joann…what you said in your last post
    FUDDDDDDDDDDGGGGGGGGGE was all I could think when I saw this post.
    Janera…I am also divorcing. Just signed the papers on Dec 1. I never thought that divorce would be a part of my life story but that is ok. I will rebuild and be ok and so will you. I love that Fernando Ortega song you have on your blog.

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  52. Well this did not brighten my Tuesday:(
    Roger, get your ass home NOW.
    Mary V., I’m sure your day will not get any better, but I bet you have some beautiful angels on your shoulder who love you very, very much.

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  53. June, love your blog. Love Edsel, Tallulah and Roger. Cats do not need to go outside. If Roger comes back, please, please keep him inside. I hope he’s safe.

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