For six nights in a row

SCREEEEEEEEECH! That's what woke me up this morning, a few minutes before my alarm: SCREEEEEEEEECH! "That's actually coming from outside my head," I realized, and then I wondered if someone was being murdered. Exciting! "Coooo! Cooo! Cooooo!" I heard then, and right then I knew. Either Yoko Ono was gettin' some from my neighbor, Paul, … Continue reading For six nights in a row

But the liver and child reunion is only a motion away

I probably shouldn't be workout buddies with my ex-boyfriend, but so what. If you'll recall, from your Big Book of June Events, Ned was complaining of neck pain, and with my medical degree and minor in psychology, I determined he had all sorts of repressed feelings that were manifesting in physical sensations, a thing I … Continue reading But the liver and child reunion is only a motion away

June accidentally records her life. As opposed to this tome.

I was just uploading photos from my phone onto my computer mom boreeng and I saw among the photos a video on there that was half an hour long. "?" I asked myself. seer y uslee, we so ober this story I clicked play. It was a blank screen the whole time. You could hear … Continue reading June accidentally records her life. As opposed to this tome.

June’s fog, her amphetamines and her pearls

Sometimes I sit at this computer and think, "What the hell was I gonna say today?" This is one of those days. I was worried about Lu last night, as she was panting and moaning just a bit. Going outside, getting on the forbidden couch, and even treats didn't seem to lighten her load any. … Continue reading June’s fog, her amphetamines and her pearls

Oh, just wear your pajamas to the store, I said. What can happen? I said.

Between you and me, I was feeling a little out of sorts yesterday. A little under the weather. A little peckish. Is "peckish" hungry? Okay, then not that. I was achy, and tired, and my insides were not happy with me. If I were a mushroom, I'd be a shiitake, if you're picking up what … Continue reading Oh, just wear your pajamas to the store, I said. What can happen? I said.

June Gardens, master of the sky

"I know I'm supposed to be embracing technology and all that, but this coming year, I'm getting a calendar again. Like a regular hang-on-the-wall calendar. I missed approximately 259 birthdays this year. And appointments! I missed appointments. I hate phone calendars and electronic reminders." My boss's boss sits behind me and therefore has to hear … Continue reading June Gardens, master of the sky