I overslept, and I have these bags under my eyes that I have NEVER ONCE EVER woken up to. Aging is fantastic.

My point is, I need advice. I know. Didn't I say NEVER AGAIN last time? There's always someone who's just been champing at the bit to tell me how fat I am or whatever. Still. Advice.

If you could put me in something flattering, what would you put me in? If I could score a burka, I would, but I only have the weekend to decide.

Color, style? Jeans, skirt, dress? What?

Okay, tell me. It's nothing fancy, so… (Steal something casual.) (That's only funny if you know from the movie Arthur.)

And I'll tell you WHY I need something flattering as soon as I am able.

Fashionably, June

P.S. Thanks for chiming in yesterday to say how long you've been reading. It was sort of fascinating, mostly because we were talking about me. My favorite part was how many people said, "You yelled at me, once, June, but I stayed around." Nice. I am a gem.

172 thoughts on “Fashion advice

  1. June Gardens says:

    Anita Morehead!
    Sent from my iPhone

    Like

  2. MrsHLBjr says:

    Hi Anita! Here’s one for you…I was on a ski trip vacation in college once & we were hanging out in the bar with a sing-along band & they pulled me & on of the guys in our group up on stage & dubbed us Anita & Craven Moorhead. My husband, who was on that trip too (but we weren’t dating yet), gets a kick out of calling me Anita Moorhead. He thinks he’s funny, but of course now we have 5 kids and who do you think wants to know who Anita Moorehead is???? Jerk.

    Like

  3. MrsHLBjr says:

    Hi Megsie!
    And I meant “few” not “fee” up there. GAWD.

    Like

  4. Deb who is back to being Deb says:

    Every time I eat something today I am going to think of you and your missing band-aid and throw up a little in my mouth.

    Like

  5. Anita says:

    That ding dong story is ringing a bell.
    Bahahaha. Who loves herself?

    Like

  6. Deb who is back to being Deb says:

    Remember those flat dolls that used to come with paper clothes that had tabs on them so when you dressed the dolls you had to fold the tabs over the dolls to keep the clothes on? The tabs lasted exactly .00325 seconds after the first outfit. Annoying.
    Good luck shopping today June. And as long as you wear your glasses, you will always look smart and literary no matter what you decide to wear.

    Like

  7. Megsie says:

    Oh, my gosh!! I remember your ding-dong story! It was awesome…

    Like

  8. MrsHLBjr says:

    I have no fashion advice except what my mom always says, “Black and white, always right”. And then something for a splash of color…a wrap or shrug, a big Carrie Bradshaw flower or brooch, sassy heels.
    But this is not why I logged on here to comment. No, I gathered you here to tell you what I missed telling you on yesterday’s post: I’ve been a reader for about 6 or so years. I found you through The Nester. I once left a comment about my confusion over ding dongs. So however long ago that was and then some.
    I’m sorry I’ve been a slacker commenter the last fee years, though. I have no excuse. Well, I have 5 kids so that’s my excuse, but really, no excuse.

    Like

  9. Karen in VB says:

    I love to shop and I love to dress other people. So, clearly we need to meet at Kit’s shop today and get this done. Even though I’m in VA. And, have no idea who Kit is or where I would find her shop. We still need to do this. I know, you can have Kit take pictures of your choices and we can all help that way! I liked Kit’s suggestion from early on in the comments. And agree with wearing something in blue to bring out your eyes. I’m a very conservative, cover up the boobs I don’t even have, person. So, I would go with a conservative V neck or slight scoop neck. I also think that look is a bit more professional and will keep the attention on what you’re saying not your wonderful assets. Good luck!

    Like

  10. PJ says:

    This isn’t for the ice bucket challenge is it? Had to ask.

    Like

  11. Amy (who's back now) says:

    Wouldn’t the linen get crumpledy? When I wear linen I look like one of the kids was trying to turn me into a paper fan…

    Like

  12. kit from the vintage shop says:

    just saw this…I was returning from Richmond today….btw…have you been to Richmond? Fun road trip.
    Come by the shop Saturday if you can!

    Like

  13. You don’t want advice from me, because apparently I dress like a lesbian. And I don’t use makeup either.

    Like

  14. You don’t want advice from me, because apparently I dress like a lesbian. And I don’t use makeup either.

    Like

  15. You don’t want advice from me, because apparently I dress like a lesbian. And I don’t use makeup either.

    Like

  16. Angie says:

    Damn! The ONE DAY I miss reading (because my freaking kid had stupid surgery) you ask a question I could answer….I don’t remember how long I’ve been reading but I remember the first post I read. It was the first time you went to drag queen bingo. I loves the story and pictures so much I spent the next few days reading all the archives (including comments) from the first day of Bye Bye Buy up to the present.
    I hope you didn’t think the question I could answer was fashion related. Remember I was still wearing French too nails until you told me to stop about a year ago. And you’ll be glad to know that I wear really excellent crazy nail polish choices now.

    Like

  17. Tee says:

    Deb, I agree 100 percent with you, nothing in the pockets if you are dressed up, but I don’t dress up to grocery shop. Heeee. I look like a lumpy bag of potatoes when I’m running around, but who care?
    In the south? There is so such thing as a light sweater in August.

    Like

  18. Amish Annie says:

    Holy Mother of God!!! It took me forrrrrrr-ever to get through the comments. And I have nothing to add unfortunately, as my style is simple, simple, basic, basic. Although my stash of vintage rings and bracelets is quite awesome and all I have to do is put on a vintage cuff or bracelet or a hand or two of rings that coordinate well and bingo, there’s some sizzle.

    Like

  19. Deb who is back to being Deb says:

    I am sure she did stun! But I would imagine she didn’t have anything sharp (like keys) or bulky (like a phone) in the pockets at all. That seems to me to distort the nice look. I have several dresses that have pockets and I really like them, but they do draw attention – especially when they stick out on the hips – dangerous territory for a girl like me who has a little extra cushion around her middle.

    Like

  20. Becky says:

    Deb, I would agree with you if you were wearing skinny jeans or a pencil skirt or something. But with a gathered skirt, circular skirt, loose dress… I don’t believe it’s that noticeable. And… pockets are the bomb. It’s great having a place to put your hands when you’re feeling a bit uncomfortable, or you need a place to put your keys or a hankie. My daughter just got married in a gorgeous gown with a gathered skirt and pockets! The pockets sold her on the dress, and she looked stunning.

    Like

  21. Lisa. Not THAT Lisa says:

    Garanimals! Exactly! It all goes together, no thinking in the early morning dark of my closet.

    Like

  22. Carol in Mpls says:

    Well, not really sure what’s up with the P.P. reference, but it seems that my suggestions seem to jive with others today. Clearly a v-neck, as it’s flattering. Blue would be excellent, and a lightweight summer sweater as well, especially since you’ll be indoors. I wear black and white year round. It’s the adult version of Garanimals for me.
    We’re having that nasty 70% humidity for a few days. Don’t mind the hot, but despise the humid. Snow is no big deal any more.

    Like

  23. Deb who is back to being Deb says:

    Tee, if you are dressing to impress it is really impossible to have anything in a pocket. You need a smooth, clean line. Whatever you put in a pocket (including hands which I know, is very comfortable), makes you lumpy. For a regular run to the store it is fine to fill them up. LOVE my pockets. But to look sharp? Nothing must be in the clothes. Except skin and underwear. And later, maybe Ned’s hand.

    Like

  24. Tee says:

    SS, the link wouldn’t open for me, probably because I’m so technically challenged.
    Paula, NO purse is sooooo much better. I’m into just carrying my phone, keys and wallet in my pockets.

    Like

  25. Cosmo's Dad says:

    I was going back to that, why is it that cartoon characters wear shirts and no pants? And what is it with the three fingers?

    Like

  26. Just Paula H&B. says:

    Thanks PSS!!

    Like

  27. Just Paula H&B. says:

    Thanks PSS!!

    Like

  28. Just Paula H&B. says:

    Thanks PSS!!

    Like

  29. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    From Paula Just Paula H&B, for you to check out, June:
    https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10204627922647919&id=1530587307

    Like

  30. Just Paula H&B. says:

    I have an outfit mood board thing but I don’t know how to attach it here. It’s on my desktop. I can post it on Pie on the Face. It is southern, it will bring out your eyes, the bag is cute, it is YOU. I could never wear it and I wouldn’t touch the watch with a stick, but you’ll see it on FB.

    Like

  31. Just Paula H&B. says:

    I have an outfit mood board thing but I don’t know how to attach it here. It’s on my desktop. I can post it on Pie on the Face. It is southern, it will bring out your eyes, the bag is cute, it is YOU. I could never wear it and I wouldn’t touch the watch with a stick, but you’ll see it on FB.

    Like

  32. Just Paula H&B. says:

    I have an outfit mood board thing but I don’t know how to attach it here. It’s on my desktop. I can post it on Pie on the Face. It is southern, it will bring out your eyes, the bag is cute, it is YOU. I could never wear it and I wouldn’t touch the watch with a stick, but you’ll see it on FB.

    Like

  33. Just Paula H&B. says:

    Tee is my people! She recognizes the importance of a good bag. NO bag is better than a bad bag.

    Like

  34. Just Paula H&B. says:

    Tee is my people! She recognizes the importance of a good bag. NO bag is better than a bad bag.

    Like

  35. Just Paula H&B. says:

    Tee is my people! She recognizes the importance of a good bag. NO bag is better than a bad bag.

    Like

  36. Anita says:

    I love that dress, Sully!! I also love her legs.

    Like

  37. Sadie says:

    Cute dress. Wish I’d look like that if I wore it. Sadly, I wouldn’t.

    Like

  38. Tee says:

    Just a small hand-held purse to hold your car keys, DL and lipstick, not a bag, especially with shoulder strap. If Ned goes with you he can drive and there will no no need for a purse/pocketbook.

    Like

  39. BStar says:

    Wow, Deb Who Is…., I like your stylist eye. I love this combo. And, it looks kind of artsy. The tailored pants and that serious, slightly sexy blouse would look fabulous with June’s curls.
    Maybe she’s at Kit’s right now finding a vintage ensemble.

    Like

  40. Deb who is back to being Deb says:

    No pockets on your hips, no low cut cleavage-dripping tops, no baggy tops, no saggy bra.
    A lifting, good bra and tailored clothes will take you from your usual hot to el fuego!! You have great legs and boobs. Treat them with the respect they deserve, no matter what the color outfit. I would stay away from beiges and browns as they can wash out a person with your skin and hair color.

    Like

  41. Sully says:

    I think something like this in BLUE would look great on you!
    http://www.feedfloyd.com/mirror/fashion/a-dress-f9C5.html

    Like

  42. Sully - definitely not a fashionista says:

    Blue is definitely the color for you, June! A nice bright blue. Teal would also look great on you!

    Like

  43. Linda in CO says:

    This is one of the reasons I love June’s blog, for the fashion advice. I had no idea. I wear Birkenstocks. And mumus (moomoos?).
    June, I think you’ll look lovely in whatever you wear.

    Like

  44. Becky says:

    Since your budget is about like mine, and you want to be comfy as well as somewhat stylish, I vote for this dress that’s on sale at Target this week, which you can dress up or down. Pockets!
    http://www.target.com/p/merona-women-s-ponte-elbow-sleeve-dress-w-pockets-assorted-colors/-/A-14955672

    Like

  45. Fawn Amber says:

    Is this for a book jacket by chance? Because you should just wear the Naked Dress. OBVIOUSLY.

    Like

  46. Sadie says:

    As long as it’s not a plunging neckline so as not to negate the smart, literary look she’s going for. And also too, June might care if they hear a word she says.
    But what do I know? I’m still thinking about Oreos and MoonPies.

    Like

  47. Nelson's Mama says:

    Just saw this on Anthro’s site (my weakness)… After all the color suggestions today, thought it might be a good choice. 🙂
    http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/product/clothes-dresses/4130212061738.jsp?color=008#/

    Like

  48. Melanie in Northside says:

    Tunic dress with short boots.

    Like

  49. Aunt Kathy says:

    Each time I read a comment, I agree with the one I just read. I liked the all white one, but then thought a linen shift would be nice. You’d look great in turquoise. Also, too, a V-neck with a nice necklace would show off your womanly attributes.

    Like

  50. Tee says:

    Inside means A/C. Yes, match your eyes. You look thin to me, you certainly aren’t fat! Remember photos always make you look heavier. At least, that’s what I think, I can’t be THAT fat.

    Like

  51. Blues, turquoises, periwinkle would be good bets. They will bring out your eyes and make your skin and hair look great.

    Like

  52. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    Match your eye color. Can’t go wrong.

    Like

  53. Pamela Soul Sister says:

    June is 5’6″?! Hooo knew?

    Like

  54. June Gardens says:

    So, Lisa and your pie, if you're good with colors, what color should I lean toward? A very pretty woman at work said I should aim for blue.

    Like

  55. I am no help with fashion. I am good with colors, but you have already been advised well on that count.
    I would shrivel up and die if I could only wear black and white. My closet is color arranged, like a rainbow and I counted 20 pink shirts the other day. 20, just in the pinks.
    And I always assumed when people called you tiny or teensy they meant your weight, not height.

    Like

  56. June Gardens says:

    Tee said thin!
    It's indoors, at a coffee shop.

    Like

  57. Tee says:

    Moon Pie! I’m holding my sides.
    Is this an inside or outside event? Do you need to look artsy, book wormy, businessy? I’m not saying you are wormy. Outside? Oh my goodness, in this heat? If so, take a folding fan, it makes me want to faint just thinking about the heat.
    I always thought you were tall and thin. I’m only 5’1″ so I think everyone is tall.
    Amber, this really is a great group.

    Like

  58. June Gardens says:

    Yes. That's what I was kind of thinking. A-line. Because hello, front butt.

    Like

  59. Mel says:

    An A-line skirt is universally flattering.

    Like

  60. June Gardens says:

    See, now I want to yell at you just to be awful. Don't fear the blogger, Amber! And don't fear Hulk, either. He is a total bitch.

    Like

  61. Mrs. Gumby says:

    I have no fashion sense, so I can’t help June. However for “Amy the Chafed One”, I suggest a product called Body Glide. It’s wonderful and really helps prevent uncomfortable chafing.

    Like

  62. Amber says:

    Hulk was mad because I repeated something he had already said, but I didn’t have time to read the previous 200 comments before I posted. It’s all good, June you have a gift for writing and you brighten my day with much needed laughs. I just avoid commenting now, in fact I’ve already said too much!

    Like

  63. DW's Mom with understanding sez - says:

    Use an attractive straight hemmed floral or patterned blouse as a “jacket” if you need one.
    By the way, what are we dressing you for??

    Like

  64. Deb who is back to being Deb says:

    I love those dresses, too. But I am afraid they will age June. There are certain patterns and styles that you can look very cool in when you are in your 20’s and early 30’s. When you wear them in your later 40’s on you tend to look like a meemaw. The middle one is nice – that may work since it accentuates the smallness of the waist.

    Like

  65. Jeanie says:

    June, you NEED that pie dress, whether you wear it to the big event or not!

    Like

  66. Deb who is back to being Deb says:

    These:
    http://www.dsw.com/shoe/joe%27s+lauren+pump?prodId=dsw12prod5710004&activeCats=cat10006,dsw12cat880002
    With black, pencil leg tailored pants, and this but NOT SLOUCHY like she is wearing it
    http://bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=51166&vid=1&pid=970545012
    With several strands of fake pearls and a red purse.
    No boobs if you want them to focus on your brain.

    Like

  67. Lisa. Not THAT Lisa says:

    I would not even attempt a contribution to fashion advice. I am Paula – black on black (which sounds rather exciting when you say it that way) but I’m sure she is a stylish black wearer whereas I am a frump. I choose black to go with all the other black I already own. Also too it shows off that I am a proud dog owner! Bonus!
    Can’t wait to hear where we are going though!

    Like

  68. PJ says:

    I posted early then was off to Loaves & Fishes and thought about this while I was here. Should have asked if there would be cameras and then, no yellow, no white. Light blue photographs well.
    TV camera? No dots, no stripes.

    Like

  69. PJ says:

    June has shown me her fist twice, Mother got mad at me out once but Siren leaped to my defense, Hulk got on me (heee) for being too negative once, and somebody once said I needed to get a life (little did she know that I lead two). But so what? I think June was feeling the love, Mother was exactly making my point (that social workers are far too overworked, underpaid, and get cranky when forced to listen who-the-hell-is-that-person taking up our time with in-service, which I was agreeing to, having to be the horrible in-service person which is a job made in hell)
    Oh but the friends I have made and met and some still to meet in the next year. As we’ve said here many times, Amber, come for the laughter, stay for the abuse.

    Like

  70. Cheech says:

    You look tiny and short to me. Of course, I’m almost 6′, so…..perspective.

    Like

  71. Tee says:

    Okay, I’ve skipped most of the comments, but if this is going to be an outside event and it being the south, has anyone suggested an aqua color linen skirt and matching blouse/top with nice accessories. Aqua looks good on every one/everyone and linen is such a southern summer fabric. It will complement your Michigan accent.

    Like

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: