June's stupid life

Ten (yes, I WILL run down the beach in my cornrows now)

by June

I have two things to tell you today: about the dog and about the thread. I guess it’s yarn, not thread. I have a yarn for you.

First of all, today is my 10-year anniversary with Edsel.

I’ll tell you the story, like most of you weren’t here when it happened. Like you don’t know this story and aren’t about to expire from boredom.

Ten years ago today, I was married. I lived in a different house and worked for a different place (an ad agency in Winston) and I didn’t even know Ned existed. It seems so weird. My life was completely different then. I had no Iris or Lily or the two recent add-on bonus cats. In the cat department I had Henry and Winston and Francis.

  • Henry, Winston, upbeat Francis.

I also had Tallulah. Alive Tallulah, fmr. Oh, how I loved my Lu.

Ten years ago, Tallulah was two years old and she was my first dog. I was super into having a dog and did everything Cesar said to do except be the pack leader. Talu was pack leader from day one.

I took her to dog daycare every day. When we got home after work, I drove her to this park, where we took a long, long walk that ended in the dog park. Sometimes I’d let her play there for two hours because I was friendly with all the other dog parkers and we’d chat while our dogs ran all over yonder.

Then Lu and I’d walk the long, long walk back to the car. We’d get home and get something to eat and I’d turn on the TV and Lu would stare at me and go, “Mmmmph.”

“Mrrrrrrf.”

“MMMMMmmmm.”

She was NOT DONE. She was bored.

Oh my god.

So I decided she needed a dog friend. Basically I got Edsel to entertain my other dog because I was too lazy to do it myself.

“We need a puppy,” I said to Marvin, spouse, fmr. These really have been a changey 10 years, man.

“No,” said Marvin, spouse, fmr.

Everything I ever wanted, Marvin’s first response was no. Do you have any idea how depressing that is, to live with the forever no like that? Trust me. It is.

“We should try this new mustard.”

“No.”

It was a reflex with him, I swear.

Anyway, sometimes I could get him to yes, and in this case I did after months of trying, by reaching a compromise: He could get an old car if I could get a new puppy.

So I started looking on Petfinder and he started looking on Carfinder. I don’t even know if that’s a site, but it probably is. I’d confer with him on which puppies looked appealing and I’d apply for the ones we agreed on. We had three or four applications in when I saw Montana. You’ve no idea how I wish I’d have screenshot the profile pic from Montana’s Petfinder ad.

Because Montana was goofy-looking. Montana, in his date-me profile pic, was slung over the shoulder of his foster mom, ears like — well, I can’t even compare it to anything. You know that image where Jesus is knocking on the high rise? That’s the only thing I can think of when I think of Edsel’s puppy ears.

He was ear-y, if you’re picking up what I’m throwing down.

On Saturday, October 2, 2010, Marvin and I were headed out to buy a new couch. I don’t remember what was wrong with our old—oh, yes, I do. We had had a cat, Ruby DeLuna, a fluffy black cat, who got depressed and peed all over our old couch, repeatedly. Poor Ruby.

Anyway, that’s why the new couch. But as we were headed there, I got an email saying I had been approved to adopt Montana and did I want him. Who wouldn’t want to adopt a whole state? “We got approved for a puppy!!!” I squealed to Marvin, who I think mostly didn’t want a puppy and ended up living with said puppy for less than a year before he left. I don’t think that’s why he left. He probably asked himself, “Do I want to be married? Answer: no.”

So anyway I got a new couch 10 years ago today, as well.

One idea that’s good is a new couch and a puppy all at once.

After our success at Rooms to Go, we made arrangements to meet the puppy that evening in Mt. Airy, where Montana resided. You know, if there’s any state this dog is not, it’s rugged, no nonsense Montana. He’s maybe Connecticut or some other effete state. He’s Florida. Long and full of goofiness.

We were headed out the door to drive to Mt. Airy when the phone rang. This is back when you had, you know, a phone at your house that actually rang with real callers.

“Yes, this is Whoo deee Blee Golden rescue. You’ve been approved for a Golden retriever puppy!”

I mean, my purse was in my hand. I was ready to go. “Oh, no, thank you,” I said to the Golden retriever lady, whom I now picture with very wavy ears. “I’m headed out the door right now to get an Edsel.”

I think about that sometimes. How would life be different if I’d said, “Screw Montana! Get me a Golden!” Would I have become basic? I mean, even more basic than someone who gets a couch from Rooms to Go?

Anyway I didn’t and this is the path I chose. The Edsel path.

We drove to Mt. Airy to a gas station and watched the sun set behind the mountain while the deliverers of Edsel/Montana were late. I think at the time I thought all pet exchanges on Petfinder were legit, but in retrospect the whole thing seems shady. Did I rescue Eds or buy him? I don’t know.

Anyway, show up they did, eventually. Eds was riding on the lap of an old lady, which was prescient. Marvin handed over the $90 “rehoming fee” and I thanked them. “Oh, no, thank you,” said the lady driving. “We weren’t sure anyone would take this homely puppy.”

(Here is what I wore 10 years ago today, and I always liked that outfit. Those pants were pink.)

He really was sort of goofy-looking. But that’s what drew me to him. I thought he was cute!

On the drive back, Eds snuggled into my hair. He’s always been quieter in the car. We’d been planning to name him Sputnik, which I still think is a good dog name, when I said to Marvin, “What do you think of Edsel? It’s the car nobody wanted.”

“Oh, that’s a good one,” Marvin said, and by the way we had a lot of struggle naming pets together, usually. Brace yourself, but usually every name I suggested he said no. He said no to naming Winston Chairman Mao. He said no to naming Tallulah Lulabelle.

In retrospect, he was right on both of those.

Anyway, we brought him home and Tallulah barked but after five minutes she settled into a quiet resentment of Eds that she carried with her to her dying day. She literally died to the sounds of Edsel barking.

The moment we brought Edsel home, Talu became dignified. The day before she’d been a puppy. On October 2, 2010, she became Talu, dignity dog.

God, how did I stand that yard all those years? As I write this, poor Victor my beleaguered lawn guy, is aerating my lawn.

Anyway, that is the story of how I got an Edsel 10 years ago today. And while a Golden retriever probably would have been lovely and perfect, would it have been as interesting as Edsel? Would it have loved me the way Edsel does?

Would a stupid perfect Golden retriever know half of what I’m saying to him? Would he be lying here staring at me as we speak, the way New Hampshire/Montana/Sputnik/Edsel is? Would he flap his tail against his bed every morning when I greet him from my own bed?

Probably. But he wouldn’t have been my Edsel. The Edsel we’ve all come to know and love.

Happy 10th anniversary, Edsel.

P.S. I guess I droned on about my big-eared dog (and didn’t even get to his underbite) and never mentioned the yarn, but that gives you something to look forward to. If you’re on (Face)Book of June I will talk about it there, how’s that?

71 thoughts on “Ten (yes, I WILL run down the beach in my cornrows now)”

  1. I’ve been reading you since 2008, so why in the world don’t I remember your getting Edsel?!? That’s just weird. Maybe I was on a June hiatus. Still, you’d think I would have noticed a new dog in the mix when I got back.

    Also, I had more kids to keep my other kids amused, so your reasoning does not seem weird to me, at all. And every time I brought a baby home, the baby (fmr) suddenly became NOT a baby, just like Lu.

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  5. Happy Anniversary Edsel & June! That first picture is my favorite, he’s so happy, just precious.

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  8. About 10 years ago I realized I my first reaction was always “no,” so I made a decision to default to “yes.” Not that I always do that, in reality, but it has brought more variety to my life.

    You’re so pretty in the pictures, June. Especially that last one with you, your hair, and Edsel.

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    1. I default to we’ll see, gives us both the time to think it over and gives us time to form pro and con lists.

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  9. Happy Anniversary, you two! Not many can say that after ten years the anniversary partner still idolizes you! Also, we named a dog Sputnik after the Russians got to space first. It was a little white thing that barked and scared Uncle Jim and me. We wouldn’t get off the couch. I think Granma took him “for a ride” after that first afternoon. AuntKathy

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  10. Happy, Happy Tenth Anniversary, Edsel and June! I loved the story and adorable photos. My dream experience for Edsel would be that FEDEX delivered a box with a feather like boa version of “Blu” and then he could play with it AND play dress up in an old Hollywood theme.

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  11. Happy gotcha Day to you two! Who would have known ten years ago how wonderful this trip would be. Congratulations on ten spectacular years!

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  12. 1) How is it you look 10 years younger than you did 10 years ago?
    d) That is one happy (ecstatic?) dog in that first picture up there.

    Lovely post, lovely June.

    CommandoBarbie

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  13. What would you have done without Edsel by your side these last 10 years? He’s been a loyal companion. So happy you found each other!

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  15. Thank you for giving us Edsel. Oh he was a cute puppy. Today’s post was so filled with sweet memories. Sweet Lu, Winston, hilarious Francis, Marvin’s perpetual “NO”….

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  16. The instant I saw you were going to talk about getting Edsel I remembered Marvin’s no. Edsel’s not an easy dog but he’s a mighty interesting dog.
    Please let us see you in cornrows and do not forget the beads.

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  18. Happy Anniversary to you and Edz! Aww… that story – well, it brings the tears to me. Makes me think about my girl Lollipup and then my boy Marley… happy, sad, happy…. It is ok – I love them and love your animals! Aren’t they the sweetest? And – I never hear “no” anymore… not for years and years! Living alone with animals has many rewards!

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  21. What a good boy! Happy birthday to Edsel! or anniversary or whatever we call this day. Many happy returns of the day!

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  22. He is just perfect and perfectly adorable. I love the Edsel stories, he’s brought a lot of joy to this world in ten years.

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  23. Edsel is adorable, loyal and so loving. There could never be another Eds. He is wonderfully unique. Happy ten year anniversary and gotcha day. PS Golden Retrivers are lovely but they are very prone to cancer. My best friend wanted one until she found out. She has two cute Golden little dogs, a Westipoo and a Chuweenie. She may one day get a Goldendoodle.

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  25. We really don’t deserve the love and adoration we receive from dogs. They are such wonderful creatures. Happy anniversary to you and Edsel.

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  27. Happy Anniversary, June and Eds!
    You’ve given each other so much love and happiness over the years. And we’ve been lucky to watch him grow, in all his goofy splendour.
    Thanks for sharing him with us, June.

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  31. Awww. Sweet story. And wow, life can change a lot in 10 years. It makes me think back 10 years ago and I also had a different set of pets. And a different kitchen and bathroom (remodel since). I think I also had a different set of friends. Haha! Funny, but not, and mostly true.

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  36. Congrats on ten years together. Who in their right mind would name a dog Montana? My husband is a first answer is always no person. He thinks he is the only one who can ever come up with a good idea. It makes me insane.

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  38. There are a few Edsel twins here in Mpls. My head takes a turn to see the cuteness overload, and I smile, thinking about Edsel and his goofy ears, big ole smiley face, and his adoration of mom. Good choice.

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  39. The look on Edsel’s face in that first photo is pure bliss. So glad he was the chosen. Happy 10, Edsel.

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  40. I have never had a dog nor wanted one. Cats are my thing. But your joy in Edsel almost makes me want one Happy 10 years of bliss !

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  41. Oh my goodness, I love this post! And I cannot believe I have been reading you for over 10 years.

    Happy Anniversary to you and Eds!

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  42. Been here since the beginning of time and loved this walk down memory lane. Edsel is the perfect name and his underbite had me as his loyal fan since day 1.

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  43. I love that first picture of you with him, when you are blonde. But I REALLY love that last picture of you with him. Happy adopt day, Edsel! I just found out the ‘rescue dog’ I got from the Humane Society for $500 (you are so right–did I buy him or rescue him? awfully large adoption fee) is not 3 or 4 years old, like they assured me, but between 7 and 10, per the vet. The only reason I got Boots was she was the oddest looking dog ever, and has a mohawk, and that was enough for me.

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  45. Happy Togetherness Day! What a lucky day for you both. Ten years goes by so quickly as does twelve. SadieDog became part of our family twelve years ago and the time has flown by.

    I’m certain Edsel will get a special treat to celebrate. Of course, being by your side is treat enough.

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  46. My grandpa was a “no” first guy. My mom and aunts talked about how grandpa’s “no” meant “I have heard your question and am now prepared to entertain your persuasive arguments.” But he was a man of few words.

    Belle

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  49. I love that first picture of you and Edsel. He has such a beautiful contented smile! A golden would have been too boring. No trying to rip out the throats of other dogs or dragging you down the street. Boring. Happy birthday to Edsel and happy momma anniversary to you.

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  52. Oh, how I love that story. It even caused a few tears. I love the Eds and am so glad you chose him, underbite and all. Or underbite, especially. I have a friend who had a black lab rescue with Edsel ears. She named her dog Radar.

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    2. I got my Scrappy Doo (changed from “Scraps”) for his car door ears, eyebrows and beard. He is Edsel colored. I had seen a much larger dog with ears like his called Satellite.

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  53. Happy Gotcha Day to Edz and you! Celebrate, good times, come on! And it’s Friday!

    I’ll keep using those damned exclamation points until I can muster enthusiasm for my own day.

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  55. Happy Birthday? Anniversary? Gotcha Day? Edsel!!!
    My husband automatically says no to everything too. His other big thing, when discussing a project or home improvement idea, is, “I can do that but you’re not going to like it.” Really, it’s a wonder I haven’t murdered him.

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  57. Oh my gosh, how I love that first picture of you with Edsel and his big smile!! I can’t believe it’s been 10 years already … Where does the time go? (Oh wait, we already discussed that recently, right?) Give Edsel a big hug from the Price family!

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