One of my friends called me last night and said, “Oh, I’m glad I caught you at home.”
Also, my neighbor came over this morning to help me with my trash cans, and she asked, “So, what are your plans for today?”
It’s becoming a thing amongst some of my friends that they want to be the first to split me wide open with their funny funny humor. My friend from work, Austin, keeps trying to send me funny texts so that I blow open like the wafer-thin-mint guy.
But I already had hysterics when I spoke to Ned on the phone and he was complaining about his hair. (To a woman with no ovaries and a new scar who has to be housebound for six weeks.) Anyway, he said, “My hair just lies there, like Tony Randall.”
When I asked him why, he said it was because Tony Randall is dead. I realize that explanation doesn’t help us at all.
I do feel slightly less foggy as of yesterday afternoon. I’m not saying I’m not foggy, but I’m less foggy. I’m less Foghorn Leghorn and more Cloudhonk Shintoot.
I got a book from one of you that I really like and thank you. It is called Hazel Wood. You signed with the name you used to comment on my blog and I didn’t know your real last name to thank you.
It is occurring to me that I could’ve looked on my blog, found one of your comments, looked to see if you have an email address there and gotten a hold of you there. This lets me know that my brain is less foggy today and see above regarding Shintoot.
If I’m not mistaken, and I really could be, The Poet is going to come over today at lunchtime. Also Kit has offered to bring me lunch tomorrow. I have no appetite still, which I guess should be exciting, but I feel hungry and then nothing sounds good to me. Kit made me a chicken pie right at the beginning of my convalescence, and it was freaking delicious and it’s the only thing I was able to consume with any relish. Not literally. Anyway I’ve eaten it all. I think I’ll make her bring me a hamburger from one of the downtown restaurants tomorrow. I hope I can eat it.
Speaking of The Poet, I still have this ridiculous chat feature on my phone that we use at work. Mostly what the copy editors use it for is to ask, “Does anyone need any extra work? I have too much” or “Does anyone have any work to do? I have nothing to do.”
So I have seen those countless discussions while I try to get offa my cloud. The copy edit team is so nice to each other. Today I saw someone say, “Does anyone need any extra work? No pressure.” It’s just so polite. We’re like the Canada of the world of work teams.
I have to go. If Poet is really coming over I should shower and fix my Moses hair. My gray growout project is two inches in and these curls are very Red Sea parting. Perhaps this look is a mistake.
Once again, I hope any of this made sense because I feel like I’m making sense but then again I feel like I’m floating off on a cloud of waves. So what do I know?
UPDATE: I know comments are turned off and I’m trying, with my very clear head, to turn them on. With my smile.
UPDATE TO UPDATE: Comments fixed.
UPDATE TO UPDATE TO UPDATE: I got enough tips to pay for the stupid domain name so I took that part of my blog post down.
FINAL UPDATE: In the nine days since my surgery, I have been invited to four parties. All of which have occurred this past week or so. I couldn’t go to any of them but that’s more parties than I get invited to in a whole year usually. What is up with that?
I’m toying with the idea of growing out my gray, and right now I’m wondering if the silver color depositing conditioner from Overtone would be helpful. My daughter uses the purple, and it makes her hair silky and glossy and very very purple. But it does have protein, so I don’t know if that’s your hair’s thing or not.
These are the things i muse about, instead of curing cancer.
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I wish you a quick and comfortable healing. Rest and feel better soon.
I can wish you well today because today WordPress is allowing me to comment.
For me WordPress approval is as fickle the wind. Days go by and sometimes I can comment, sometimes can’t.
So, quickly, before the door closes, Get well! Get well! Get w
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I’ve not said this 488432368855 times or anything but you know you don’t have to leave an email to comment.
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It was me! Yay – I’m so glad you liked the Hazel Wood. I realized, as I was ordering it, that buying a book for someone is tough. You REALLY don’t know what they’re going to like, but you end up saying “here, I liked this. I can only hope you do, too.” So that worked out. Glad the fog is lifting and you’re getting back to your old self again! We’ve missed you!
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It’s like buying someone perfume. But I was hooked from sentence one!
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Cloudhonk Shintoot…flump. So glad the fog is going away. Ned! Your friends are really wonderful to bring you food and check on you. When I had surgery I wasn’t hungry, which is highly unusual. I especially didn’t want desserts which is my favorite food…eat dessert first so as not to fill up on good, healthy foods. It had to be the anesthesia.
Tee
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Want to hear about my TOOTH? No. No one wants to hear another syllable about that (*&^%$#$%^& tooth. I’d rather have another hysterectomy, but that’s sort of a one-time deal. Although I do still have my cervix and twins. I heard this on some stupid sitcom recently, when one sister was torturing another sister about her age and having a baby: “Oh yeah, your cervix. Isn’t that where they filmed The Golden Girls?” I personally CAN NOT wait to use that.
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Glad to see that you’re making some progress, and that your friends are bringing you care packages. That’s the kind of help that is truly appreciated. You’ll get there. My senior year of high school, had my gall bladder out at Thanksgiving and was back in the ballet studio by January. Is there a home pedicure service in town?
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Oh I wish there was. And a home Botox.
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Clearly a business opportunity waiting to be unleashed on the world. If groceries can be delivered, why not a mobile mani/pedi studio? I can completely visualize this, and am ready to be customer No. 1 from the git-go.
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Here in NB Canada I was sent home early from my part-time government job. It is snowing heavily with the storm billed as the worst storm of the winter – I hope that the weather forecasters are as wrong as they were with the last four worst storms of the winter as in not at all correct.
Finding that you have posted today has been another good thing. Thank you for thinking of us as you recover.
Laurie (Lucy’s mom)
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Awesome to have people helping you and cooking for you and sending you books and show suggestions. Love the parting the red sea remark. Keep feeling better!
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Yeah, people have been really nice. It’s cause I’m so nice.
Did you just see that lightning bolt?
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I had to google Tony Randall and still didn’t get it until you explained in your newly turned on comments.
Also? Cloudhonk Shintoot is my new favorite thing.
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I thought I was going to be the first to comment. Glad the comments are fixed to I can be the 28th. I’m glad the fog is lifting and your pain is decreasing. Have you seen your trainer yet? Oh, I kill me!
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31st to comment. Oy.
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…SO I can be the 28th. I give up.
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Yeah. We’ve done a ton of crunches.
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OUCH!
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So glad to hear that you are improving health-wise. Actually this is a good time to be working on operation gray/silver roots. Since you are sorta confined to your home, the roughest part of the rootage is happening while you are not attending all those parties. -let the healing continue-
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When I grew out my gray, I used a zigzag part. Also, once it all grew out it wasn’t nearly as gray as I expected it to be. I was a little disappointed! Anyway Miss Internet Guru, rest up, eat up, bottoms up.
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Man, I’m white white white. It’s amazing.
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Your hair is going to be stunning, I have spoken.
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Yep, I agree. White white white will look amazing
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Tony Randal was quite spry, he had a young wife if I recall correctly. My hair has been a bit flat lately too but I never equate it with the dead even though I am a death hag. I would have laughed at the he’s dead comment too. I wish I could be turned off by food. I was quite a bit after my gall bladder surgery but that is completely normal. I had previously had only one ovary and one tube removed and it had no effect on my appetite at all. Here’s to by no means the easiest weight loss. I lost about 25 with the gall bladder surgery but managed to find it again.
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When I was 23 I had a bone cyst removed from my left tibia. It required a bone graft from my left hip, which was more painful, after surgery, than the leg. Anyway, one day in the hospital, we had an Abbott and Costello movie on TV, with our three channel options at that time. My mother, who had never found Abbott and Costello to be at all amusing, found them to be hilarious that day. The more she laughed, the more I laughed. And hurt.
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I am happy that you are better each day. I hope the pain subsides and you are able to do more things and not hurt. You have a good friend group there–feeding you and throwing blu–so nice!
Lovely post, lovely June!
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Yeah, pain wise I’m really at a 3 or 4. I asked myself which I’d rather have, a fuzzy head or pain, and fuzzy head wins.
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I will never try to out-funny you.
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Noticeable improvement on the fog is a good thing! And the poet is visiting! I’d like a visit with the poet, personally.
Ned’s hair just lies there every day? Hunh. the one thing on him that can commit to something long-term.
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Harrrrr
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That’s a good one
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i had a hysterectomy last January and the things that used to sound good to me food wise don’t any longer. Still, a year later, I’ll think of a food or meal that used to excite me and it just doesn’t anymore. I used to to love mayo on everything. Now? Don’t care for it on much of anything. Could it be from the surgery?? I should google. Also, I was off for 6 weeks and thoroughly enjoyed myself. I normally stay up very late at night but when you know you have nothing to do the next day or nowhere to be it makes going to bed at a decent hour so much easier. I think I usually stay up late to prolong the day but those 6 weeks I would go to bed when I was tired and wake up when I felt like it. It was glorious.
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I’m so glad you are on the mend. And I look forward to whatever variation of fog you come up with tomorrow!
Also, please do yourself a favor and watch the Amazon Prime series Modern Love while you are convalescing.
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Seen it. Twice, even!! Loved.
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I’m glad it was a problem with the comments as I thought the problem was with me trying to post the first comment. Obviously, your fog is lifting if you were able to fix it. Yay for your computer skills.
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Cloudhonk Shintoot.
I hope you were clutching your stitchal area when you wrote that because I’d have busted one or ten.
Glad the fog is starting to lift.
It definitely hasn’t diminished your humour cells.
Keep on feeling better, Joob.
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“My hair just lies there, like Tony Randall.” NO you can’t just say that and not explain it. Why is it lying like Tony Randall? Did Tony Randall have a distinctive way he laid down? Or was that referring to Lying? I don’t remember that from the Odd Couple but Tony did have a long and illustrious career. So please explain. Enquiring minds want to know.
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I wrote this post on my phone and not all the paragraphs are posting. I’m irritated. He said Tony Randall because he’s dead. But why, out of everyone who’s dead on the earth, did he pick Tony Randall?
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I don’t know why he chose Tony Randall when Moses is much more dead than Tony.
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Good point. But Moses has puffy hair. At least to hear God describe it.
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Praise the Lord and Lift the Fog!
Now that you are ’round the bend, I am envious of your time on the couch. I don’t want your suffering – just the recuperation period.
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My neighbor, R, who was here today just said, “I need some of this” and gestured to my robe, book and couch. Not at THIS price, you don’t. I pulled a blind open and now my innards hurt.
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Thank you for fixing the comments! Unfortunately now I can’t remember what I was going to say. But I hope friends keep bringing you food and I’m happy you are feeling less foggy.
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Hahahahahaha. Oh, I would so do that.
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I read the title and thought your tongue was caught between your teeth.
The domain thing may be a scam if you don’t have a domain name.
Ms Guru.
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Did you take an extra snark pill today? It’s from WordPress, the domain name email is. So.
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Me? I am sorry if that sounded snarky. It wasn’t meant to be snarky. I just had a hard time saying Cloudhonk Shintoot . I got it I liked it. I called you ms guru because I thought it was superb that you fixed it.
Love ya!
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Yay for fixed comments and for Cloudhonk Shintoot! Glad the fog is starting to lift. Hope you’re able to find something delicious to eat; nothing worse than being hungry and nothing sounds good.
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Right? It’s so frustrating. I hope I’m getting wafer thin.
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“Tis only a tiny wafer!”
Glad you’re feeling a little better, June.
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I FIXED IT! Oh my god, am internet guru.
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I never doubted it.
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