I’m just driving back from spending an afternoon with my Aunt Mary. In real life, my aunt lives in Colorado. But she just happens to be in Michigan visiting her husband’s family, so we met in the middle and had lunch today.
When I was a kid, my father would go on business trips to Hawaii, and also to a town in the middle of Michigan called Owosso. This led me to tell people that when I grew up, I was going to move to either Hawaii or Owosso. I did not understand why grownups thought this was so fucking funny.
So I schlepped out there today, through the country roads, and the country houses, and the Country Time Lemonade, listening to new country music, which ought to be banned. Goddamnit, new country is horrific music.
June. Driving all of her new country music fans away since 2017. All two of them.
As soon as I got out of my car, the first person I saw was my Aunt Mary. I have no idea how she happened to be standing right there, but there she was.
We went to a very cute place for lunch, and who knew Owosso had gotten all charming? No wonder it was my dream destination when I was a kid.
Also, she gave me a whole bunch of her rings. My Aunt Mary has what you might call a few rings. She enjoys her a ring. That ring in the picture above is my great grandmother’s engagement ring. I guess my Aunt Mary and I are engaged now. At least I’m getting married again.
We went to all the cute downtown shops that are mostly really old stores that they have refurbished.
Could I? Could I please drink vodka out of an emoji? I can’t think of anything I’d like better.
“When we are done with this afternoon, we are going to end up saying the best store was this liquor store,” I said. I was not wrong.
We went to chocolate shops, shoe stores, a wonderful bakery where we each bought some sort of foreign baked good that I would marry. And we also returned to the general store that time forgot, a store we went to two years ago When we were similarly in the same state at the same time. I don’t think anyone has updated it since 1962. Photos below…
How YOU doin’?
“I think we are at the very bottom edge of the age allowed in here,” I told Mary. “I think you have to be at least 50 to come into this store.”
I love that place. It is a total grandma store.
Finally, we found a diner where we could have coffee with our foreign baked treats.
They were baked treats by Foreigner. Susie went and left us for some foreign guy. They were foreign objects. I’ll stop.
After, it was getting late and we both had to go back to our respective temporary homes. I was driving back through the country, looking at acres of country, thinking about a country crock, when I saw an A&W.
Careful readers will note that I had lunch, a baked good, and signs point to probably something from the chocolate shop, leading careful readers to note there was really no absolute medical necessity for me to stop at A&W. Careful readers should go fuck themselves.
Ima head home now, where I hope my mother has made something for dinner.