Because I don’t have enough going on, today I’m starting the keto diet.
You know it’s a good sign when you don’t get to the grocery store to BUY your keto food till 9 p.m. Which is what I did yesterday. Look, I have a lot of kittening and catting and dog-walking to do after work.
I guess now is a good time to throw in the obligatory kitten pictures. Yesterday afternoon, when I got home from work, which haven’t I said that like 14 times now? Okay, June, we understand you came home from work.
So I got home from work, heh, and when I opened the kitten-room door, all seven kittens were using the three litter boxes. They were having a little litter box party. As you do. Tonight we’re gonna potty like it’s 1999.
They’re so much more adept at the box than those last four kittens, and for that? I am grateful.
What cat fur on my black pants? Say, June, here’s an idea… How ’bout you ixnay the black ants-pay?
I had trouble getting a photo of her actually sitting still. I’ve already washed that blanket once, I shook it out 394934043 times, and I’m washing it right now as we speak.
While I was sitting here selecting from the 294839403 kitten photos I took yesterday, I also made my keto coffee, which consists of regularly scheduled coffee (use a french press! they say. fuck off! I say.) with some coconut oil blended in it. It’s kind of delicious but makes my throat hurt. Why does it make my throat hurt?
…I just Google fuckinged it, and it happens to other people, too, though no one can say why. Thanks, world. Helpful.
Hah! I forgot I had this one. Runty is very screechy, and I love her so bad.
That delightfully clean blanket just stopped washing, so I’d better get it in the dryer so they can have it back and soil it as soon as possible, and then I’d better get to work. Then you know what I’ll do?
I’ll come home from work.
I know this was a short and shortie post, but I’m doing a lot. I’m doing it all. I’m every woman, it’s all in me.
And by all, I mean a fat layer.
Talk to you tomorrow, when I will give a full First Day of Keto Report, which I am certain places you at the edge of your seat.
I will leave you with this final, petty annoyance, which should really be the slogan of this non-blog. I was watching Parenthood the other night and got annoyed by how DAMN MANY producers there are on the show. The credits were distracting, there were so many.
Watch and grow annoyed with me, won’t you? Also, why do they think people talking at the same time is fun to sit through?
Goddammit…Autocorrect ruins my life.