Remember the guy at work who gave me the eagle calendar last year? I'm tryina find a picture of him but OH MY GOD with this slow computer, which is my other news. Here he is. He's had several funny lines on this here not-blog through the years, and anyway my point is, he brings … Continue reading Going Ham
My boss, fmr., and I just had a conversation that inspired me. She was my muse, as it were. We're having our first Book of June contest! Between now and the very last day of 2017, send me THE WORST (FREE) 2018 CALENDAR YOU CAN FIND. The winner gets 11 hundred million thousand dollars, or … Continue reading Mark your calendars! (heeee)
I can't really go into my headache study all that much, because of confidentiality and so on. But--and please don't ask for more clarification, I can FEEL you all asking for more clarification--at the beginning of the study, I had to do a pain-threshold series of tests. Yes, they inflicted pain on me. "How much, … Continue reading Pain Bryant
"So. There you go," texted Ned ("text" Ned), as he sent me the image above. For all the complaining I do about people saying "text" as a past-tense form of, you know, "text," I still hear it all the time. I also love that people write to me, "I read you everyday!" Well, you just … Continue reading Sort of a complainy post. (“What??”)
I took the day off yesterday to work on my freelance work, and then I never worked on my freelance work. Welcome to me. Welcome to the splendor of me. The first thing I did was get together for coffee with Lilly of Chris and Lilly, and I like how she has to be half … Continue reading June Gardens’ Day Off
SCREEEEEEEEECH! That's what woke me up this morning, a few minutes before my alarm: SCREEEEEEEEECH! "That's actually coming from outside my head," I realized, and then I wondered if someone was being murdered. Exciting! "Coooo! Cooo! Cooooo!" I heard then, and right then I knew. Either Yoko Ono was gettin' some from my neighbor, Paul, … Continue reading For six nights in a row
I probably shouldn't be workout buddies with my ex-boyfriend, but so what. If you'll recall, from your Big Book of June Events, Ned was complaining of neck pain, and with my medical degree and minor in psychology, I determined he had all sorts of repressed feelings that were manifesting in physical sensations, a thing I … Continue reading But the liver and child reunion is only a motion away
I had a dream that I was helping Jesus build a wall to keep out foreigners. I kept saying, "Really? Cause this doesn't seem like something you'd--okay. Hand me a nail. YOU'RE the carpenter, here, but okay." Maybe I shouldn't have watched the RNC. I also dreamed my cousin Katy (yes, I have a Katie … Continue reading Wall E
I was just uploading photos from my phone onto my computer mom boreeng and I saw among the photos a video on there that was half an hour long. "?" I asked myself. seer y uslee, we so ober this story I clicked play. It was a blank screen the whole time. You could hear … Continue reading June accidentally records her life. As opposed to this tome.
Sometimes I sit at this computer and think, "What the hell was I gonna say today?" This is one of those days. I was worried about Lu last night, as she was panting and moaning just a bit. Going outside, getting on the forbidden couch, and even treats didn't seem to lighten her load any. … Continue reading June’s fog, her amphetamines and her pearls
Gone With the Wind was on TCM last night, did you watch it? I did. I thought I'd tune in to that movie for once, see what it was all about. Am I the only person who watches a movie 496 times like that? I watched it TWO TIMES IN A ROW the day before … Continue reading Belle Waddling
Between you and me, I was feeling a little out of sorts yesterday. A little under the weather. A little peckish. Is "peckish" hungry? Okay, then not that. I was achy, and tired, and my insides were not happy with me. If I were a mushroom, I'd be a shiitake, if you're picking up what … Continue reading Oh, just wear your pajamas to the store, I said. What can happen? I said.
"I know I'm supposed to be embracing technology and all that, but this coming year, I'm getting a calendar again. Like a regular hang-on-the-wall calendar. I missed approximately 259 birthdays this year. And appointments! I missed appointments. I hate phone calendars and electronic reminders." My boss's boss sits behind me and therefore has to hear … Continue reading June Gardens, master of the sky