Oh, and be sure to give me advice. I love that.

You guys, I love that house. I LOVE THAT HOUSE.

IMG_0681Love.

In case you didn't tune in yesterday, and what's your phony excuse, Ned and I are looking for a place to live. We wanted something big so that his 14-year-old cat can have a few rooms to herself, and also so we don't get sick and tired of each other. Last weekend, we said, "Let's just drive around and see if there's anything" and boom. We see this. First place we see. And LOOK AT IT!

I didn't take picture inside because there was a property manager with us and I didn't want him to think I was berserk. I mean, I already went in there with the Peter Frampton hair. (It's been rainy. And humid.) But I stole some pictures off the website.

Screen Shot 2014-06-12 at 8.05.21 AM

Dudes, it has a fireplace, and a formal dining room, and a sunny little breakfast place behind the kitchen, and a gazebo thing in the back yard, just like Shirley Maclaine had in Terms of Endearment when Jack Nicholson said, "I don't wanna blow smoke up your ass" and she said, "What a relief."

There are FOUR bedrooms, and they're all pretty big, although of course the closets are for Barbie. Jesus. So I'll wear two outfits and have one towel. That's fine. That's absolutely fine.

Oh, and built-in bookshelves! The place was built in 1913. Oh! And it's a block from a cemetery! I love cemeteries!

It's in the nicest neighborhood in Greensboro, and the houses around us are to die for.

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I am unsure if you can tell I've become emotionally attached to my new house. Ned, who also loves it, is being practical. "The rent is really high, June." Rent schment. So we're still mulling it over but if we DO decide to take it, we have to agnostic him down on the price if we can. Even if he DIDN'T come down, we'd both be paying less than we do. Plus also I have to get a renter in here, which everyone says will be no problem but what if it is?

Did I mention the pretty deck? And two bathrooms, thank god.

After we looked at the house, we walked the neighborhood and went to dinner at a restaurant in the neighborhood, a place we've always loved. Then we went back to my house and watched fireflies. Every sentence we uttered was, "If we take this place…"

If we take this place, we could baby gate the upstairs so that the dogs never, ever meet NedKitty. Screen Shot 2014-06-12 at 8.06.12 AM
If we take this place, Ned will have to join a gym because he works out at his apartment complex now. If we take this place, what if my alleged renters move out suddenly? If we take this place, can I put my cute Formica table in the breakfast area? If we take this place, how cute will my outside furniture be on that deck back there? (answer: Cute!!) If we take this place, I'll never be sad again.

IMG_0695 IMG_0698I'LL NEVER BE SAD AGAIN.

Impartially,

June

107 Comments

  1. Glad you got the rent down to affordable because I was tempted to put my house on the market and move down there for that adorable house.

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  2. Maybe we could pool funds for some sparkly mosquito netting for that there gazebo. And some citronella candles.

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  3. PJ just about sums up the sex in the south in the summer. You need lots of air conditioning and I haven’t seen an air conditioned gazebo yet.
    June, you do good work.

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  4. You can have sex in your gazebo in The South, AA. One of you will just have a lot of mosquito bites on his or her rump. Summer, South and sex? Only with good air conditioning or it’s, “Honey, move over. You’re making me hot.” And it won’t be the madly in love hot.

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  5. And I’m a little traumatized by what PJ said about the gazebo and how it won’t get used. Well, if you can’t have sex in a gazebo in the South, then why have them?

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  6. You make it sound so lovely, Carol in Mpls.
    I’m still stuck on morning sex in the sun.

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  7. I can see Adirondack chairs on the front porch and baskets of beautiful southern flowers I can’t grow up here. June and Ned’s furniture combines nicely, what with all those rooms to rumble around in. That sunny little breakfast nook is where Ned brings the freshly-made coffee to June in the morning. Books fill the shelves, and a fire burns brightly, with slumbering pets all around. Pretty nice setup!

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  8. When can we start giving advice? Oh, I have so many decorating ideas I can begin annoying you immediately!!
    Don’t know if you torah the jump or not yet, but if you yid, congratulations!

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  9. Two floors is good. Four bedrooms is good. Two baths is good. Porch is nice extra.
    Gazebo is meaningless because cold, rain, snow, humidity, spiders, pollen, pollen, pollen and mosquitoes. Ask people in NC how often they use their gazebos. One more thing to clean. I don’t have one. Almost all of my friends have one or similar. Never have sat in one yet.
    Good negotiating. You are good.

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  10. Sleeping Beauty is a wise woman. Capital gains only apply to profits, right?
    June, can you sell your home and avoid the hassle of being a landlord? Renters like things to be repaired immediately, whereas homeowners can live with broken stuff a long time. I hated being a landlord, but you might not.
    We move a lot through the military. I have seen so many rentals that I thought were “The One.” I fell in love, I pictured where I would put my things, and I envisioned which windows my cats would sun in. We didn’t end up renting most of them and things still worked out. There will always be another “One” and it might make more sense financially.

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  11. YAY!!!! Thank goodness, cause with only $1.38, I thought you might have to give up your DREAM of affordable, safe housing and start looking at homeless shelters instead.

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  12. This reminds me of a combo of the Goldylocks/Cinderella fairy Tales. ….since June is trying out new rental houses…while wearing glass slippers.

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  13. Paula just killed me D*E*A*D! That’s it! I’m coming Elizabeth!(said in my best Fred Sanford voice)
    June will be singing THe Hills Are ALIVEEE just like Madeline Kahn in Young Frankenstein sang Sweet Mystery of Life.

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  14. We have three bathrooms, also too.
    It’s the bomb.com.
    And I don’t even have to clean them. Perks of having children. Hashtag chores.

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  15. I have 4 bathrooms and live by myself (which I completely realize is SO ridiculous but I got my house for a steal during the housing market crash). I can pee from one side of my house to the other with the doors open and IT IS AWESOME! But then it really, really sucks when you have to clean 4 bathrooms and you live alone so you can’t ask someone else to help. And you live alone with a mortgage to pay so you can’t afford a house cleaner.

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  16. Sleeping Beauty, whether that’s advice or an anecdote, that stuff about capital gains is super useful and interesting to know. I’m just so sorry that the landlord didn’t tell you his/her plans. I hope somehow you manage to make something on the condo after all, now that the housing market is doing better. Good luck, and thank you for sharing your hard-won wisdom. Not advice. Just wisdom.

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  17. Sadie, not sure just yet. I may wait until the boy goes back to school. HH on the other hand will be there next month. Eek!
    Damn those agnostics! Sorry they won’t come down on the rent. Or am I being premature? I wasn’t sure how to read your comment. But remember, you have just started your search and there might be a house out there that you love even more.

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  18. Is there a basement? An attic? FOUR BEDROOMS? You two can have sex for WEEKS without every hitting the same room/place twice.
    What are the bathrooms like? Just curious. Is there a big soaker tub?
    Is there a good Chinese restaurant nearby?
    See. There’s the difference. You and Ned think of sensible financial things like, “how much do we feel comfortable spending? How much left over to live on every month?…”
    Me? I’m all, “How close to the nearest Target? Good chinese nearby? How far of a drive to my favorite Taco Bell?”

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  19. We moved from a house with one bathroom to a house with three bathrooms. Sometimes I pee in the other two bathrooms for no other reason except because I can. I am classy.

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  20. I love that place. Love it. I hope that landlord comes down on the rent or that Ned just cannot live without it, because that house is seriously charming.
    I think I mentioned that I love that house. My house was built in 1912, and old houses are wonderful.

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  21. Not advice, but a profound and truthful observation. The more bathrooms, the less chance of sadness.

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  22. What a great house! Just chiming in to say that you can “advice” and “what if” things to death. Don’t listen to us – listen to your heart. Sometimes, when it feels right, it does for a reason and you just have to jump in with faith that everything is going to be alright. Whatever decision you make, I hope it makes you as happy as you look in the pictures of the house.

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  23. The back yard looks fenced in for the doggies…bonus! Also, I really like the interior paint colors, very happy yet soothing.

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  24. That’s right, perfect your bench-jumping. That way you can avoid the snakes.

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  25. You and Ned can I Am Sixteen Going On Seventeen all over that gazebo. Wear your gossamer. And Ned can wear his Nazi uniform, he probably rarely gets a chance to.

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  26. You and Ned can I Am Sixteen Going On Seventeen all over that gazebo. Wear your gossamer. And Ned can wear his Nazi uniform, he probably rarely gets a chance to.

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  27. You and Ned can I Am Sixteen Going On Seventeen all over that gazebo. Wear your gossamer. And Ned can wear his Nazi uniform, he probably rarely gets a chance to.

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  28. Oh man when I lived in Greensboro I too was a block from the cemetery on the VERY edge of the nicest neighborhood in town… I went to the Greensboro Athletic Club. It wasn’t far away or anything. 🙂 If you love the house GO for it! What’s the worst thing that could happen? They say no to your agnostic price haggling? You kill me woman.

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  29. When Mr. Sadie and I got married, I decided to rent my house instead of selling it. Let’s just say I quickly learned that I was not cutout to be a landlord. And I had the same experience as BStar with the months with no rental income. Thankfully, it sold quickly once I put it on the market. Even better, it was long before the current underwater mess.
    June, this in no way is meant to be advice. Your post just brought back memories of the excitement of finding our home and the reality of being a landlord.
    Anita, when do you plan to move up here with the Atlanta peeps?

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  30. Let’s not forget that gazebo either. Maybe not early morning, but definitely late night. Or at least dark time.

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  31. That made me giggle.
    I was coming in to say I think a brand new, fancy, shiny Gay Porn Santa would be a FABULOUS addition to that porch.
    Not advice. Just a decorating desire.

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  32. Like I said yesterday, lovely house.
    What would be berserk about taking photos of a potential home? I think it is expected.
    While purging, I came across a calendar on which I kept progress notes during our home-buying process. I thought we went to see the house on January 2nd, but it was actually New Year’s Day. And I thought we waited a couple of days to make an offer. Turns out we did it the next day.
    When you know, you know. GOOD LUCK!

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  33. And also, they won’t do a rent-to-own thing. For tax reasons they need to sell the house within a few years of moving out. June, I know you don’t want advice, but just read me out: The capital-gains tax means that one has to have lived in one’s house at least 3 of the last 5 years in order to not be subject to being taxed on the sale of your home, once you sell it. So that means you either need to sell your house within a few years of moving out if you want to keep all the money you make on it, or keep it for the long haul. That applies to you and to your potential landlords. Again, just sayin’. Wish I had fully understood that before I moved out of my condo to rent this house. Now when I sell it (which I’ll need to do in order to buy any house at this point), I’ll be taxed on the earnings I make from the sale, which might mean I make essentially nothing on the condo. 😦

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  34. Unfortunately no, as they’ll be asking $775,000 for a 3-bedroom house in need of work. The location is great, which is why they can get away with that price (a smaller house down the block from us just sold for $700K), but it’s way more than we can afford. 😦

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  35. Ditto from my comment yesterday about the house, but I’ll say it again, LOVE, love, love the house! Lurker #8 had a good idea, but Sleeping Beauty has a great suggestion (it’s not advice). Just love it! The link from yesterday had great photos, and all those built-in bookcases, on my goodness, I can see your books stored by color right now.
    Is Ned as excited as you about the house? I hope things work out for y’all.

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  36. I love the house and I can totally see a porch swing on the front porch draped with a cute throw and some pillows so you and Nedly can cuddle. In the fall there will pumpkins and cute little Halloween decorations then Christmas…oh wait you are moving in there, not me. Dang. Okay I’ll wait for the pictures and live vicariously through you.
    Take the house and it will all work out.

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  37. One question to ask is, how long can you stay there? We’re in that boat right now – our landlords want to sell the house now and will be kicking us out after 2.5 years there, and it breaks my heart. We’ve fallen in love with the house, our neighbors, and everything about where we live – and no replacement houses to rent in our ‘hood are making themselves apparent as viable options for renting. Living in an apartment building mostly guarantees something like that won’t happen to you, but renting a house offers no guarantee past your current lease. Find out how long they’re likely going to be renting out their house before you get all attached.

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  38. That house. So cute. Take it. Pleeeese! If you don’t, I’m moving to Greensboro so I can have it!!

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  39. That house. So cute. Take it. Pleeeese! If you don’t, I’m moving to Greensboro so I can have it!!

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  40. Love how happy you are in those pics. Lovely house, and I hope it happens.

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  41. Agnostic him down on the price!! I’ll be giggling over that all day.
    And taking photos while house hunting is not freaky. I do that all the time. Especially if it’s something I either love or hate about a place. So, I’ll remember.
    I’d kill for that front porch. Is there a garage or a shed? For lawn tools and such. I’ve never been able to actually park a car in our garage because of the amount of outdoorsy crap we have.

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  42. That house is so perfect for you. When I started looking for houses last year, the one I ended up buying was the one I fell in love with first time I saw pictures. I was not ready yet and it waited for me for months. I walked in and knew it was going to be mine.
    When it is meant to work out, it will. I am sure you can find renters for you house, it is so charming and cute.
    You look so very happy in the pictures, I love how Ned just kept taking pictures as you were walking towards him.

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  43. I love that you mentioned the gazebo from Terms of Endearment. Every time some guy dumps me I think of that scene and want to do the ‘blah blah blah’ thing.
    That is really a great house.

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  44. If you get that house you could creep out the upstairs windows and sit on the roof and stargaze and talk like you are in a teen movie!

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  45. I would always be happy living in that house too! I totally see how you would never be sad again living in that house WITH NED!

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  46. Beautiful house! And the decks and porch will be fun. You will find you spend more time at home when you are together and in a place you love. Keeping fingers and toes crossed for you.

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  47. I want that house! This is not advice, this is an anecdote. When I lived in Seattle, I found a house I loved, but could not afford the rent. I offered to sign a two year lease, with lower rent and the landlord agreed. The number I offered happened to be the average rent he figured he’d get when the house sat empty waiting for new tenants each year, if that makes sense. Oh, I loved that house. It had so much charm, the neighborhood was perfect. Why did we ever leave ?
    Excited for you that you may get to live in that house with your sweetheart.

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  48. Typepad ate my comment because it had a teensy bit of advice in it. Way back when Mr. BStar and I decided to shack up, we had to rent both of our houses due to the sucky real estate market. I had to go a couple of months with no tenant a couple of times, but you learn to manage. You really do.
    I say you get a good or bad vibe from a home and you obviously got a good vibe. Good luck with making the right decision for you – I hope it works out the way you want it to. I love that neighborhood.

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  49. Really nice hostas.
    Love that excited, squee feeling, but it’s hard to think of anything else! Hope you get the house soon.

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  50. I say you get a vibe about a home and you obviously have one about this place. I wish you the best with making the right decision for you and Ned.
    when Mr. BStar and I started shacking up, we had to rent both of our houses due to the sucky seller’s market. Mine has been vacant off and on, but only for a month or two each time. You learn how to deal with that. You will. We found that we spent less money as a couple because we absolutely loved hanging out at home rather than going out. Plus, we are pretty far out of “the city.” I love the neighborhood this house is in and it looks fabulous from the pics. Good luck, June.

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  51. OHMYGOD! If you take this place you can sit on your front porch, drink sweat tea, and have Ned play you some songs on his guitar. What? That’s what Andy and Helen used to do. LOVE the house!

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