Not a fan of the blow dryer. Sent from my iPhone
Remember two years ago, when Tallulah had that bump on her side that turned out to be cancer? It's back. We go to the vet Tuesday to get it looked at.
Dudes. I have forgotten to buy hair gel for THREE DAYS IN A ROW. Am officially doing a tree impression. Jesus. What is WRONG with me? I mean, here is how yesterday went, and the two previous days were just as chaotic-y. I had this special project I got volunteered for, which is great and … Continue reading Strawberries and Hog
I was driving home from Ned's when I saw one of those horrid stick-figure families on the back of a car. I cannot tell you how I abhor those narcissistic things, says the woman who blogs about herself every day. This particular stick figure family was a woman with "I'm a teacher!" written under it … Continue reading I’m a narcissist!
When I was at my mother's house a few weeks ago, I found this picture of my Aunt Kathy (left) and mom in polka dots, back in 1975. It was my Uncle Jim's wedding. Look how hot they are! I remember they'd show this to people and ask, "Which of us is prettier?" which made … Continue reading A thousand words.
Woke up in the middle of the night with a stomach thing. Seeing as I just got back from vacation a week ago, I'm dragging self into work to spread disease to others. Go, me! Actually, I assume it's something I ate. Says Typhoid June. Talk amongst yourselves. Go read yesterday's post, if you haven't. … Continue reading Typhoid June
Several important things must be noted before I talk about our house: 1. My goddamn Delete key is not working on this keyboard, so I must forge ahead, typos and all today, and fuck it. I understand that having my wireless keyboard refuse to delete things on my stupid blog is not what you'd call … Continue reading Champing at the but
The one we've been obsessing over for weeks. WE GOT IT! WEEEEE GOTTT ITTTTTTT!!!!! ...Yay!
Ned and I went to an open house today of a house we've been obsessing over for weeks. The guy finally had a time people could come look, and the open house was till 3:00. The guy said if anyone is interested to call when the open house was over, and we called RIGHT AT … Continue reading June Lassos the Moon. Maybe.
I overslept, and I have these bags under my eyes that I have NEVER ONCE EVER woken up to. Aging is fantastic. My point is, I need advice. I know. Didn't I say NEVER AGAIN last time? There's always someone who's just been champing at the bit to tell me how fat I am or … Continue reading Fashion advice
Sent from my iPhone
Do you realize that Lily was gone exactly twice as long as my longest-disappearing-but-came-back cat, Confetti, who left for 26 days in 1987? Lily was gone for 52 days. FIFTY-TWO DAYS. The vet said she had one live flea on her, so dousing her with meds the second she got indoors was one of my … Continue reading Blog, she wrote
Obviouslee, Lilee beautiful. Lilee always been beautifull. Cannot help. And mom such good cook. Ebery day she make brown kibul to put in Lilee dish, and it devine. And maybe Lilee get...too fluffee. Sometime Lilee remind self of Elizabeth Taylor. In Liz flufflier yeers. So Lilee sine up for a, you know, health camp. Where … Continue reading “Fat farm” such a uglee phrase. (A guest post by Lily Gardens.)
I just left for work, and LILY CAME OUT OF THE BUSHES!!!!!! She weighs nothing. Will take picture as soon as I can.
You know, before I got back from vacation (a reader asked me to never say "vacay," so I will not), I made a vow I was not going to fill up my week with something to do every damn night, and yet it's happened again. Yesterday Ned and I spent our lunch hour looking at … Continue reading As I was saying, before we were so rudely interrupted by work and life…
I was tempted to title this "I need a vaCAtion from my vaCAtion!" but I was afraid there'd be that one person out there who didn't know how I abhor that sentence, and they'd be all, "Wow, June is such an asshole." Anyway, I'm back, and it's Sunday evening, and the pets and I are … Continue reading “Oh good. Someone else’s vacation pictures.”
We just went to one of those highfalutin rest stops, where I bought a high fiber bar and some cubes of cheese. Now my insides will be all dueling banjos.
Ned chews his ice. The entire thing. Also, before he commences to the chewing, it's necessary to rattle the cup of ice. We've been in the car together for approximately 25 hours so far this week. Sent from my iPhone
Sent from my iPhone
We have left the countryside. Back to my bustling home town. Ned has gained 7 pounds. I eat this much every day, so.