Right now, mostly I’m just waiting for my avocados to ripen. Continue reading “Jardins de tarte à la lune”
In the famous words of Jackie Kennedy, I had my colonoscopy. Continue reading “Aw, crap.”
“I have to blog,” I just told my mother. Not that I have a blog.
When I’m visiting her, I always emphasize how, if I’m writing, I don’t like to be interrupted. Ruins m’flow.
“I know you have you write, you’ve told me and told me,” she said from her perch in the living room. I have. I’ve tried to write all the other days she’s been here and as soon as I sit down, she’ll be all, “Where are your spoons?”
So, I said, “Okay, here I go. Really writing now.” I sat down. Stretched my claws. Poised over the keyboard.
“Did you feed Edsel?” Continue reading “At 52, June finally plays with a full deck”
Ir currently abhor my appearance. Continue reading “June D. Wattle”
Yesterday was a harrowing workday, which resulted in my shoulders up right on my ears pretty much for 8 hours. When I was done with my GODDAMN DAY, I dearly wanted a drink. I never drink during the week now, part of my weight loss plan that’s resulted in precisely no weight loss. Continue reading “Mr. Greensboro”
“Let me take you to dinner,” Ned said, Ned of the I Really Shouldn’t Hang Around Him Neds. “I’ll take you anywhere you want to go.” Continue reading “June the Amakazon”
Even though I have allegedly set it up so that when I plug my phone into my computer–and there’s something anyone said, ever, in 1947–my photos should pop right up, they never do. They USED to. I’ve no idea what’s gone wrong. Continue reading “In real life, vowels are free”
Yesterday morning, Ned texted me this photo with no further comment. Dear World: He texted me. Did you note the “ed,” there, world? Because it seems like no matter what I do, I cannot stop hearing people say, “He text me.” Goddammit. Continue reading “Adopt-a-Klwkttenfreer.”
Last night I had a ridiculous dream. (Oh, good. Someone’s gonna describe their dream.) I dreamt I met a man and didn’t care for him at first, so when we first were introduced, I gave him my most sarcastic of smiles.
This morning, I woke up at Ned’s. Continue reading “Let me call you Megan, I’m in love with you.”