Right now, mostly I’m just waiting for my avocados to ripen. Continue reading “Jardins de tarte à la lune”
I’m glad we’re all gathered together once again. In our uncomfortable wooden pews. Our Pepe LePews.
On Friday, I had plans to get together with Jo and Kit, actual women friends, which you know how I am about that. Continue reading “Strawberry JuneCake”
“I have to blog,” I just told my mother. Not that I have a blog.
When I’m visiting her, I always emphasize how, if I’m writing, I don’t like to be interrupted. Ruins m’flow.
“I know you have you write, you’ve told me and told me,” she said from her perch in the living room. I have. I’ve tried to write all the other days she’s been here and as soon as I sit down, she’ll be all, “Where are your spoons?”
So, I said, “Okay, here I go. Really writing now.” I sat down. Stretched my claws. Poised over the keyboard.
“Did you feed Edsel?” Continue reading “At 52, June finally plays with a full deck”
Yesterday morning, I woke up just before my alarm. Once my Aunt Mary asked me, “Some mornings when you wake up, are you glad you’re still alive, cause you slept so hard you can’t believe you weren’t dead?” Continue reading “D’oh, a deer. A female deer.”
“Hey, it’s Alf, your ridiculous handyman,” said Alf, my ridiculous handyman, who clearly reads my not-blog. Continue reading “I saw a screw”
“Do you want to come downtown?” Marty Martin asked. He and Kayeeeeee were headed down for the 4th of July events all afternoon, along with 495593020404203 other people in town. Events that included “Find a Place to Park” and “Hey, it’s 90! Can YOU Live?” Continue reading “Boom”
This is a dumb day. Don’t you agree, it’s dumb? Like, we have to go to work today, and I suppose I could have taken the day off, as I have like 344449493 more days off I could take, but I forgot.
You know how I am. Continue reading “I seethed anyway”
Yesterday, I cheated on my hairdresser and held a dying kitten. So now I have PTSD and almost-black hair. Continue reading “Black”
No one is in the house right now except for Steely Dan, and I admit to the tiniest thrill of fear. There is no other animal to come to my aid, should he decide this is the moment to reveal he’s a tiny perturbed man in a cat suit. Continue reading “You just want it cause it’s gaudy.”
Aw, heck. I showered, fed everyone with fur, sat down here to not blog and noticed I had a call from a 1-800 number. Remember last month when some ass stole my identity, because everyone’s dying to be me? I have an automatic withdrawal from my gym, and let’s all giggle for a moment about “my gym.” Wow, June, you and that gym. It’s like you’re one. Continue reading “June’s outta touch, she’s outta time”