Catch up on June’s…hard-hitting career. The Asses of Roses edition.

It's been so long since I've gotten up in the morning and not blogged. These other posts I wrote at night, the posts since my triumphant return. Celebrate June's triumphant return at the country fairgrounds and civic center. I wish you tell you what's new with work, but I worry about getting fired. I guess … Continue reading Catch up on June’s…hard-hitting career. The Asses of Roses edition.

For me, it’s not so much March as Hobble

Rabbit, rabbit. Why do people say that at the beginning of the month? Sarah Jessica Parker always does (she's my Instagram friend), and because she does it, I think it's cute, but all my life I have no idea why people say it. But isn't this literally a rabbit, rabbit month? Isn't Easter this month? … Continue reading For me, it’s not so much March as Hobble

How to Have a Migraine: A Step-By-Step Guide

Yesterday morning, after I'd gotten up early and stressed own self over adding polls to this here not-blog (good participation, by the way!), I got an email. "Can you knock this out this morning?" I wasn't even at work yet, and already I was anxious. It's this big, several-tabbed Excel document that I copy edit … Continue reading How to Have a Migraine: A Step-By-Step Guide

June pops her head out of the cupboard (TM Dick Whitman’s mom. RIP)

A few things. A few matters. Some housekeeping. Don't you fucking hate people who say that? Is there anything you want to read less about than someone's "housekeeping matters"? I mean, other than how little you want to hear the "let me back up" details. I didn't get to go to my work Christmas party. … Continue reading June pops her head out of the cupboard (TM Dick Whitman’s mom. RIP)

The one where June misses Halloween

For years, we've been doing this project at work that is what you might call detailed. If you're a proofreader or a copy editor, all three of you, it has everything that takes time. Names you need to check? Yes. Numbers? Yes. Details that're listed in several places and they all must match? Yes. Fact-checking … Continue reading The one where June misses Halloween

Our Lady of Perpetual Calendars

I am overwhelmed. I know I said I was getting overwhelmed, but now we've crossed over into overwhelmed territory. First, there's my regularly scheduled job, and let me tell you something: Being a single person with four pets and a full-time job is really enough. Do you have a regular office job, and then do … Continue reading Our Lady of Perpetual Calendars

Try to guess the swear word I use when I hit Publish then realize I’ve not added a title.

I knew I was going to a party yesterday afternoon, so I planned my ensemble in my mind so that I could do my freelance work in peace. I showered, did my hair, put on my kabuki makeup and went to my room to put on my NEW FAVORITE black shirt and pink capris pants, … Continue reading Try to guess the swear word I use when I hit Publish then realize I’ve not added a title.

The laughs make up for the marsupial pouch

Do you know what I hate? The don't-be-so-hard-on-yourself-when-you're-trying-to-insult-yourself guy. And by "guy" I mean anyone. Look, or even looky here, as my eighth-grade algebra teacher used to say (and there's a job. Hey, this year you're gonna teach June algebra! Good luck and here's your methadone prescription), none of us are 100% happy with ourselves, … Continue reading The laughs make up for the marsupial pouch

June gives it up early. When I post this to FB, about 17 of my exes will nod their damn heads.

I'm just now forming the thought that all this time I've been feeding Steely Dan too much. I thought he was much younger, and those oh-so-easy-to-read instructions on his canned food said to feed him three times a day. But now he's seven months old, and I'll bet I don't have to feed him at … Continue reading June gives it up early. When I post this to FB, about 17 of my exes will nod their damn heads.

“I Supervised June.” A scathing guest post by my boss, fmr.

When I first became June’s boss, she brought up the idea of me writing a guest post for her blog—a whole “I Supervised June” thing. I said sure. Now I’m not her boss, and I have time to write the post. Those two things are not related. I think June expects me to tell you … Continue reading “I Supervised June.” A scathing guest post by my boss, fmr.