As I mentioned earlier this week–and does this seem to be the most endless everlasting gobstopper week ever?–I’ve had somewhere extra that I’m scheduled to be all week.
On Saturday morning, I had a date. We hated each other.
On Sunday afternoon, another date. We, too, hated each other. For awhile I kept a list of every date I had but now it’s too much bother. I don’t know why I trouble myself and put mascara on on a weekend.
I know that doesn’t sound like a lot, but it involves doing my cleaning/painting/anything fun early so I can shower so I can then air-dry my hair FOR FOUR HOURS before said dates.
On Monday, I had a noon doctor’s appointment.
Tuesday after work I had the trainer.
Yesterday morning I had to go to the doctor early for labs. After work I had a hair appointment, which of course is a two- or three-hour event. Men never understand this.
I took a before picture, above, and then never took an after picture, and the fact that I’m this scattered is why I’m writing to you now. (I can’t take an after picture now because when you get your hair colored, you can’t get it wet for 36 hours afterward. So it’s sort of frizzy now cause I slept on it and she never cakes on the gel as I do. She sort of thinks of gel and waves it over my head. I have said gelless hair half up in a ponytail holder and I look like Gene Simmons with no makeup.)
(Remember when Kiss decided to take off their makeup and they looked like old Jewish men and when they performed they kept making those same I’m-a-cat faces but instead of looking mysterious they looked like old Jewish men making faces? That’s me today.)
Tonight I have my trainer again, and tomorrow right after work I know I have something but I can’t remember what and then — oh! Pedicures with The Poet. Then Saturday I have Edsel’s vet appointment and Monday the doctor again and when life is like that, this is what happens…
I walked in on this today. I apparently started emptying the dishwasher, god knows when, and never finished.
Also, necklaces. When I get busy like this, I tend to just take off that day’s necklace just anywhere and plop it down. God forbid I take it to the jewelry thing in this giant 999-square-foot house. So necklaces are on the coffee table, the bathroom sink, the desk here. It’s absurd.
I don’t mind having something to do maybe one or two days a week, but having to be somewhere day after day irks me. I don’t know how families with kids and schedules and full-time jobs even do it without being constantly cranky.
Oh, also? My toilet’s clogged, so at lunch today I have to run to Target or something and buy a plunger. I HAD a plunger and I think I threw it out when I moved. It didn’t bring me joy.
And yes, I tried the thing where you put vinegar and baking soda down there. And the warm water thing. I have one toilet. I was thirsty last night and didn’t drink any water so I wouldn’t pee.
So that’s what’s relaxing and new. It’s like a spa up in here. Somebody turn on that Native American flute music, cause man, is that soothing to me. If I’d been a Native American and heard that music I’d have been the crankiest squaw in the flute circle.
All right, my papooses, I’ll catch you tomorrow after my relaxing day.