Freaky Friday: Look what June remembered to do!

I have gotten a few Freaky Friday submissions since Peter's chilling tale. Here's one from Jeanne. __________________________________________________________________________ My mother used to tell a story about me: When I about four, I found my mother weeping and asked her why. She told me it was my late grandmother’s birthday and that she missed her mother. I … Continue reading Freaky Friday: Look what June remembered to do!

Livin’ downtown. Driving all the old men crazy. Sadly, I’m probably too old to drive old men crazy.

Well, I'm ALMOST packed. I know it's taking forever, but I'm going through a whole house and shed and attic and Marvin's stuff and besides, I usually get bored after an hour. There's no light in the living room anymore, hence the dark depressing Sylvia Plath look of my now-empty bookshelves. Shelves are staying here. … Continue reading Livin’ downtown. Driving all the old men crazy. Sadly, I’m probably too old to drive old men crazy.

Let me stand next to your fire

Ned is sick. If you're Catholic, you might want to go light a candle or something. He emailed me midmorning yesterday. "I am home from work. I have aches, chills, I feel awful." I asked if he needed anything. "Yes. A chicken sandwich from the Iron Hen, and some sauteed okra. I.am.starving." I got him … Continue reading Let me stand next to your fire

Now there’s me there is no weakness

It's Sunday night and it's raining, which I knew would happen anyway because my hair predicted it. I inevitably get a small but unmistakable curl right in the middle of my forehead--yes, when she was bad she was horrid--before it rains. It is a reliable barometer. Anyway, this is the second-to-last weekend that I will … Continue reading Now there’s me there is no weakness

My hands are small I know. Oh, shut up.

I just heard that stupid Jewel song, from the '90s, where she wishes she could tell the whole world, "We're all okay." She also wishes to tell the world not to worry, because worrying's wasteful and something not good something. Is there anything more annoying than some 21-year-old twit thinking she can tell the rest … Continue reading My hands are small I know. Oh, shut up.

In which I am so unfunny that I make a Willem Dafoe joke. You are going to Willem Defriend me.

I want you to know that as I type this to you, I am also touching up my white roots. June Gardens, multitasker. June Gardens, white-haired old geez. I guess "old geez" is redundant. You'll have to accommodate me. I'm ancient. I'm like that great aunt who says incredibly racist things that you have to … Continue reading In which I am so unfunny that I make a Willem Dafoe joke. You are going to Willem Defriend me.