June’s outta touch, she’s outta time

Aw, heck. I showered, fed everyone with fur, sat down here to not blog and noticed I had a call from a 1-800 number. Remember last month when some ass stole my identity, because everyone’s dying to be me? I have an automatic withdrawal from my gym, and let’s all giggle for a moment about “my gym.” Wow, June, you and that gym. It’s like you’re one.

What the hell was I thinking, joining that gym?

Anyway, when they STOLE my identity, my bank stopped my debit card from working, so this month’s automatic withdrawal didn’t work for my gym, so they called at EIGHT OH NINE to talk to me, which is super polite.

The point is, I called them and talked to them and now it’s 8:26 and I have to go to work, which means I can’t really talk to you.

So, you talk to me. Earlier this week on Pie on the Face, our page on Facebook, someone wrote in needing advice. Does anyone else need advice? Someone can write in with their woes and we’ll answer.

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Talk to cheery June. Or her people.

Yesterday I had to go downtown, and that is not a euphemism, to “ideate” for work, and what I’d like to “ideate” about is why we have to make up words. Anyway, after, I headed to my friend Kit’s store. It’s always fun to look around there. Kit is fixing me up, as she knows everyone in town. Further reports as developments warrant.

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You know, you can buy some of her stuff on her website. See the link above. I didn’t know you could do that, and now everyone who knows me is gonna get Kit shit. And there’s her new slogan. Buy Kit Shit.

All right, I have to get dressed. Once you stop feeling atwitter about my berobed current situation, feel free to type us your woes in the comments.

54 thoughts on “June’s outta touch, she’s outta time

  1. I have a woe! Please send help!

    I’ve been dating a guy for a couple of months. He’s nice and all, but I’m not feeling it. I’m not nearly as excited about him as he is about me, and I need to break things off. My trouble is, he’s going to be hurt. I don’t like hurting people. How can I get the guts to do this? I know this is dumb, and men have never had any trouble dumping me, but I feel bad.

    Thank you.

    Whimpy

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    1. Think of how much more you will hurt him the longer you go on with him thinking things are great. It will suck but the sooner the better. You got this!

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    2. You can do the “it’s not you, it’s me scenario” if you want to help spare his feelings a little. Sounds like that’s not far from the truth, since you are just not into him.

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    3. Oh, Whimpy, you are my people! I wish I had advice for this, but sadly, I suffer from the same affliction. Let’s hope someone here can give us some advice!

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    4. Oh shit! Same here. We dated a couple times a few years ago and started up again. It got a little more serious this time and it was horrible. Now I’m stuck trying to weasel my way out of it. He’s a really good friend and I know that we won’t be friends anymore once I break the news about being just friends. I feel like I owe him a real talk and not ghost.

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  2. Have been wanting to ask for advice but not wanted a liver smack, so glad today is Ask For Advice Day.

    We got a dog, Finn, a Great Pyrenees about two months ago. He is lovely and wonderful and generally worth all the damn hair and my son and husband LUFFS him. (As do I) As a Pyr, he is a highly independent thinker; they were bred for eons to be this way. In general, they are not motivated to please their people; they are motivated to do their job, which is protect their flock. I have two probs:
    1. Finn doesn’t see the two cats as part of his flock. He wants to chase and possibly eat them. Dodohead ignores the shit out of other dogs, squirrels and chipmunks, but goes on point and into stalk mode for rabbits and cats. It’s not an “I want to play” thing, either.
    2. He climbs the chain link fence, even if you are out there with him. And then doesn’t come back. At all. So we can’t have him off the leash, ever. Which makes me sad because how happy can he really be with that??

    Exacerbating circumstances: We don’t know his back story, but from his behavior, I surmise that he was chained outside. He has zero training, although we are working on that (he does sit for treats and generally has beautiful leash manners). So I can’t do something logical like put him in a “down” position and keep him there and introduce the cats. Besides, trying to keep him in “down” means literally holding him down. Dominance and pack hierarchy doesn’t work with Pyrs, generally. I want to get a trainer to help us, but they are … not inexpensive.

    Sooooooooo … any ideas?

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    1. Hi! I follow a wonderful lady on facebook that runs a Pyr sanctuary (Palmetto Pyr Haven): https://www.facebook.com/PyrMom Her name is Toni L. Hammond. She could probably give you some good training advice. I have a Plott hound who hunts our cat. It’s been a problem for the six months we have had her. So I understand your pain. We keep them completely separated for now.

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      1. That’s what we have to do, too. And I hate it for the cats, who just want to be able to go on the porch or sit on a couch in peace, but they now won’t come out of the bedrooms. It was their home first, you know? But I don’t think we can – or should – return Finn to the rescue group. I feel like we should work to figure this out, but I don’t want them to live in fear of the giant doofus.

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    2. How old is he? A lot of dogs calm down after the age of two. Hope that eases your mind. If not, sorry, that’s all I got.

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    3. Look up coyote rollers for the top of the fence. Basically pvc pipe mounted on cables around the top of the fence. Won’t let the dog get a grip on the top edge of the fence (assuming he’s not just plain jumping the fence). Thought we were going to have to do that for our dog but she could be supervised and got a little less bouncy. Others mentioned running a “hot” electric wire around the top of the fence but I worried about the learning curve for the humans in the household.

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      1. I have seen those and contemplated them. Probably be the most effective solution (unless he decides he can jump and clear everything). I wonder how expensive that would be – our backyard is approx. a half-acre. I think when they measured it for fencing it was close to 500 linear feet but I could be way off.

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        1. Does invisible fencing not work because they can’t feel a warning (all that fur) or because they just run right through? Some people suggested running an invisible fence a foot or so inside the physical fence so the combo would keep the dog contained. I didn’t want to do that either, partly because our fenced area is pretty small.

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          1. Partly because of the fur, partly because they are so darn independent, if they perceive something is a threat (or just super enticing), they’ll endure the shock to get at it – but generally NOT endure the shock to come back. :/

            One guy shared how his Pyr went after another dog with a broken pelvis. They will, if fully bonded, sacrifice themselves for their herd.

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    4. OK so here is my advice on the Pyrenese for whatever it is worth (probably about half a penny). My dad had a Great Pyrenese, dad’s yard had a 10 foot privacy fence and it was a large double lot back yard. His lovely dog had a mind of his own and would routinely step over the 10 foot privacy fence and go for long walks all by himself. The vet told my parents the poor dog was bred to think independently and is bored, he recommended long term daily mental stimulation. After some intense loud arguments that may or may not have resulted in grape juice being thrown at the kitchen wall, my dad won the discussion and the next day he went to a local farm and purchased three pygmy or miniature goats. Took them home (or maybe had them delivered, my dad is city folk) built a small circular fence area on one side of the yard and a similar fenced area on the opposite side of the yard with a good distance between the fenced areas. Believe it or not, the great Pyrenese never wandered again, never stuck a toe over the fence. He very happily herded his goats all day and the goats kept the back yard grass neat and trimmed. Essentially my dad purchased pet goats for his pet dog.

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  3. Oh, also: invisible fencing doesn’t work with Pyrs, nor do shock collars (which I hate, anyway). We can’t afford to rip out the barely-a-year-old chain link fence and put in 6- or 7-foot privacy fencing, either.

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  4. I was completely befuddled at “berobed.” In my head I was pronouncing it bee-row-bed. I had never heard of a beerowbed and wondered just what kind of bed it is.

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    1. Oh thank you Jeanie! I called it bee-row-bed in my head too! And after the recent not-blog about getting a guest bed with a mattress, I thought perhaps there was a new kind of mattress called a Bero Bed!

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  5. LaUral, have you considered the topping on the chain link fence, I don’t have a clue what the correct term for the stuff is, but it is like at an angle and has three strands of barbed wire? Then Mr. Pooch could be outside, unleashed. I’ll try to find a link with a photo, no pun intended.

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  6. LaUral, this is what I was trying to describer, barbed wire outriggers or arms. Maybe not a good idea with small children. It does look a bit…prison-ish.

    http://www.ecvv.com/product/4661457.html

    I hope you can find a good solution to keeping you pooch contained and not on a leash all the time.
    I can’t stand to see a poor dog chained!

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    1. Actually, my mother suggested rolls of razor wire. Jokingly, of course…

      I’m giggling trying to imagine what the neighbors would say on NextDoor!!

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  7. Kitten or Cat. Soon to be ex is bogarting the cats so I am living cat free right now. Plan to get a cat at the end of the summer. Usually I would get a kitten but the last cat we adopted was ~5 years old and one of the best cat’s I have ever had. So do you think kitten or cat?

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    1. Two kittens or one cat. The best cat we ever had showed up on our doorstep. He, obviously, wasn’t a stray and I never could find his owner. Don’t know if he was dumped or left behind after a move, but he was the best for the sixteen years he lived with us before he died. The vet said he was at least two or three years old when we found him.

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    2. they say 2 cats are better than one so they have company. that being said, you can often find adoptable cat pairs at rescues that are already bonded. otherwise the general rule is that both cats be less than a year old and they will likely bond. whatever you decide, even if it’s just one cat, a rescue should be able to match you up with a great cat. good luck!!

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    3. The last batch of cats we’ve had since being married (our second batch) we’got two sets of brother/sister
      kittens. I highly recommend getting two from the same litter. They are no more work than one. Ours are inseparable. Plus, we have one formerly feral baby born in our backyard. All four get along great (one of the sisters died a few months ago). That’s my two cents.

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  8. i have been under ‘contract’ work since moving to texas. i’ve been here for 4 months now of a 6 month contract. the learning curve is/was pretty challenging. anyway. i did not complete my first contract here in texas because it was coming to close with no sign of an extension. i got an offer and took it. i’m starting to get requests for my resume. (yes, i always have to tell the story). if i get an offer for another (contract?) job before this contract is over — that will be my second time not completing a full contract. i feel like i don’t owe anything while i’m a contractor. but i think recruiters would frown on two incomplete contracts. all other factors being equal – would you take the new job offer?

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    1. Hi Dancer,
      I am not giving advice, just asking a question. Can you ask the new job offer people to delay your start so you can finish your contract AND get the new job? Win/win is what I am going for here…

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    2. I have been waiting to talk with my husband about this to get his opinion. In software engineering they hire a lot of contractors — I wanted his take. Unfortunately he isn’t sure either. He wondered if the contract was to finish a task or just for a time slot? Is it really leaving the company in the lurch? It is hard to balance what is best for you against what is best for the company sometimes –because you wonder if it will come back to bite you later, but overall we always think your first loyalty should be to yourself because nobody else is going to put you first in the workplace. I would be pretty sure the offer is for something you are sure is worth the risk. Check out the offering company and their environment etc. But takeaway message? Yeah we don’t know 🙂 haha

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  9. I have no advice to ask for, but I did want to say that I enjoyed the photos…and I am so happy to be able to come her in the morning without being all swamped and stuff.

    Lovely post, lovely June!

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  10. Eyes are still smarting after seeing the mother pig with the goony smile in Kit’s store. Is that a stomach bulge above her smiling piglet, or does she have human breasts? Also, my brother had a smaller version of the white-haired troll, called Guggly or Googly, only his had red eyes. I need to visit this store.

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    1. Now I want to hunt to see if I still have my troll from my teenage years. Mine did not have white hair. In fact, this may be the first time I’ve seen a white-haired troll.

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    2. My brother had a white-haired Googly, too, with red eyes. One eye would pop out and brother would follow other dolls with it. Clearly demon-possessed. Googly, I mean, not brother. I think.

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    1. My thought as well.
      Like daily miles walks. If not a walk you on a bike and him on a leash so he can run.
      They have a strong instinct, that is why they are used as guarding herd dogs. Whatever is on the other side of the fence seems a threat to his herd to him and he needs to keep it away from his herd.
      We have a working dog line German Shepherd and she has been challenging to raise, but has settled a bit recently. Her demeanor was better with daily LONG walks. She could and probably would walk forever. When you head back for home, she gets in front of you to steer you away from home.
      She turned three earlier this year and has started staying on the deck by us when we sit out, before she would be out running and herding birds . Yes, she herds cardinals from tree to tree and through bushes. I think they are playing with her because there is one path through our forsythia bushes she always takes when chasing them and we have acres. She will even follow them from tree to tree and bark at them, not repetitive barking, but one bark. She loves playing with sticks, like it is her job. She has to have a job to do to feel helpful. She will grab the bottom lip on a five gallon bucket to help us carry it down to the garden to pick produce.
      She is a thinking dog and it is challenging to keep up with all she thinks.

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      1. He does get walked at least four times a day, but with husband and eldest child at home for hte summer, they should be able to increase the distance – at least in the morning and evening.

        I once said I like my dogs like my men: big and submissive. And then I got a smart dog…

        Liked by 1 person

  11. I know someone who once lived in a one-room apartment in NYC. The toilet was next to the stove. She called that area of the room her Shit-Kit. She should have out some Kit Shit in it.

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