I just now got up and fed the regularly scheduled animals, and man, that was easy. PLOOP. Throw Edsel's food in a dish. I've moved his bowls and food tin back to the kitchen. I'd had them in this room, my computer room, at the back of the house, so his crunching wouldn't scare the … Continue reading The foreign-bean section
Television
The June Channel
You know those annoying posts where I put on my makeup and talk to you, because I'm tryina do everything at once? Yeah. So, if you read yesterday's post about my humiliation, you know I have TV now. Turns out, TV SUCKS, man. I haven't watched TV in, what, two years? Is that how long … Continue reading The June Channel
Twirl her tiny mustache
Did you ever see a TV show where the alarm goes off and the person shuts it off and immediately gets out of bed? Are there really people like that, or is it like TV gifts that are fully wrapped and you just take the top off ? I used to think those Xs on … Continue reading Twirl her tiny mustache
June wakes up to $15,000 in her account. I’M RICH!
Despite paying off almost all my credit card debt (I think this next check from my last huge freelance job will do it!), cash can sometimes be a tad low right before payday. For example. i.e. To wit: Yesterday I had $5 in checking. Nice, June. And I DIDN'T TOUCH SAVINGS, I just went home … Continue reading June wakes up to $15,000 in her account. I’M RICH!
In which June insinuates that she had a night of passion with her dog.
I have an exciting fact for you. The Dragonfly Inn from The Gilmore Girls... ...is the Waltons' house. Taaa DAAAAA! June's blog. Come for the cooking and geometry tips. Stay for the TV trivia. Website. Shit. Not blog. Son of a... You know, it wouldn't have killed Olivia Walton to put in a flower box … Continue reading In which June insinuates that she had a night of passion with her dog.
Rare. In the bloody way, not the special way.
Do you think of yourself as normal? I have never once, for as long as I can remember, considered myself to be normal. And I'm glad of it, although I haven't always been. I doubt anyone else finds me normal, either. There was one woman who was married to my friend, a woman who made … Continue reading Rare. In the bloody way, not the special way.
June gives it up early. When I post this to FB, about 17 of my exes will nod their damn heads.
I'm just now forming the thought that all this time I've been feeding Steely Dan too much. I thought he was much younger, and those oh-so-easy-to-read instructions on his canned food said to feed him three times a day. But now he's seven months old, and I'll bet I don't have to feed him at … Continue reading June gives it up early. When I post this to FB, about 17 of my exes will nod their damn heads.
The mother and childish reunion
In a fit of fiscal responsibility, I canceled my cable about a week ago, and then last night I realized I was gonna miss the intellectually stimulating Real Housewives of Orange Country reunion special. I wasn't even gonna see Ned last night, rich Ned with his cable. Ever since Ned and I decided to do … Continue reading The mother and childish reunion
June goes downtown, which is not a euphemism
Yesterday I had to go to a building downtown to attend an all-day meeting. This is the view from the balcony behind the building. Went out there to smoke my 'rette. Man, I was having a nicotine fit. It was really cool there. They took this whole back area and made it pretty. They took … Continue reading June goes downtown, which is not a euphemism
Undercover June
Morning. Do I sound intimidating? I've been watching a lot of Undercover Boss, and thank god my weekends mean a lot lately. Undercover Boss is where a CEO or president or whatever hoo-hah of a major company (7-Eleven, 1-800-Flowers, Waste Management, the Chicago Cubs) (not that I watched 109 of these this weekend or anything) … Continue reading Undercover June
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There are two birds singing outside the window, and some sort of low-buzzing bug. Nope, there's a crow. So now it's three kinds of birds. Iris is quietly eating in the kitchen window. There's a plate of homemade wishes on the kitchen windowsill. And eight is enough to fill our lives with love. I'll bet … Continue reading [this space intentionally left blank]
A loafing June, a jug of La Croix, and thou
I got a lot accomplished this weekend, and by "accomplished," I mean I watched 10 hours of the new season of Orange is the New Black. I'm kind of disappointed in myself that I didn't get all 13 episodes in, but you know, you do what you can to accomplish your goals and if you … Continue reading A loafing June, a jug of La Croix, and thou
Can o’snake ass
Oh, look! We still have boxes in here! How do, like, Army people do this, where they move all the ding-dang time? It's so taxing. But it really is nice to be here, at home, rather than a whole 'nother place. This morning I thought about how when Ned and I got up, we'd open … Continue reading Can o’snake ass
Crying with Wolves
I just woke up, which is dreadful. You know what's dreadful-ler? People who BOUND out of bed. There is no reason for those people, other than that we need firemen. My point is, I got coffee, and brought the wolves up here to be blog muses to me, which is not working because Edsel has … Continue reading Crying with Wolves
June. Peeping surreptitiously since 2006.
My last post mentioned my good deeds project. If you want to participate, two important things: Read the post before this to participate, and tell me you're in on the project there, not here. You can see only 100 comments at a time, so scroll to the end of comments, click See More Comments at … Continue reading June. Peeping surreptitiously since 2006.
Ban de Soliel, for the Saginaw tan
Well, it's back to work today. My water and I are back to work. By the way, I still look completely the same. It's day five! Shouldn't I be miraculously young-looking and incredibly hydrated by now? Instant gratification takes too long. (c) Carrie Fisher, my favorite person on earth now that Nora Ephron is dead. … Continue reading Ban de Soliel, for the Saginaw tan
First prize
Since I joined Weight Watchers on Feb. 28, I have lost 7 pounds. Which, you know, yay. So on Sunday I had the day drinker try to pick me up in the parking lot of my pedicure salon, "salon" being a strong word. Then yesterday a construction worker acknowledged me ("Hello, Beautiful!" he said into … Continue reading First prize
Hold me in your armchair you can feel my disease
Last week, Ned told me people at his workplace were sick and missing work, and on Friday night when we were out, he said, "I feel a little something in my throat, but with MY great diet and MYYYYYY workout schedule, I know I can beat a cold." That's what Ned said. He did. And … Continue reading Hold me in your armchair you can feel my disease
Cubism
God, I love coffee. Don't you? I have never understood those soda-in-the-morning people. Blech. June's blog. Getting shut off one-handedly while people hold their Diet Cokes in the other hand, since 2013. I do, though. I love it. And I even have to have tamped-down half-caf coffee because of my migraines. Okay, technically I'm supposed … Continue reading Cubism
Upstream
I have to be at work--work work, not fake work, and yay!--in 20 minutes, so I must hurry. I went out with Ned last night, to the salmon salad place we like. I usually eat half of that giant salad with an enormous piece of salmon on it, but I did Tracy Chapman workout first … Continue reading Upstream
