See what I did, there? My roots and I waited till Saturday, when no one would read this, to write my "Here's everything I said I'd eventually come back and blog about" post.
Have you actually been sitting here for two months, growing cobwebs–making this literally a website–with the Match Game thinking music in your head, waiting for me to come back and wrap everything up? Because, you poor thing.
Who can't get enough of herself for finding the Match Game thinking music? And her website joke? I guess I went off and got.even.funnier. Who knew that was possible?
Anyway, hi. How are all y'all? When I left here two months ago I said I owed you some tying up of the loose ends, and here I am tying them.
First of all, Myssie1963 has won my friend Jo Maeder's book, Opposites Attack, and seeing as I had the ding-dang giveaway IN JUNE (the month, not in myself, which would be sort of gross), I hope Myssie still wants the book and is still alive and so forth. I'll see if I can't find an email address for her, but if anyone knows Myssie, go tell her she won the book. Why do you think she calls herself Myssie1963? Do you think she was a big fan of the Kennedy assassination, or what?
Anyway, that's done. Let's talk about poor BStar next.
So, I knew the other things I had to tie up, here, included TRYING to get everyone's photo on here from back in 1918 when I said, "Oh! Send me your picture and I'll put it up on my blog!" and then seven hundred and forty-nine MILLIONTY of you sent in a picture, and every once in awhile I'd dig through email to find more photos you sent in, and then I'd get confused. "Did I put this one up already? Didn't I?" and the whole thing turned into a NIGHTMARE requiring ALL CAPS to discuss.
I also knew that at some point in 1542, I awarded some highly coveted Abraham Lincoln Band-Aids to a reader, and I never, ever got those band-aids off to the big winner. In fact, some OTHER reader SENT me Abraham Lincoln Band-Aids just so I'd finally effing send them, and guess what's still unopened and unsent on my bathroom shelf?
The other day, I was looking through the nightmare that is these photos you guys sent me, and I wrote to this person, above, B Star. "Dear B Star," I wrote, "Did I ever put your photo on my blog?" "No," she replied.
So I set her picture aside, and then I looked into the whole band-aid debacle, and I promise you Abraham Lincoln's entire presidency and pesky war of the states was less complex than wrapping up this blog. His insurance paperwork for committing that wife was less difficult. Combing his beard was less taxing.
Insert getting-home-from-the-theater joke here.
My point is, after 86 hours of researching seven years of daily blogging, I finally found the post where someone won the DING-DANG Abe Lincoln Band-Aids, and that winner?
Was B Star.
"Were you the most neglected reader EVER?" I wrote her? "Give me your address, and I will mail these forthwith." She wrote back, and she lives, like, .00003 miles away. Seriously. Poor B Star.
And without further ado–seriously, not one more do–here are the rest of the photos, I think, that you all sent me that time I told you to send me your photo. If yours never made it in, you either didn't title it exactly BLOG PHOTO, or I screwed up. You know. Things happen, man.
Here's Gretchen, who when she SENT this in 2 B.C., said she was the person who gave me useless migraine advice. Thanks, Gretchen. In case anyone is worried sick, my head has been PARTICULARLY ludicrous lately, and am currently drugged to the gills with both Prednisone AND Topamax. Would remove own head with cleaver were that possible. I mean, I guess it IS possible, but it'd make for a dull rest of this post.
We all know who this is. This is Joann, who is my friend in real life, who ALWAYS participated in "send me your photo" day, and who just got past a RIDICULOUS health scare, but who is fine. I adore Joann very much. You go, Joann. You back that ass up. You raise the roof. You give good love. You, you got what I need. But you say he's just a friend. Yeah, you say he's just a friend. OH BABY YOU.
Who misses me? And my linear thoughts. Anyone?
Okay, dudes, am I crazy? Here's Deb in Denver, but doesn't it feel like we already SAW Deb in Denver before? Is it just that I've seen these pictures now 48 times in my email, or what? Oh, this project. Did I mention it was a mistake?
This is Melanie. Back in 2008, Melanie won the lovely turquoise pleated Totie Fields dress I gave away, and when I did the giveaway I posed in said dress:
And then Melanie got the dress and did this:
and I have loved her ever since.
This is Emily, who I remember writing to back in 1698 when I did the "send in your photo" thing, to thank her for titling it correctly, because she was the first person that day to not call it "picture" or "blawg foto" or whatever. I showed my gratitude by making her wait through nine presidential terms before her picture got up here.
Caron is the one in glasses. She tells her friend, there, to read my blog, but that friend only reads when told. YOU KILLED MY BLOG, FRIEND.
This teensy little put-it-in-your-wallet picture is of Deb in Maine. It came this way, this small picture. It's not my fault. Anyway, I know Deb read me forever, and I belive she is my Facebook friend, which means we have a deep and meaningful relationship. Deb and June, TLA.
Okay, so that's it. If I MISSED your picture, I sincerely apologize. You have no idea what a pain that was. I should have made a folder on my desktop and plopped everyone's pictures in as they came in, but perhaps you and I have not met. I am not what you would call organized. I know. I hope you were just braced.
So, now, our loose ends are tied up. And in case you are wondering, everyone is fine.
Iris continues to murder everything that remotely has the nerve to live within our back yard. There was a dead possum back there recently, and I am hoping against hope it died of natural causes. Because if that teensy sightless cat got a possum, my neighbor Peg is next.
Lu will be six next month, and I kind of feel like mostly she wonders why I felt the need to add to the pet collection, as I was doing great with just her. Mostly I feel like she kind of has a point.
Lily. Superior. The end.
Last month was the year anniversary of when someone put that puppy, Violet, in my car, so I drove out to the fire station and visited said puppy, who as you can see is no puppy anymore. She is Tallulah-sized, and she got right on my lap and sniff-sniff-sniffed my head. If you ask me, she knew just who I was. I was so happy to see her.
Edsel has the biggest news of all, because he's decided to become my running pal. Yes. My running pal.
Like an idiot, I signed up for a half-marathon, which I will run in April, and I'm going to train with Edsel, at least for the lower miles. I don't know that you're supposed to make your dog run 13 miles, even a dog like Eds.
Of course some days I'll take Talu, but she has never liked running all that much, and ever since she got hit by that car, her hips are a little stiff. Plus, I don't know if you've gleaned this through the years, but Edsel has a lot of what you might call The Energy. So. Although sometimes, as shown above, he can slow me down. What with his NEEDS and all.
At any rate, we're having a good time, and maybe I will have fewer hips and migraines, so yay. Oh, and does anyone have any headphone recommendations for running? Because could these FALL OUT MORE OFTEN? And could that be MORE IRRITATING? Exercise is so good for your moods.
And yes. I am still with Ned. I just love me some Ned. I pretty much think Ned is my person, and that's all I have to say about that. Tonight we're getting up with Dick Whitman and his woman, and I will tell Ned and DW you all said hello.
Thanks, everyone, for coming back for the tie-up post, which sounds dirtier than it was. I hope you're all Brett Sommers happy, and that your hips and migraines are few.