Rushed post, parts 1 and 2

I have to have Iris at the vet in 25 minutes, meaning I have to leave in 15, so what I might do is write here till I have to go, then come back and finish after. This is barring any work that comes in, but I know how work goes, and it’s unlikely any copy editing will be here this early. Copy editing is at the end of the line. Down the road a piece. At the end of our rainbow. There’s something I must say out loud.

You’re once.

Twice.

Three times a lady.

Who danced with a boy to that song at a school dance? Anyone? All of us? My first slow dance with a boy was to Stairway to Heaven, which as you’ll recall was a very long song, and the whole time I kept thinking, Man, his belt buckle is huge.

I was naaaaaave.

Anyway.

I had a Facebook discussion with someone from high school with whom I never slow danced who insists the 10 Commandments can be found, as she put it, “13 times” in the Capitol. This is profoundly untrue, and the fact that we just…repeat things and don’t make sure they’re true disturbs me. So, when I said, “That just isn’t true” and her comeback was, “Yes, it is,” I gave up. She clearly wasn’t interested in being anything but “right,” which she was not, so where can you go from there?

Other than that it’s been a painful weekend. Saturday was OK. It was pretty out, and Ned came to get me and we took a long drive out to the country in his Mustang that he is obsessed with. “There can be only one discussion of your Mustang, or anyone else’s Mustang that we see on the road,” I said, and my commandment—see what I did, there?—was not heeded.

At one point we crossed through a small town, and what would a small town be if it didn’t have a McDonald’s.

“Would you like to get a hot fudge sundae at McDonald’s?” I asked Ned cheerfully. When we met, Ned literally didn’t know how to go through a fast food drive-thru. It was the most annoying thing you’ve ever witnessed. It was like he’d just moved here from Zanzibar.

“Should we split one?” asked Ned, as we waited in line.

See.

This is a famous line of Ned’s. Any time we’re about to get anything delicious, he suggests we split it, and back when we liked each other, I would be shamed into saying OK, but now I just give him The Look and he knows the answer.

I weigh 15 pounds more than when I dated Ned.

I’d better go get Irises to the vet. I’ll be back, and I’ll retitle this Parts 1 and 2, so you know my pith has gone on.

…I’m back but I DO have work, which is why you should never assume you know things. So I must go, but suffice it to say I had a migraine the rest of the weekend, so there was nothing more to tell you except there was agony, and much lying about.

Today marks 9 years since my first date with Ned, and when we broke up we said we’d still meet every year at the place of our first date, so tonight we are meeting in the PARKING LOT of the place of our first date, and having a sparkling drink in the car, although I hope not in the Mustang, as I will have to then hear about the Mustang, and then about other Mustangs, and possibly even about the chase scene from Bullitt, which is not what I signed on for 9 years ago.

Talk to you tomorrow. Oh, and Iris’s thyroid is still OK. We are also checking her kidney function and I don’t know about that yet. She just seems off to me and I can’t figure out what it is. She seems hunchy and she doesn’t hang around the rest of us as much. Maybe we’re just one cat over the line, sweet Jesus.

Anyway, talk to you tomorrow.

49 Comments

  1. “One cat over the line, Sweet Jesus”!! OMG that killed me.
    I went to a religious school of a denomination that did not approve of dancing (Footloose!), so the parents hosted their own dances for us. I do not remember my first slow dance, but probability is VERY HIGH that is was a Foreigner song in junior high.
    NINE YEARS?! Have mercy.

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  2. Wrote a longer post and it disappeared. Miss June I think you may be wrong about D.C. and The Ten Commandments. Moses and the 10 are carved above the Capitol Bldg. On the doors into the Supreme Court and above where the justices sit. That’s just off the top of my head. I’ve been to D.C. about a zillion times, lived there a few months. Married to an Army Chaplain. Not sure of the exact number ,but it’s carved and quoted lots of places. Feel free to check it out. I expect they may not be there much longer ,but getting rid of a huge Moses statue is gonna cause some problems.

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    1. There are symbols in the Supreme Court building that allude to the idea of potentially religious ideas but do not suggest religious meaning [e.g., a man holding tablets sitting in a chair surrounded by other images of lawmakers (Confucius and Solon)]. Imagery of tablets has been used for hundreds of years in order to portray “law” itself as an element of civilization. Not every tablet in the world alludes to the 10 commandments.

      In addition, there is no image of the Ten Commandments above where the judges sit. This sculpture features two men sitting in chairs who represent “the power of government” and “the majesty of law” and are surrounded by figures representing Wisdom and Justice. the designer of this statue states that the tablet visible between the two central figures (with Roman numerals I-V on one and VI-X on the other) do not represent the Ten Commandments, but instead the first “ten amendments to the Constitution known as the ‘Bill of Rights.’”

      so….no. The Ten Commandments are not carved in their entirety anywhere in the Capitol.

      …Not to mention the Supreme Court has its own building since the 30s and is not housed in the Capitol anyway. Which, you know, kind of negates the whole thing.

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    2. I DID look it up, and what it said was there are tablets, and Roman numerals I through X, but that those represent the Bill of Rights, not the 10 Commandments. However, the place I looked (Snopes) could always be wrong.

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      1. Ah, but I see the person above me said what I said, only more eloquently. But see? This is the sort of thing that worries me: information we are certain is true, that isn’t. And it gets repeated like the Faberge Organics commercial. And they tell two friends, and so on.

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        1. What always shocks me is how many people don’t take the time to just, you know, LOOK IT UP. We read it, we like it, therefore we believe it, and then we pass it on. The easier it gets to access information, the lazier we get about checking the accuracy.

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  3. Nine years! Has it been that long since your visit with SadieDog? She has such a white face now and must have been such a young lady then.

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  4. Speaking of expensive vet visits. One of our cats is having trouble pooping. Switching to softened and wet food helped but not the complete solution. A few hundred dollars worth of examination and x-rays later: cat has severe arthritis in her back. Ok. Try this newish drug that is an anti-inflammatory and painkiller. Great…except this cat Advil at its best price is about $3.50 per 6 mg pill. Vet says, “You might consider putting all three cats on it. It’s a great preventative. At their age, they all have aches and pains.” For those of you not interested in doing the math, that’s almost four grand in cat Advil every year. The part that I find really annoying is that a dog dose of the same medicine (10 mg) is about a dollar. So less of the exact same drug costs over three times more just because its marketed for cats.

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    1. Any chance there’s a generic available at a human pharmacy? We had to get morphine which was $60+ per dose at the vet’s office because it was a controlled substance and a bunch of fees. Single digit dollars at Costco – it was worth the yearly membership fee. I had no idea I could even have it filled somewhere else until the vet receptionist recommended it since they didn’t like to scam (on everything, haha).

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      1. No. As far as I can tell it’s not used for humans, just cats and dogs. Unfortunately, there isn’t a generic version yet. The drug is Robenacoxib but it’s marketed as Onsior.

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  5. I wonder if Ned would have liked my old Mustang. A gift from then-in-laws, it was an emerald green hatchback with racing stripes. One day the ex-husband lent it to a friend who promptly ignored the “whatever you do, don’t lend it to X,” and lent it to X, who used it to knock over a 7-11. Because the escape car would blend in so well when cops were looking for it. Friends at work started calling it the Crime-mobile. But by the time police finishing tearing it to shreds to find more drugs, it was no longer worth repairing.

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  6. Sittin’ downtown in a railway station.

    I honestly do not recall the name of the song that was playing the first time I slow-danced with a boy. It was in Jr. High and was probably something like “Angel Baby” or “I’m Your Puppet” as my school had a high concentration of Hispanic students who liked listening to that music as opposed to whatever was on the Top 10 charts at the time. I also do not recall the name of the boy I was dancing with. All I remember about Jr. High dances is that all the girls would take of their shoes and just wear little no-show socks.

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  7. I do not recall my first slow dance song, but the theme of my high school junior prom was “Tonight’s the Night”. How how HOW did that pass muster in my small, oh-so-conservative high school? I was on the dance team and we were forced to re-think our shiny spanky pants. Our principal felt something that would attract less ATTENTION would be more appropriate. And then – Rod Stewart seducing the whole junior class. Good lord.

    I am quite envious of you riding around all over yonder in a Mustang. It’s my dream car. I had a chance to buy one for $200 in high school – 1965 convertible. My dad said nope – nothing but a repair nightmare. My deepest regret in life.

    Lovely post lovely June. Sorry about your hurty head… you were on a roll.

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  8. My family was all girls, so I did not know all the ways of the boys. I remember being surprised during a high school slow dance by the big belt buckle! What the heck?!?! Ah youth…
    and NO…,I do not want to split a hot fudge sundae…ever!
    June…bringing back the boner.

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  9. Best wishes for Iris and her body parts.

    I don’t know cars – it’s just colour that I recognize.

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  10. Stairway to Heaven was always the last song of the dance. Good memories

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  11. I think my first slow dance was in the middle school gym. I recall one sixth grade dance there when I wanted to dance with a boy who was giving me the cold shoulder. Good grief, I obsessed over a boy if he was uninterested. Eye roll.
    Oooh a McDonalds hot fudge sundae sounds delicious! I ate hummus for breakfast and now I have a stomach ache, so I should probably avoid McDonalds. Maybe this weekend I will get by there.

    I am glad Iris had good test results and I hope you find the source of her possible discomfort. Our vet asked me to bring in a urine sample from our dog. This dog doesn’t go potty on leash and loses her mind when she sees the leash. I have always let her have privacy in the back yard, so I have no clue how to get a sample. I read I should follow her out there and slide a container under her bottom when she goes, but I don’t think she’s going to go for that. I went outside with her this morning and she refused to do her business. It was freezing and she was like what are you doing out here, lady? She was very suspicious of me. I’m going to have to go back to Google for more tips.

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    1. Oh – good luck with this! I had to do this for my old lady dog. It took me four days to be successful – her suspicion never waned. I had to bring in two samples so there I was with two containers, as you do.

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      1. This will definitely take time. I went home for lunch and she refused to go into the yard with me. Even when I hid the catch container, she wasn’t having it. I went inside and tried to wait for her to go to the yard and she waited at the top of the steps until I gave up watching her. Sigh.

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  12. I read the high school slow dance part and instantly went back in my mind to my first slow dance- freshman year turnabout. I don’t remember the song probably because I was distracted thinking WAIT JUST A MINUTE HERE, IS THAT HIS _____??!!! Have never mentioned it to anyone and NOW you bring ‘it’ up. I, too, was very naive. So funny.

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  13. Can’t remember the song, but it was really long and I think it went up tempo at the end. But the worst thing? The guy DROOLED on me! Yeah, this milkshake brings all the drooly boys to the yard. Glad you didn’t mess up the ‘stang with yer sundae.

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  14. The first one I remember was Sail On by the Commodores. So sad. But I went to the Teen Center on Ft. Polk and danced a lot on Friday and Saturday nights. A LOT of Michael Jackson’s Off the Wall album. I still love all the songs from that era. Junior high, oddly enough, was very good to me.

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  15. I remember slow dancing in 7th grade to “She’s having my baby” by Paul Anka. How did that record make it onto the turntable with all those chaperones there?

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  16. How in the world do you remember your first slow dance? If somebody asked me that I’d look at them like they weren’t speaking English. Tilt my head like a dog. I just do not retain a lot of memories like that. Don’t remember a lot from when I was a little kid, don’t remember timelines or dates, I’m just not made that way. And I had a nice, stable growing up so I’m not afraid I’m blocking a bunch of stuff out.

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    1. My entire life, my family has been, “How do you REMEMBER that?” It’s one of my useless gifts. As I age, though, I remember almost nothing in the short-term.

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    1. There is no sharing of food in my family. If you wanted it, you should have ordered it, was the family motto.There was also a not PC reference to a scene from The Miracle Worker involving food I dated a guy who not only wanted to share, he wanted me to take it off his fork! The horror!!

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  17. There is a news story doing the rounds in my area about a man who was arrested for travelling to my particular small town (we are currently in lockdown in the UK, and not supposed to be travelling unless it is essential). His excuse was that he was going to McDonalds. Except that we don’t have a McDonalds, so everyone is finding that hilarious.

    I always try to split desserts with my husband; but we never want to eat the same things, so that never works.

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    1. (also, replying to my own comment,, how very 2021 of me).
      Also, like Paula, I read this VERYFAST bc I was worried you’d be late!

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    1. Slow dance first? Smoke Gets in Your Eyes. Yes, in a basement party summer before 7th grade. I came of age in the Johnny Mathis and Andy Williams era. Now those were slow dances!
      Hope all is well with both your fuzzy head and Iris’ fuzzy head.

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      1. Oh my God. I went to an all girl’s secondary school so sixth form college leaver’s ball (aged 18) was my first mixed event. I slow danced to Maroon 5s She Will Be Loved with a boy called Ben. I’d liked him for two years but he’d been in a steady couple. He was, in retrospect, trying to make his ex jealous but oh! I got the full smouldery stare, fingers in my hair, held close treatment. I’m glad I didn’t have a big bang buckle to give me away.

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