June the Excellent Pet Parent

This weekend I have tons of activities planned.

Great.

Is there anything more annoying than a weekend of things to do? I just got done entertaining someone. I wanted a weekend to myself. With nary a plan. But no.

IMG_8788.jpgLast night I got home a little late, as I worked a little late, and walked in and said, Man it’s quiet in here. What is it, exactly?

…And right then I knew. There was no dog in the house. I’d taken him to dog daycare, and forgotten about him.

And by the way, you guys, turns out I will, in fact, be able to livestream my Dog Mother of the Year Award ceremony, so.

IMG_8799.jpgMy lack of jawline and I screamed back downtown and into dog daycare at the 11th hour, and you know how it is when it’s 11th o’clock. The other bad dog parents were all there too. One woman was getting her big white fluffy kittenheaded Great Pyrenees, and there was great obsessing in the land, and I wanted to kiss his whole head repeatedly, which would have looked super sane. Some other dude was getting his small shaggy white dog and I was all, whatever.

Finally my neither white nor fluffy nor big nor small dog came out. The thing about Edsel is, when I leave, he’s got his front paws on the window from the playroom, watching me go, with his hanky crumpled in his paw. When I return, he’s up in that window, knowing, somehow, that I’m back. The whole time Tallulah went there, and she went as a puppy, she never even acted like she knew me. She’d run to the guy and never look back.

Anyway, pleased to see me, he was. So then I felt even guiltier and that is why last night Edsel got a Pup Cup from the fast food place.

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oooo we getteeng pup kup edz no it he do
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thank mom for pu–lahlahlahlahlahlahlah

So that’s today’s parenting tip. When you screw up? Fast food.

I also finished a big old freelance project last night, and turned it in, and they told me another one is on its way forthwith. So that’s good. [Insert “If you can’t drive with a broken back at least you can polish the fenders” joke here.]

So, that sums things up: social plans (sigh), work done and more coming (yay), dog is currently digesting ice cream, and just one more thing:

It’s 7:52 and Steely Dan hasn’t come home. I wish he wouldn’t do this. Sure, there are nights he refuses to come in, nights I know he’s with other women. But in the morning, he usually runs in. Oh, he’s never, ever at the door. Why would you do that if there’s a whole world to explore?

But usually, if I call him, I hear a rustle and he bursts over from Peg’s, or he leaps off the roof. Today? Nothing. I don’t like this. Hang on. Ima go to the front door and call.

…Nothing. Goddammit.

I know this will cue the “I NEVER let me cat out” people. But go ahead. Try to keep this cat inside your walls. He figured it out before he was three months old.

Sigh. Further reports as developments warrant.

P.S. I was just about to hit Publish when I heard a meow.

That asshole. Scaring me half to death.

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hoooo care
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yuuu skare us veree badlee, steel dan.

25 thoughts on “June the Excellent Pet Parent

  1. Parenting tips by Jooooon!
    WP liked me today. I can post.
    I hope the socializing isn’t too miserable for you. You have my sympathy.
    I’m popping the corn for the steaming of your awards show.
    You’re so pretty!

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  2. I’ve walked miles, many miles round and round my yard looking for my two cats, fmr. Calling and calling and calling only to have them step our of the bushes with a look of… What? I would almost be in tears, then I wanted to kill them. So glad SD is found.

    We are having a party Saturday night and we have been working like crazy in the yard since we are having it outside the hottest day of the year. Tents are up and some of the tables are in place and I are exhausted. Enjoy your weekend.

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  3. We have an obligatory visit to a couple who bought their retirement house and want to show us all they’ve done to it TWO HOURS away. She called me this week to discuss our visit and kept saying how we could stay the night, the mealS she had planned, etc. Uhhhh, no, arrive early enough so the guys can ride bicycles together, ONE MEAL, visit and we are outta there by 5pm to drive the TWO HOURS home. She isn’t my friend, but our husbands are really good friends. She is very opinionated, always right about everything, etc. I will be glad when it is over. At least my husband knows I am taking one for the team.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Kris, you are a very good wife to take one for the team. I SO understand! Often are the times that I have endured a most unsufferable wench in the name of my husband being able to spend time with his best guy friend. He and his wife live in a different state, so visits for us are NOT short. The friend is a doctor. She, as a doctor’s wife considers this her proudest accomplishment, having married a doctor. He spends on her lavishly, which good for her. But what happens is that while the boys are off having fun, I get to sit and listen to her go on ad nauseam about everything he’s bought her and exactly how much every one those things cost. She is “fragile”, and won’t go outside for any longer than to walk from house to car. So, I end up having to spend the entire visit babysitting her. I’ve tried to suggest that he and his friend just go have boys weekends, but she won’t allow THAT. Ugh. Exhausting is what it is!

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  4. It was a happy Edsel day! Friends to sniff, ice cream, and he gets to tell the Needy Committee all about his day.
    That damn Steely Dan is a panther and needs to roam. I have 3 cats who still go outside during the day. The other 2 are too old and decrepit, like NedKitty.
    I am going to a funeral, well, more of a memorial service, as the departed won’t be there. So, your weekend will still be more fun than mine. See y’all when I get home!

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  5. First of all, I love Edsel’s face in the backseat. Also, Great Pyrenees *do* have the kitten head thing going on! Never thought about that! Heavens, did SD find some catnip? Crazy face on that boy!

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  6. Oh, I love the picture of you and happy Edsel. You look great and, of course, I love pictures of cute, gay dogs. Also, moment of panic over SD. Glad he showed up or I would have fretted all day!

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  7. My husband forgets to pick me up from work ALL THE TIME and I never get a Pup Cup. Next time mister!

    Lovely post June! Steely Dan knows who butters his bread. What. A. Cat.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Please don’t tell SadieDog about a Pup Cup or she’ll start expecting it. She’s happy to get a dog biscuit from the bank teller at the drive-thru window and, yes, she expects one on each visit.

    Glad SD returned home before you had to leave for work. I had flashbacks to times I would look for my cat and imagine terrible things. Then the squirrels would start with their, “Danger, danger!” chatter and there would be my cat returning home perfectly fine.

    .

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  9. We had a cat like that – you really cannot keep them inside. And I am team inside cat. That damn cat took more lives off from ME than my own child. She’d party all night long and come home to eat and sleep. I spent most of my life trying to keep that cat awake during the day so as to detour her from partying again that night. But, you know how teenagers are…

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  10. My anxiety was welling up and then I got to the sentence about him meowing and the sigh of relief was HUGE. SD cannot be contained, but I agree that he doesn’t have to worry you/us.
    I’m too involved, I know. Last night I tried to tell my husband about the horrors of colonoscopy prep, and he’s about to have his first, and I said “you know, June went through the prep and now I’m never having one. You know who that is, right?” He gives me a wincey ‘why does she do this’ and says “the one with the dog you still cry about?” YES! Good job with the June-Talu association there!

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  11. Look, I forgot to pick my actual children (4 and 6 years old) from daycare yesterday. I pick them up every weekday and have to drive past daycare to get home. Luckily I realized just as I was pulling into the driveway, but I didn’t give them a treat when I finally got them. You’re nicer than I am.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I strongly believe in the parenting tip about screwing up = fast food treat.
    Oh, wait. Did you mean for THEM?

    I have been playing that “hide the treat” game with my dog, and we both enjoy it ridiculously much. So thank you for that.

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  13. Everyone is already in bed, I am sure, but I am just joining you today. I think a good pup cup can take care of a multitude of errors. Ice cream cures all.

    Lovely post, lovely June!

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