Has anyone else noted that the Secret brand has taken over all the deodorants? I am about to run out of my Secret Outlast Completely Clean, which every time I look at that name on my deodorant I think of this song:

.

Okay, that video was really annoying. Just play the damn song.

My POINT is, I'm about to run out of my Outkast deodorant, and I am not brand loyal at all, really, so I will happily look at your Arid Extra Drys or your Sures and you know what? There will be, like, four of those and 49939303 Secret scents. Why?

A few years back, I went a whole year without spending money, and I bought a particular scent of (Secret, of course) deodorant that smelled exactly like a new doll, and every time I used it I was in agony, but I had to live through the whole container because I was Not Spending. For months I was Baby Alive.

I have no idea how I got off on this tangent.

My point is, running low on deodorant. June's blog. Come for the stupid thoughts. Stay for 40 paragraphs on the stupid thought.

I was GETTING on this blog to tell you about how Ned and I had the world's most irritating evening last night, when all we were doing was trying to get to a movie called Tim's Vermeer, which was really good, but it's like God and everyone on God's staff was trying everything possible to not get us there. But now I am running late because I was telling you about deodorant and also IMing with my ex-spouse on Facebook about absolutely nothing (Rush, his college roommate, someone named Daisy and someone else named Taisy) and now I have six seconds to get to work.

So I will leave you with this deep question. The other day I was talking about how as a kid I took ballet for four years. Then one week I missed ballet because I had the chicken pox (which still vexes me to this day. See SHINGLES), and when I got back to ballet the next week, all the students knew the positions in English and French. I kind of already knew this info, but we'd clearly been given a formal lesson, the point being that later that spring we were all to head to Detroit to take this test where you do all the ballet positions in French and English, and if you pass the test you get to go on to toe shoes.

I'd been OBSESSED with getting toe shoes, and all I would have had to do is ask the teacher for five minutes after class to run down the positions with me, sort of give me a refresher, and I assure you I'd have been caught up.

Instead, I panicked because I felt left behind, so after class I told my parents, "I don't want to do ballet anymore," and guess who was sick of recitals and rehearsals and buying me leotards, because they were all, Okay! Great! And that was the end of my stellar ballet career.

I always wish I had continued it, because I loved it, and I could now be a very snooty retired ballerina who lived on coffee and cigarettes and whose feet were all fucked up, and I desperately wish that were my story but it's not. I'm just some schlub who dropped out of ballet before her OBVIOUS talent was realized.

So, my Q to you is, what have you given up that you wish you'd stuck with? Can you take it back up again? How much do you dare me to join some 5th-graders at a ballet class? I wonder if Secret makes a You Failed at Being a Ballerina scent?

0 thoughts on “Now in fresh, you failed-at-life scent!

  1. Linda in CO, hoping BBP will accept my comments again now that I replaced the keyboard I spilled tea on. says:

    I wish I could have stuck with WW, developed that lifestyle change they talk about rather than going back to crap food as soon as I lost some weight. I was incredibly healthy, happy, and looked great, and I really want that back in my life again. I’m back at WW again, but not feeling the motivation.
    I also would like to get back to the times when I exercised a lot and really enjoyed it. It’s been different things over the years (aerobics, biking, running, swimming, tennis, volleyball) and I would love to be doing any one of them again. I got winded today walking up a hill.

    Like

  2. Teresa says:

    Writing. I used to write all the time. Poems, short stories and journals. I even won a couple of journalism awards in high school. I don’t know why I quit. But I did…

    Like

  3. Megsie says:

    Carol,
    Where do you do the Masters swimming??? Seriously!

    Like

  4. Carol in Mpls says:

    Would like to return to:
    * Adult ballet (did it as a youth/teenager, and, yes, even did the pointe shoes — as a sweet reminder, they hang on my bedroom doorknob)
    * Masters swimming (in the pool at 6am for an hour, with the coach, and a different workout every day)
    * Longer hair (my grey stripe would be long and not bangs)
    And, other things…

    Like

  5. BStar says:

    I wish I had tried harder on my first marriage. I would love to be one of those couples who stayed married for life.
    I shouldn’t have given up on piano and banjo. I may take the banjo up again upon retirement. What? You need manual dexterity? Shoot!
    I gave up on my art and I WILL take that up again seriously with lessons and everything when I retire.

    Like

  6. Just Paula says:

    PSA: Do not get vanilla scented deodorant. You will smell like you are smuggling cupcakes. Trust.

    Like

  7. Just Paula says:

    Wait. God has a STAFF?

    Like

  8. Nadster says:

    I gave up horseback riding when I was a kid because I was scared but didn’t know how to admit that/ask for help. I loved horses but was always anxious getting on their backs. So I dissed the whole thing pretending I wasn’t into it. Today I am the lucky and immensely grateful owner of my horse Mickey and have been riding almost daily for more than two years. And. Loving. Every. Minute. It’s an amazing thrill to bond with an animal in such a deep way and to learn something new and experience such a big shift in priorities and abilities in my 40s. Just when I thought I knew it all.

    Like

  9. Brenda says:

    I do dare you to take up ballet again. My daughter started ballet last year (okay so she was 14 but still it was late to start) and she looooves it and it is beautiful to watch. I am sure it will all come back to you. I did not dance as a child but I took up hip hop when I was in my forties and did it for three years until all the other adults left the class and it was just me and a bunch of 12 year olds but no wait, that’s not helping my argument. Just do it. Dooooo it!

    Like

  10. Sadie says:

    Seriously? Between concussions and golf cart deaths, maybe I’m glad I never took up golf. I mean, I’m not that coordinated to begin with. Did I ever tell you about the time I walked into a metal pole in junior high or the time I walked into a wall at a client’s office? Really, I have no business even thinking about taking up golf. And alcohol WASN’T even involved!

    Like

  11. Amish Annie says:

    I can’t parallel park to save my life. Have missed so many good parking spots because of this.
    PSS and Sadie, just got back from the grocery store. Smiled when I went past the deodorant aisle. But then I thought, huh, I will check out the Tom’s of Maine in the organic section and ended up buying one for me and one for partner. I had been reading about aluminum in deodorant so the conversation here today just propelled me to finally buy the safer version.
    Golf sucks, although if you live by a golf course and collect the stray balls you can make some pretty good bank.

    Like

  12. sandra says:

    I may have to try that Tom deodorant. I bought some natural lemongrass deodorant and ended up smelling like lemony stinky sweat. Not good.
    I wish I had never quit working out so much. After my divorce I went Zumba crazy and got in great shape. Then i started working full time and dealing with the whole single mom thing and let exercise slowly fade away. I started going again, but need to do more.

    Like

  13. June Gardens says:

    I know someone who died falling off a golf cart. Golf is dangerous, man.

    Like

  14. KellyPie says:

    The one time I played a round of golf, I ended up with a concussion.
    Of COURSE alcohol was involved.

    Like

  15. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    That’s funny, Sadie.
    I’m just reminded of a perfect parallel park I did a few weeks ago, in NYC, no less. I was so proud of myself and my daughter had to hear about it. Endlessly. Kind of like you nice people now. It was perfect, I tell you. Zip, zip…in between parked cars. Proud, is what I was.

    Like

  16. Sadie says:

    When I took my driver’s test as a teenager in our car with a manual transmission, I was so nervous when it came to parallel parking that my left leg shook uncontrollably each time I tried to let out the clutch. The DMV tester kept telling me to relax and try again, but each attempt ended with the same result. Because I had passed the previous parts of the road test and he felt sorry for me, he said he would give me my license if I promised never to attempt to parallel park. I’ve kept my promise all these many years. No parallel parking for me. And I can just think of the stories he shared with his coworkers at the end of the day.

    Like

  17. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    WWII Leader!

    Like

  18. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    Davida! My sister from another mother!
    My parallel parking is the butt of jokes, but while I was learning to drive I was aces at it. Might of had something to do with my instructor in the seat next to me. Left to my own devices, I stink. Thankfully, we don’t do much of that in my area.
    I swear I am a good driver, otherwise!
    P.S. Seven should be about 20 now, or at least late, late teens. So cool that he drummed for his mom.

    Like

  19. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    Good switch, Sadie. I’m sure you smell just fine!

    Like

  20. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    Being a good Leader takes a lot of time and effort. I spent hours preparing and traveling to and from. This was in addition to a full time job, a long work commute and two-school aged children to take care of. After a year of leading an evening meeting and a Sunday morning meeting, my health began to decline from all of the day-to-day stress, so something had to go. I miss it, but I don’t miss the work.

    Like

  21. Sadie says:

    Go mom of Missus B! I love it.

    Like

  22. Amish Annie says:

    Just watched the trailer for Tim’s Vermeer. Looks good. Also love that the trailer is within a gilded picture frame.

    Like

  23. June Gardens says:

    There's a guy in my row at work, Hulk, who golfs, and he told me it's the best and worst feeling to do it, sometimes all in one day. But that you can't stop doing it, either. Golf. It's like heroin for white middle-class guys.

    Like

  24. Hulk says:

    Dude. You don’t want to take up golf. It is maddening.

    Like

  25. DB in MD says:

    MissusB is right. It’s never too late. I’m in my late 40s (GAH!) and in the last few years I’ve taken cake decorating classes, yoga, sewing (definitely not for me), knitting, etc. Oh, and I’ve even taken a few workshops at the Home Depot.

    Like

  26. MissusB says:

    My mom took up tap dancing in her 40s. She did a recital and everything. It’s never too late.

    Like

  27. Davida says:

    I saw Erykah perform here in Durham and her son was her drummer! I couldn’t believe he was that old! Time flies…

    Like

  28. Davida says:

    Me too Pamela Soul Sister! I also grew up in NYC and never had the desire to drive. I got my driver’s license at 38 when I moved to Durham, NC. I failed the road test in NYC twice because I couldn’t parallel park. I passed the test in Durham because they did not ask me to parallel park! Now I love to drive and can park like a champ. If I knew I would like driving so much I would have gotten my license YEARS ago!

    Like

  29. Sadie says:

    Jan, that cracked me up.

    Like

  30. Sadie says:

    I also made the switch to Tom’s of Maine after my siblings were discussing the aluminum in deodorant.
    What did I give up? Since I never took dance or music lessons, I never gave them up. I guess it would be tennis. We played it during phys ed in high school. Do they even have phys ed today? Anyway, I enjoyed it and even took a few lessons in my early twenties. Then stopped instead of continuing to practice. After that, I didn’t play because I didn’t want to look bad in front of other players. Dumb, I know.

    Like

  31. Jan says:

    For some reason I read this as:”I LOVED be a WWII leader.” I read the whole comment and thought WTF? Then I realized my mistake.

    Like

  32. Myssie1963 says:

    Something I wish I would have started was playing golf. My gym teacher in high school, on one of the rare occasions I actually attended PE, told the whole class that I had a natural talent and could be the next Nancy Lopez, who was a famous female golfer back in prehistoric times. He may have been blowing smoke up my ass, though, in hopes of getting me to come to class more often. He finally told me he would pass me as long as I never took any of his classes again. Good deal!

    Like

  33. Susan in Atlanta says:

    I just wish I had studied the things that come naturally to me: art and music. I felt that because I was already good at them, I should spend time learning other things I didn’t know how to do. I’m going to make sure my child doesn’t form the same opinion and delves into his talents!

    Like

  34. Kate says:

    I remember that post, because somehow the new doll scent thing got stuck in my head and now EVERY time I put on deodorant, I think of that. BTW, Dove deodorant is the best in the land.
    I wish I’d stuck with singing. I took lessons and did recitals and was in this Young Musicians program at a college when I was in middle and high school, and I had recitals and such and I was a good singer. I still sound better than your average singer in the shower or car, but I’ve lost my breathing techniques and range and it’s sad. I gave it up because I realized that I didn’t really want to be a singer as a profession so what was the point.

    Like

  35. Cyn in fl says:

    That’s it PSS! I know I’ll get rewarded in ways otter than money AND it will keep me accountable!!!
    Why don’t you do meetings any more????

    Like

  36. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    One more thing, then I am going to shut up and get some work done. I have concerns about the aluminum in deodorant. I gave it up after breast cancer (researched it and found some troubling science). I miss my Lady Speed Stick (favorite), but I use Toms of Maine now. Toms has a version that has a little aluminum in it, for those who need that protection, but it’s way less than other brands. My body responds pretty well to their non-aluminum kind. Something to think about.

    Like

  37. Amish Annie says:

    I always wanted to try kickboxing after seeing Say Anything.

    Like

  38. DeDe says:

    Billy Blanks Tae Bo videos.. I was so into them back in ’93-’94 and I was the fittest I have ever been. Dare I say I may have had a six pack back then in my mid-20s. Now, I have a keg rolling around my mid section here in my mid-40s. It’s not too late to go back and pick it up again, but life is so busy with two teenage girls! I also regret giving up on my piano lessons, and I am trying to convince my daughters not to give up violin after 4 years but they are ready to move on… breaks my heart a little every time I think about it.

    Like

  39. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    That’s it, Roxie’s Mom.
    For me, it was fear. I had to conquer my fears at 39. I had no choice but to face them. I am as proud of that license as I am my law degree, or even my children. I know it sounds crazy, especially to people who have been driving since they were teens, but really ranks up there for me.
    Sadly, my mother was never able to conquer her fears.

    Like

  40. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    I LOVED being a WW Leader. It was so personally rewarding to help people in that way. I used to put a lot of thought into my meetings, with interesting presentations and nice music to play during weigh-in. My classes were well-attended and I sold a lot of product. The money was mere pocket change. I got great feedback from my members and really seemed to encourage them. It was a great experience. Good luck, CYN…you can do it!

    Like

  41. Cyn in fl says:

    Thanks!!!!

    Like

  42. Roxie's Mom, Regrets, I've had a few . . . says:

    Maybe it’s the Freedom thing. Maybe what we most regret is that some sense of powerlessness or fear makes us quit or keeps us from starting in the first place. And what we are most proud of is taking control and getting that power back.

    Like

  43. My daughter is a new ballerina en pointe this year. It was thrilling to watch her perform! I wish that I hadn’t thought that the only careers available to me were teacher, librarian or secretary (all my Barbies were one of those). I would have gone to school for art and design. That is my joy unconfined. Not this meaningless sitting in front of a computer all day bs. (Plenty of time to catch up on blogs and make lists all day of what I want to create as soon as I get home and stay up all night.) Oh, that and I would have learned how to put on make up and use hair acoutrements because I have no clue.

    Like

  44. Roxie's Mom, Regrets, I've had a few . . . says:

    Good for you!

    Like

  45. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    Andre and Badu never married, but they did have a son together.

    Like

  46. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    But, the point is, I regret not having gotten my driver’s license much earlier in life!
    And my 73 year old native New Yorker mom NEVER got her license. She really regrets that now.

    Like

  47. DG from Niagara Falls says:

    Love Miss Jackson!

    Like

  48. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    I gave up learning how to drive as a teen. I grew up in NYC, where you did not need a car to get around. So I went through my 20s and 30s as a damn passenger (with a really good sense of direction and a gas card). It wasn’t until I moved to suburban New Jersey in August 2002, at the ripe old age of 39, that I finally got a license. I passed the road test the day before that Thanksgiving. Came home, showed my husband and immediately went back out to shop and run errands…on my own! I felt like the whole world opened up for me, and I had an enormous sense of independence and freedom that I had never felt before. I’ve had my license 13 years now, and I drive any chance I get. Love a road trip!

    Like

  49. DG from Niagara Falls says:

    Does healthy living count as giving something up? When I was 19, after being overweight through the oh so easy to be overweight high-school years—I finally lost over 50 pounds and boy was I on my way. But then I turned 21 and hello, beer. And by the time I was 23 I had gained it all back. And also piano, I took lessons for 8 years. I keep meaning to find someone who teaches it around here but no luck so far.

    Like

  50. Texas Kari says:

    Yoga. For several years before my daughter was born, I was a regular at a local yoga studio. I’m not very athletic, but oddly, I’m quite flexible. I loved it! I felt great and looked great. Then the studio moved to the other side of town and I had a baby and frankly, the stretching was hurty on my nursing chest, so I quit. I have occasionally gone to nearby classes since then, but have never liked them as much as the previous studio.
    sigh. I gotta get in shape.

    Like

  51. CYN in Fl says:

    One thing I’ve always wanted to do and haven’t is become a Weight Watchers leader. Lame? I’ve done the program many times over the past 15 years, always lose the weight (because it works) and then think to myself “Self, I can maintain on my own” and save the $40/month. Well, CLEARLY that isn’t true.
    Last year, before I got knocked up, I lost 33lbs to get to a healthy BMI. I’m so glad I did because this pregnancy was so much easier. Now, post preggo, I’m only up 15 pounds from my lowest. I’m going back in 2 weeks to lose that (plus another 15 that I wanted to lose to begin with) and I WILL get to Lifetime and I WILL become a leader.
    I dont’ really care about the money I could earn (although it’s a nice perk) I just love teaching and helping others (I teach struggling readers, grades 6/7) and I LOVE helping people lose weight.
    Here goes nothing!

    Like

  52. Cheech says:

    College for me. Went 3 1/2 years, was offered a job playing the piano for shows in a local theatre, realized the money I could rake in by playing, and left college. Why my parents didn’t make me stay and finish up when I had a 1/2 year left, I’ll never know!
    Funny story about me and ballet. I took it for a few years when I was maybe 6-10. I am very tall (6 foot) and at that age was head and shoulders taller than the rest of my class. The instructor, seeing that I was turning into a beast and 6 foot ballerina wasn’t going to happen, asked my Mom to take me out of lessons. Niiiice! Now, it is funny. Especially when I look at pictures from the class and I look like an adult, compared to the other kids my age. But I’m sure my Mom wasn’t too thrilled at hearing her baby was a freak who was going to be expelled from ballet class!

    Like

  53. No idea if this is me or not, but why oh why can’t I comment since you changed your header?

    Like

  54. Jeanie says:

    why or why can’t I post a comment since you changed your header?

    Like

  55. June Gardens says:

    I'd rather tar a roof than run again. I have a phobia now that I had my injury.

    Like

  56. Jill Munroe says:

    Aren’t your feet all fucked up anyway? At least you’ve got that going for you.
    Running. I was in great shape & actually got to the point where I enjoyed running. Now I can’t think of anything I would hate more than going for a jog. Maybe tarring a roof.

    Like

  57. Geeky Girl with Glasses says:

    When I was 15, I took a few hours of flying lessons, but then I got my driver’s license a few months later and suddenly flying didn’t seem as great (especially when I learned I had to take a classroom course in order to get my pilot’s license – it was the most boring, tortuous class ever).
    Also, guitar. I took a few lessons then quit because the instructor wanted to teach me melodies, but I wanted to learn chords. I was too much of a wuss to speak up and tell him what I wanted so I quit instead.

    Like

  58. Anita says:

    What’s the saying? Jack of all trades, master of none? Something like that. Well, that’s me. I am Jack.
    I would say college. The whole thing scared me at the time so I just didn’t go. My parents didn’t push me about it either. I wish they had. I think I miss the whole thought of the college experience more so than the degree. I mean, I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.

    Like

  59. Mary Lou says:

    I played clarinet in grade 8 Band. Gave it up for Typing the next year. Typing.
    Of COURSE I missed the band trip that year. OF COURSE I missed out on wearing the red Sgt. Pepper uniform.
    Tried to catch up the next year but didn’t make the performance band so gave up for good.
    Still wish I’d stuck with it.
    Unscented Lady SpeedStick. Also unscented dryer sheets. Hate that scented crap.

    Like

  60. Beverly says:

    Gymnastics. I started when I was 6 and quit when I was 13. And no, there’s not a snowball’s chance in hell that I can do a split now that I’m almost 46.

    Like

  61. Roxie's Mom, Regrets, I've had a few . . . says:

    Horseback riding. When I was a kid I wanted every animal under the sun. Still remember entering a contest in the Sunday paper to win a palomino pony. Who would have been quite content on our 1/1000th acre suburban lot. Didn’t win. But took one riding lesson when I was 11 or so and the Mean Girls who were giving the lessons were snotty and condescending and convinced me this was something I could-not-do should-not-do never-would-be-good-at and that was my one and only lesson.
    But now, Lo These Many Years Later, I am surrounded by horses who come running when they see me.
    So, Joon, it’s never too late. It’s just later than you think.

    Like

  62. Jan says:

    I played saxophone for several years. But so did my (10 years) older sister. Every time my little 7th grade self would practice, my mom would comment about how much better my sister was at playing saxophone. Of course she was. She was majoring in music at college and was TEN YEARS OLDER THAN ME. My mom also insisted my sister be my private lesson instructor (because she couldn’t charge us). Those were awful. Because she was my sister, she felt it was acceptable to yell at me, hit me, and generally harass me during lessons. I decided one day I was never going to be as good as my sister, I was tired of dealing with her at lessons and so I told my mom I was quitting band. She never questioned me as to why and just let me quit.

    Like

  63. Danna says:

    Roller Derby! I was actually very good at it which is shocking. I don’t like sports or sweating. The thing about roller derby is that you can’t halfway do it. You either throw yourself all in and let the derby monster eat your life or you just well, suck and half ass it which isn’t fair to your teammates.
    I threw myself in. Unfortunately, I had a little piece of me thrown in here(full time college student) and a little piece of me there(uhhhhhh……hell, I am a mom and wife so there’s that cooking, cleaning, family time crap) and I was just stretched too thin. Something had to go. I used to spent 5,000 hours of my time at practice and bouts each week so, go it did.
    I tell myself that I can do it again when my boys are older but really, who wants to see an old woman on the track using a cane while wearing skates.

    Like

  64. I’ve been taking yoga (on and off) since 1996; but way back in the beginning somewhere, I missed the class where they teach you how to do that Namaste thing with the hands and the head bow properly, and now (after, oh, 18 YEARS) I feel too stupid to ask someone for instructions.

    Like

  65. Carol in SC says:

    Guitar. My dad plays guitar and I was learning as a teen. Then I discovered boys and partying. Now I wish I had stuck with it. It’s not too late, right?

    Like

  66. Hulk says:

    Music-I was in Honors band in hs and had a professor in college tell me that I should major in music.
    Or that girl I dated that wanted sex All.The.Time.
    Couple bad calls there…

    Like

  67. PJ totally gets Amish's anguish says:

    Who am I adoring this morning besides June? Is it Amish? It sure it!

    Like

  68. PJ doesn't have an answer but since when has that stopped me? says:

    Never had lessons but wanted them desperately, especially tap.
    Watching my husband at his retirement dinner celebrating a sterling and completed career I felt jealous. I’d had 3 careers, each cut short. My life was like a starfish’s life–arms torn off, new ones grown.
    My life would be a book of short stories, sort of related. One heart warming, two tragedies, one story of courage, one of heartbreak. I love my current story.

    Like

  69. Lenette says:

    College.

    Like

  70. Amish Annie says:

    You know who is gorgeous? Andre 3000. He was married to Erykah Badu. One of my favorite Outkast songs is Miss Jackson, some think referencing Andre’s relationship with Erykah’s mother.

    Like

  71. Jeanie says:

    Where are my comments going? Since you changed your heading, I’ve not been able to comment. I’ve tried Google and even joined Typepad.

    Like

  72. Jeanie says:

    Also piano. No offense, Joon, but I can’t picture you taking ballet.

    Like

  73. Amish Annie says:

    I have written before how I get overwhelmed with simple mascara colors (and I rarely wear makeup!!) and how I ended up with maroon and teal mascara after two hours of looking, all because I couldn’t decide between BLACK or BROWN. Now imagine me in the stupid, freaking deodorant aisle. I sometimes think I have a real mental health issue when I run out of deodorant and know I need to pick some up. It’s a huge mind game, that aisle is. The lotion aisle is just as stressful, I’m completely serious. Don’t even get me started on fabric softener sheets. Do you know I have to smell every.single.box every time and angst over if I’m picking the right effing smell? Do you? Do you? That aisle will be the death of me.
    I gave up a friend in high school and wish I hadn’t. After reading the above paragraph, I think she’s probably pretty lucky.

    Like

  74. Jeanie says:

    Also piano. No offense, Joon, but I can’t picture you taking ballet.

    Like

  75. peggy in mn says:

    Piano and mandolin lessons. I had taken piano for 12 years, and mandolin for about 4, and I was pretty good at both. My mom let me quit both without even asking why.

    Like

  76. BamaCarol says:

    Piano and swimming. I was good at both and stopped both. I do swim several times a week now for exercise though but I would love to get a piano and take that back up. Maybe after retirement…

    Like

  77. Letha's deodorant flavor is eau de puppoop says:

    You would totally have been Keith Jarrett.

    Like

  78. Cyndib says:

    Piano. I really wish I could play better!

    Like

  79. June Gardens says:

    YES! PIANO! I also dropped out of that and now I would be, um, some famous piano player. What's sad is I can't think of one remotely at all.

    Like

  80. June Gardens says:

    I mean, why do we want to go around smelling like a cherry? Also, the only time I got up at 5, ever, in high school was to watch Princess Diana get married. I would not have been a swimmer. I dated some swimmers, though. They have the good bodies. Oh my god I have to get off these steroids.

    Like

  81. Amanda in Bouse says:

    Piano.

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  82. Megsie says:

    When I was in middle school, I tried out for a swim team. It was evaluated and you were placed on the Gold, Silver, or Bronze team. The instructor told us (my friend and I) that since we were just beginning to swim competitively to expect to get on the Bronze team. Both of us made the Gold team.
    My parents were like, “Yeah. That is just great. You know that you have to get up and go to swim practice at 5 AM every day, don’t you?” So neither of us did it. And, yes, I regret it to this very day. I was NEVER good at anything. This is something I could have been good at in High School. Oh, woe is me.
    Lovely post, June. What IS it with the deodorant flavors?

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