June wraps up her trip; bored nation rejoices

If you're just getting back from your Thanksgiving holiday, and I say "holiday" like we're all British, there are several days of my posts for you to catch up on and I wish you luck. I wish you luck mucking through all my ins and outs. For the rest of you, who kept up with … Continue reading June wraps up her trip; bored nation rejoices

It’s like I saw only 7 movies and they influenced my whole life

At the top of my new fancy blogging template is a button I click when I want to compose a new post. That button reads, "Write." It has an icon of a huge pencil looming over a very square piece of paper. Whenever I click on it, I think of Celie in The Color Purple … Continue reading It’s like I saw only 7 movies and they influenced my whole life

Typed while my mother and stepfather watch some sort of network news. You know what I never do?

"June, will you come stand at the basement door while I go down there?" Mom asked. "?" "Because at night I get scared down there. Harry usually does it but since you're here..." Why are children the indentured servant for life? "Like, you're afraid Regan from The Exorcist will grab your ankle from under one … Continue reading Typed while my mother and stepfather watch some sort of network news. You know what I never do?

You know what I had today? Turkey leftovers. Read on for more fascinating facts.

In case you were thinking it was a nightmare to travel on Thanksgiving day, you would be wrong. WRONG! I hope this causes you to hang your head in shame, and perhaps the village will stone you just a little. Really, there was nothing to it. My planes weren't even full. The only thing that … Continue reading You know what I had today? Turkey leftovers. Read on for more fascinating facts.

Losing something once solid

Remember high school angst? When nobody understood your incredibly deep thoughts and torrid emotions? I'm still like that. I also, throughout high school, was convinced I was hauntingly beautiful and no one had discovered it yet but me. But that ONE DAY, someone important at school would look at me and announce, "Good heavens, Miss … Continue reading Losing something once solid

The “I Thought I Dug You, But You Like Build-A-Bear” Section

"What if I met you, and you were still you with all your traits and everything, except for one thing: You loved you the Build-A-Bear Workshop." I like to imagine terrible scenarios to see if Ned and I would still like each other through them. "Oh, that would be bad," Ned agreed. "And here are … Continue reading The “I Thought I Dug You, But You Like Build-A-Bear” Section

Don’t say a word. Also, Hulk’s sex life.

Yesterday I had one of those horrendous workdays where you spend hours writing something, then lose the whole document forever, no matter what IT does. I wanted Superman to fly around the world and reverse time. Then today the exterminator came, not to kill me, which would have been nice, but to kill our ants. … Continue reading Don’t say a word. Also, Hulk’s sex life.

HULK!

Remember to think about Hulk at 2 p.m. (in five minutes, my time). If you read this too late, think it anyway. Our thought will be: Hulk will meet the love of his life now.